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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Should I contact him after 5 and a half years??

111 replies

Warmautumnbreeze · 14/03/2025 18:48

5ish years ago I met a man on a night out and we met up a few times for day dates and were in touch daily over WhatsApp and phone calls. He lived around an hours drive from me and we both had kids so we didn't see each other much, but when we did I got to know him a bit and found he was really genuine and kind.

It didn't really go anywhere because I'd only been divorced about a year, my kids were still young and I didn't feel I could give a relationship or him the time he would deserve. So I broke it off and he was really understanding and said he'd want to remain friends. We're friends on Facebook and would occasionally comment on each other's posts, wish happy birthday etc. One day I sent him a message and I could tell from his reply he was calling a day on us being in touch, and shortly after I saw on Facebook that he was in a relationship. Fine, I was happy for him, he's a lovely guy.

I haven't had any relationships since my divorce (I'm not counting what I had with this man as a relationship because it was so short lived). I have occasionally thought of this man and felt fondly of him and thought I hope he's happy and then thought nothing more of it.

Anyway, to the point. Today I decided to clear up my WhatsApp, I had groups and message threads in there back to 2018. I came across my chat with this man and re read it and was reminded of how lovely he was, and I felt like it was a shame I let a decent man go as there aren't that many around (I certainly haven't found any!). Out of curiosity I looked on his Facebook and can see he is now single. I feel like I want to reconnect with him and see how he is and how the last few years have been since we last spoke. Maybe even see if something could happen between us again.

I'm undecided what I should do and don't want to ask people irl about this so I'm asking the wise women of mumsnet, what do you think I should do? Contact him or not contact him?

OP posts:
DashingDinosaurs · 17/03/2026 19:15

Wonderful news. Have a brilliant holiday and a great future together. 🥰

lhun3 · 17/03/2026 20:04

It’s amazing how invested you can feel with someone else’s journey 🥰

Thank you @Warmautumnbreezethis is the first time I’ve smiled today!

washinwashoutrepeat · 17/03/2026 20:23

This is such a lovely thread

LasVegass · 17/03/2026 20:36

So pleased for you ❤️

ColinOfficeTrolley · 17/03/2026 20:49

Warmautumnbreeze · 17/03/2026 16:01

Checking in with a one year update 👋.
We're very happy, have our first holiday abroad planned with all our kids this summer. I'm so glad I contacted him, can't imagine life without him now 💕.

LOVE THIS ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️

ClaudiaNaughton · 17/03/2026 21:33

That’s great!

1dayatatime · 18/03/2026 21:54

Firstly thank you @Warmautumnbreezeso much for keeping us updated after all this time.

Your thread is special in so many ways, too often we see OP start threads never to respond. Secondly in a sea of angry and polarised threads, yours is a refreshingly simple and honest.

And lastly it has a fairy tale ending - so so happy for you.

Please please keep us updated 🙏

Beaniebobbins · 18/03/2026 22:43

And they all lived happily ever after ❤️❤️

lovely update, so glad it worked out well.

whattheysay · 18/03/2026 23:02

What a lovely update very happy it’s worked out for you both

ThisIsMyYearToFindMyself · 18/03/2026 23:23

What a wonderful update!

What’s that saying, what is for you won’t go by you or something?

Icanflyhigh · 18/03/2026 23:35

Warmautumnbreeze · 17/03/2026 16:01

Checking in with a one year update 👋.
We're very happy, have our first holiday abroad planned with all our kids this summer. I'm so glad I contacted him, can't imagine life without him now 💕.

Absolutely LOVE this!!!

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