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Original poster

Would you date a man who was unfaithful ?

67 replies

riboon · 09/03/2025 19:31

To his previous partner, at the end of a twenty year relationship. By his ex partners account, they were just waiting for their only child to grow and leave home before they parted ways?

OP posts:
Eileen101 · 09/03/2025 19:33

No, but I'm probably just salty because mine cheated 🤷10 years down the pan.

TwistedWonder · 09/03/2025 19:34

No - cheating involves deception and lying and I don’t find liars attractive.

We only stayed together for the kid is the first line of the cheats script along with ‘I ding have sex with my wife’

Cherryonthetop94 · 09/03/2025 19:34

No.

Fluffywabbits · 09/03/2025 19:35

Absolutely not, would never be able to trust they wouldn't do it again

MarkingBad · 09/03/2025 19:38

Not again, no. It never used to bother me but I also didn't realise how damaging it was too.

Not all cheaters reoffend but enough do and I can't be doing with all that bs these days.

Twoshoesnewshoes · 09/03/2025 19:42

Depends.
If they genuinely had cheated in one relationship then I'd consider it.
Not a repeat offender though.

Ritzybitzy · 09/03/2025 19:47

Yes.

I cheated on my ex. One of my exes. There is often a context and a difference between a serial cheater and one off.

it really depends.

DoYouReally · 09/03/2025 19:48

No. Past behaviour in relationships is greatest predictor of future behaviour.

mindutopia · 09/03/2025 19:51

As a proper intelligent grown up, no. I definitely did in my 20s with predictable results! They all cheated on me. Dh never cheated on anyone and we’ve had a happy, healthy 17 year marriage so far with no infidelity.

ColourBlueColourPurple · 09/03/2025 19:55

Definitely not. Their morals and integrity levels wouldn't align with mine.

outerspacepotato · 09/03/2025 20:07

Why couldn't he wait until they were divorced?

Sounds like a lie, so no.

EwwSprouts · 09/03/2025 20:11

No.

Pinkissmart · 09/03/2025 20:14

But if they were both mutually waiting for children to grown and leave, then surely they both agreed it was ok to seek companionship outside the marriage?

ThePoetsWife · 09/03/2025 20:14

Why would you want to be with a deceitful liar?

Trust is so important.

coldcallerbaiter · 09/03/2025 20:15

Nobody knows if someone has not cheated in the past on someone else or on you for that matter. Cheating is not always disclosed or discovered 😪People who say I have been with blah for 20 years and no cheating, his whole friend group and their wives might know but you don’t…it’s just that you know of. If I knew, it would effect my judgement of them, it’s only natural. I might overlook a one-off depending on the circumstances. Generally not though.

Subwaystop · 09/03/2025 20:16

Are you saying you spoke to the ex partner who was cheated on and that’s what they said? I’m confused.

LemonNLimes · 09/03/2025 20:16

possibly

JadeMember · 09/03/2025 20:17

I cheated on my first husband. I wasn’t happy and I fell in love with someone else. I did leave my husband for him. I have never cheated since then and the thought would never cross my mind now

skintbuthappyish · 09/03/2025 20:17

No. My cheated after a 20 year relationship, he tried to hide it but the woman repeatedly messaged me and my family members gloating. I had never met her, never heard of her, she lived over 50 miles away.

I ended it. I was devastated.

BlondiePortz · 09/03/2025 20:18

No because I would not be that desperate for a man to be totally honest

Epidote · 09/03/2025 20:19

Only if he cheated when he was 15. Like teens starting love life etc. Anything older than that is a no.
Full grown adults must know better what a partner mean.

SamanthaJonesWasRight · 09/03/2025 20:20

No, I don't like liars. And my ego doesn't let me believe there's anything particularly special about me that means he wouldn't do it to me in future.

Papadonut · 09/03/2025 20:20

If he was a stupid teenager or early 20s when it happened maybe. But I firmly believe people's values and morale are set by a certain age. So no.

Dappy777 · 09/03/2025 20:48

I wouldn’t if he’d cheated within a happy marriage, or had cheated on a pregnant partner, or within a short time of meeting her, etc. But the situation you describe is more forgivable. I never condemn someone for having an affair until I know the details. Often, people aren’t looking for sex and thrills, just affection and intimacy, which their partner no longer provides. I would not have blamed my grandfather for cheating on my grandmother, for example. She was a miserable, selfish, screeching little monster who made his life a misery.

VaddaABeetch · 09/03/2025 21:15

Dappy777 · 09/03/2025 20:48

I wouldn’t if he’d cheated within a happy marriage, or had cheated on a pregnant partner, or within a short time of meeting her, etc. But the situation you describe is more forgivable. I never condemn someone for having an affair until I know the details. Often, people aren’t looking for sex and thrills, just affection and intimacy, which their partner no longer provides. I would not have blamed my grandfather for cheating on my grandmother, for example. She was a miserable, selfish, screeching little monster who made his life a misery.

What’s that cheate on a pregnant partner? That’s ok ? What the feck

Any man who is married who stood in front of witnesses & said live honour & cherish. Well nope. He’s a liar