Sex when theres a gap between meeting

[OneOliveZebra]

Often we will go 2 weeks between dates, texts but not really phone calls/facetime inbetween.
Is it expected to jump straight back in each time ?
I feel like we start at the beginning again when theres a gap.

No of course not. I’ve been on my own for 10 years prior to this four months has not changed my world so that I can never go back. Don’t worry 🤣

I know I’ve got to throw him back but decent alternatives are thin on the ground

Maybe, but while you're tied up with this guy, you're not available to find someone else.

Unless you're going to start dating other people at the same time. Which anyone decent would probably reject you for.

Heh good to know! I was worried there for a minute!! 😄

I guess you have two options: make your peace with the situation as is, without any expectation of it ever being anything more. If you just want a bit - the minimum, let's be fair - of companionship and some sex every so often, then it's fine to stick with this. If that's not good enough then just rip the plaster off. You'll certainly not find someone else while you're wrapped up in this pseudo relationship.

I’ve had a similar situation, I wanted to private message but not sure if it will let me.

Believe it or not though, some guys will do that inbetween meet up’s to almost have a relationship but they aren’t. Who genuinely want to and like messaging.
But it also keeps the woman hooked on to him. Even if they don’t meet the next weekend around etc.
Otherwise things would be a bit flat, if the guy just didn’t bother inbetween, knowing that the woman will just get sidetracked and most likely start turning her head to someone else.

I thought you said you were done with him?

You have a choice here, and it looks like you're choosing to be short changed with someone who couldn't care less.
I really don't understand why you're doing this to yourself.

I'd say if the spark and longing to see each other isn't there at the start then there isn't much hope for the future. I started off seeing my current partner weekly as that is all schedules allowed...then we started making the time and became each others priority. We did end up having sex together when we could and sometimes that might have been pouncing on each other the moment we were alone without the chat! Always intimacy and connection afterwards though.

But we had constant messaging and sometimes phone calls in between, plus dates where we'd just walk or have coffee. Even when we were both too busy to properly chat we'd let each other know or catch up at the end of the day. None of that felt like an effort and from what you're describing this sounds like a lot of hard work.

I know I’ve got to throw him back but decent alternatives are thin on the ground.

This is a crappy reason to stay with someone. Can you imagine how you’d feel if you knew your partner was thinking this about you?

It seems like you’re hesitating about breaking up with him because you’re avoiding feeling your anxiety about being alone forever.

It’s unlikely to be forever, but aside from that, you’ve got to feel your anxiety and move through it to be in with any chance of being good for someone. You can’t find someone who’s good for you until you’re in a place where you can be good for others.