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Original poster

How to split cost of Center Parcs with partner

143 replies

MidnightMummy · 10/04/2025 11:00

I am hoping to gain some outside perspective as my partner and I can't agree! We are planning on taking my two children to Center Parcs in the summer holidays. The cost of a 2 bed lodge is £1449 regardless of numbers. The cheapest way one person could visit it to stay in a hotel room for £549 (or £699 with self-catering facilities). He won't have been in the kids lives for long by that point but we have been seeing each other for over a year. How much should we each be paying?

OP posts:
ByQuaintAzureWasp · 10/04/2025 13:57

Ask him what he thinks is fair. It doesn't really matter what anybody else thinks, just you and him.

If I were him, I'd pay half.

BelfastBard · 10/04/2025 13:58

FKAT · 10/04/2025 13:46

You did the right thing OP - I think it's tight AF he didn't offer to go half. We always split everything by adults in our family. If I was going with a friend and her two kids, I would pay half.

Some people have low standards for men. Apparently we should be grateful any man would want to go out with a single mum so they should lighten their load.

Edited

If the roles were reversed and OP had met a man with two children, invited her on holiday then asked her to pay for half of it would you feel the same way?

FKAT · 10/04/2025 13:59

BelfastBard · 10/04/2025 13:58

If the roles were reversed and OP had met a man with two children, invited her on holiday then asked her to pay for half of it would you feel the same way?

Show quote history

Yeah I would. Bills split between adults as I said.

Silvers11 · 10/04/2025 14:00

Westfacing · 10/04/2025 13:09

I think that's the best thing to do - if he's quibbling about the difference between a quarter/a third imagine what he'll be like at each meal out or every time you buy an ice cream!

Show quote history

If anything, I think it was the OP who was quibbling, to be honest!! It wasn't going to cost her anything extra whether he went or didn't!! It's a fairly new relationship, they aren't living together and her children barely know him yet!!

arcticpandas · 10/04/2025 14:07

Well done OP for not imposing him on your kids. The fact that he insisted on paying 1/4 would have bothered me though and it would have been the end of the relationship.

Zippitydoodaa · 10/04/2025 14:09

Many years ago I met a lovely man .I had 3 kids , he always wanted to pay for us all
But I always paid for mine and kids share
It took him a while to get used to my independence . We were together 30yrs before he died .

holrosea · 10/04/2025 14:44

FWIW I would split it into thirds.

I earned the same as my ex. He had 1DC and when discussing living together we agreed to split things according to "fiscal parts". Where I am, an adult in full-time employment is 1 whole part, and a child in their custody is 0.5.

I was 1 whole part or 40% of the 2.5 total, and he and his DC were 1.5 parts or 60% of the total.

I think your problem is that your DP is not allowing for the fact that he has chosen to date a person with children. I could have argued with my ex that I'd pay only 1/3, but that would have completely ignored the financial reality of dating a parent.

He is entitled to his opiniona nd money is tricky, but given his reluctance to participate financially in a kid-focused get away, I'd leave him out of this holiday.

I'd have a calm chat later about how he sees things if/when you do have kid-focused days out or trips, or if you eventually end up living together. If his attitude is entirely "your DC are your own and I am not prepared to subsidise them", perhaps he is not step-dad material.

category12 · 10/04/2025 15:06

MidnightMummy · 10/04/2025 12:41

Thanks all for your input, I didn't think I would get so many replies!

I will be going solo with my kids so we can put the calculators away 😆

Yeah, that makes sense.

Bit too soon to holiday as a family.

DaisyChain505 · 10/04/2025 15:39

FKAT · 10/04/2025 13:59

Yeah I would. Bills split between adults as I said.

Show quote history

I call BS on this.

If a childless female wrote a post on here saying her new boyfriend who had two children asked her to come on holiday with him but also pay for half of it posters would be calling him a CF and telling the poster it was a huge red flag that this man wanted her to pay towards his children’s holiday (who she had barely spent any time with)

We’re not talking about a blended family and a stepdad who’s been in the children’s lives for years. We’re talking about a man who has been asked to join his girlfriend’s family holiday to get to know her kids. OP is the CF for asking her boyfriend to contribute towards her children’s trip.

DaisyChain505 · 10/04/2025 15:42

holrosea · 10/04/2025 14:44

FWIW I would split it into thirds.

I earned the same as my ex. He had 1DC and when discussing living together we agreed to split things according to "fiscal parts". Where I am, an adult in full-time employment is 1 whole part, and a child in their custody is 0.5.

I was 1 whole part or 40% of the 2.5 total, and he and his DC were 1.5 parts or 60% of the total.

I think your problem is that your DP is not allowing for the fact that he has chosen to date a person with children. I could have argued with my ex that I'd pay only 1/3, but that would have completely ignored the financial reality of dating a parent.

He is entitled to his opiniona nd money is tricky, but given his reluctance to participate financially in a kid-focused get away, I'd leave him out of this holiday.

I'd have a calm chat later about how he sees things if/when you do have kid-focused days out or trips, or if you eventually end up living together. If his attitude is entirely "your DC are your own and I am not prepared to subsidise them", perhaps he is not step-dad material.

Calling him not step dad material because he won’t cough up (a lot) of money to take his girlfriends kids on holiday is a reach.

He barely knows the kids and this is a big difference from treating them to a McDonald’s to show your willing.

holrosea · 10/04/2025 17:03

DaisyChain505 · 10/04/2025 15:42

Calling him not step dad material because he won’t cough up (a lot) of money to take his girlfriends kids on holiday is a reach.

He barely knows the kids and this is a big difference from treating them to a McDonald’s to show your willing.

Show quote history

I'd just like to reiterate that I said "he is entitled to his opinion and money is tricky".

I also did not declare him to be "not stepdad material". I suggested a calm chat later to establish if he might be in the longer term. For clarity:

If his attitude is entirely "your DC are your own and I am not prepared to subsidise them", perhaps he is not step-dad material.

I actually started splitting things 40/60 long before the moving in discussion: on holiday, he paid for his DC's flights but we had a kitty for all dinners/ice creams/day trips that was 40/60.

OP posted for opinions, I gave mine.

bigraspberry · 10/04/2025 18:02

BlondiePortz · 10/04/2025 11:15

You want the father for the op and her bf to have a holiday? Really?

Show quote history

What on Earth are you talking about?

AnonAnonmystery · 10/04/2025 18:24

@DaisyChain505 what does CF mean? Not familiar with this abbreviation:(

Maitri108 · 10/04/2025 18:48

Some of you are very generous. I wouldn't pay half of some bloke's family holiday.

NatureOverNightclubs · 10/04/2025 18:53

Pay for your own kids

Gymbunny2025 · 10/04/2025 18:58

TwistedWonder · 10/04/2025 12:19

You’ve only been together a year and you’re expecting him to subsidise your DC who he barely knows already as well as helping you with their childcare?

Honestly if I wanted a new partner to come on holiday with me and my DC, I’d pay for the lot and he could pay for a few meals etc. It’s a holiday he’s going on for you - jig one hrs chosen himself so his offer of 1/4 is more than fair

And I would say the whatever way round the sexes were

Agree with this. Assuming young children what’s the point of him going even? He’ll just be helping with childcare then you’ll go back to your separate accommodation?

PullTheBricksDown · 10/04/2025 19:01

I think a quarter is fair. It'll be a child focused holiday and he'll be tied into doing things they want to do. As will you, but you're their mum.

PullTheBricksDown · 10/04/2025 19:03

Maitri108 · 10/04/2025 18:48

Some of you are very generous. I wouldn't pay half of some bloke's family holiday.

You could easily turn that on its head. Why should 'some bloke' pay half of her family holiday? That's more accurate IMO as it's her kids going, therefore her family, therefore her family holiday.

Daisy12Maisie · 10/04/2025 19:26

I don’t think he should be paying more than a quarter.
Saying that my bf is paying more than me for a holiday in the summer with both of our kids. I was not keen to go though and there are some complexities around one of his children (too outing to give details) but basically he needs my help with his child or he won’t want to take him away as it will be stressful for him. If I go I will end up doing the majority of the work on the holiday and it becomes an actual holiday for him. So he is paying for the majority of it for me, him and 4 kids in total but that’s because he had a specific reason for doing so. He needs my help on the holiday.

Sidalee7 · 10/04/2025 19:34

MidnightMummy · 10/04/2025 11:00

I am hoping to gain some outside perspective as my partner and I can't agree! We are planning on taking my two children to Center Parcs in the summer holidays. The cost of a 2 bed lodge is £1449 regardless of numbers. The cheapest way one person could visit it to stay in a hotel room for £549 (or £699 with self-catering facilities). He won't have been in the kids lives for long by that point but we have been seeing each other for over a year. How much should we each be paying?

I have 2 dc and a partner of over a few years and he has paid half on flights and all of our holidays since we first went away after around a year.
A quarter is ridiculously tight and would make me think he’s not up for being part of a family.

FKAT · 10/04/2025 19:45

5 pages of asking why a childless man would go to CentreParcs and no mention of anal sex. MN has changed and not for the better.

bigraspberry · 10/04/2025 19:54

The " bloke " that should be paying is the father of the children unless there is an arrangement to the contrary as in when I take them I pay all etc. And some women wonder why men might not want to date women with children 🙄

Sunshineandgrapefruit · 10/04/2025 20:10

He pays half and you pay for the food and drinks (seeing as there's 3 of you)

DaisyChain505 · 10/04/2025 22:28

AnonAnonmystery · 10/04/2025 18:24

@DaisyChain505 what does CF mean? Not familiar with this abbreviation:(

Cheeky fucker x

Iamuhtredsonofuhtred · 10/04/2025 23:26

I’m going away for Easter break with my kids and my boyfriend for the first time; I’m paying the accommodation, he offered to contribute but I said no. If it was just the two of us we could stay in a flat, but because I’m bringing my kids we need a much bigger place. He’ll bring food and he’s paying for a day out when we are there. It’s supposed to be a nice thing, why argue over money?