Child age 6 Gifted & Talented

[googlestarz]

Which setting is best?

State school? Private? Home education?

Struggling to know what's best..

Gifted, talented and possible Dysgraphia / social/ emotional issues..

Wonderful, curious, bright boy.. struggles with friendships and school exhausts him.. home Ed not enough social time..

I don’t think anyone can tell you which setting is best without knowing your child well. What is his current school like? Can you afford private? Do you think a smaller setting with fewer children and more individual attention would work better for him? If he is finding it difficult with social interaction at school home ed might not be best, but a different type of school setting might make a difference. Lots of questions to think about!

Could you say more? What setting(s) has he tried so far, and can you give more detail about the issues he has had?

Do you (and your partner if you have one) work, and if so is there flexibility around your hours? Is moving to another area for a better education possible? Are there siblings to take into account?

He tried private but became too structured and academic quickly.. he struggles with writing..

For state schools we would likely need to move.. we do live near a state school but it's not great..

For private they are all a travel away or we have to move to be closer..

He is very bright, mature and struggles to connect with his peer group..

It sounds as though he is "gifted" in some ways (you do not specify) but struggling in others.

Visit some schools - do not go on about gifted when you are there - just get the vibe and see if he will fit in. He needs a school where he can develop his social skills and singling him out as gifted will not help.

If he was in private but it became too "academic" too quickly then it may be that he is twice exceptional - so gifted and talented and also with some special educational needs.

What does he struggle with?

What's he good/gifted with?

In what way are they gifted? Seems a bit early and too much pressure for 6 year old.

It sounds like he needs a fairly relaxed environment. Maybe an extra support school would be best.

How is he gifted? You say school became academic too soon. If he's not academic then what are his gifts?

Have you had a WISC V to actually see where his strengths and weaknesses lie?

DD is highly gifted in several areas, but 'average' processing and working memory which was hidden at mainstream primary although always knew she was brighter than average. Since being assessed with the WISC V which flagged this spiky profile (as part of her ASD assessment) she'll get extra time in her exams so she can fully meet her potential.

DD can do extremely complex maths written down, but struggles with seemingly simple things like telling the time in 24 HR and times tables due to working memory.

Being Twice Exceptional, the term for gifted with a disability can be very frustrating for the parents and child as they can be incredibly capable on one hand and completely pants at other 'simple' things.

DD got a place at a selective girls school but they didn't offer any bursaries as it was COVID. She has done well at a very supportive state comp but that is a bit of a roulette.

The local comprehensive school my DCs go to will stretch gifted and talented kids. My DC does several classes with older year groups. When she is with her form class, her teacher gives her stretch activities. She's also asked to help other kids. I think local comps can be a bit hit and miss, so you need to see what interventions are available.

Yes twice exceptional was mentioned to us through potential plus we had a call with them..

Maybe dyslexic / struggle with social... but very bright and capable in a few areas.. potential ASD on pathway..

Our local state is not a good school. Private is very expensive we could stretch but it would be tough..

He needs to be around kids.. I'm really stuck!

What is a WISC profile?? I've never heard of this!

WISC is an intelligence assessment that looks at 5 core areas of cognitive ability. The clinic we went to for DDs autism assessment offered it as part of the £2.5k charge, it was in actual fact more useful than the actual ASD diagnosis because it explained in more depth why she struggled with certain things and fantastic with others and was useful for school staff.

You can probably get it done separately look for ED Psych officers / psychology clinics, it consists of a series of fun activities and looking at pattern recognition, sequencing, spatial awareness, verbal comprehension.

WISC scoring, DD hit 147+ for some areas and then 'just' 112 on others, spikiness is very common in autistic children

Standard Scores
Qualitative Descriptions
Percent of Cases

130 and above
Extremely High
2.2 %

120 - 129
Very High
6.7 %

110 - 119
High Average
16.1 %

90 - 109
Average
50 %

80 - 89
Low Average
16.1 %

70 - 79
Very Low
6.7 %

69 and below
Extremely Low
2.2%

If you can afford it and school will agree flexi school + a specialist tutor. Depending where you live there are lots forest schools / alternative provisions you could use part of the week. If you had ehc plan you could ask for a bespoke programme with some of education delivered otherwise than at school and then it would be council funded but usually there have to be significant needs to get that at age 6. Doing some testing good idea. Alternative provisions specialising in autism can often help with social skills and also in advising school how to make adjustments. Sometimes they can do testing too. A lot of pupils locally go to dyslexia specialists a day a week. Do any local schools have hubs or units with smaller group provision. I’ve never seen any provision in a school whether state, special or private that comes close to quality of 1:1 specialist input available outside of school.

@HPandthelastwish thank you for the information! Great to know. I've never heard of this before.

Can you recommend a private clinic for this? I guess it's not offered on the NHS. We are close to London.

No we aren't near London Sono help on that front "WISC V assessments London" returns lots of hits on Google though.

Fab thank you :)

I have adhd and was looking at a post on the ADHD Foundation a good while back and they were including gifted as an issue. I queried this but they said it causes problems as the child is expected to be more advanced than they can cope with.

I was probably twice exceptional as a kid, it did me no favours.

Definitely a light touch but structured environment with a relaxed teaching style. It makes such a difference being comfortable. Indulge his interests but note his spiky profile and support him in areas where he is struggling. Confidence is everything.

@Bigbrommieowner he struggles with self esteem and confidence massively

Needs help setting boundaries and advocating for himself

We feel very protective of him due to this.

My DD is a 2e child, with dysgraphia and ADHD. The dysgraphia was diagnosed as part of a WISC V assessment, but the ed psych we saw for this thought her attention was fine because she focused throughout the WISC V (probably because it was 1:1 and novel).

She was able to coast in the state primary she went to as the focus is generally on those not achieving expected levels or with very significant SEND. She's just moved to a small independent primary and it is really suiting her. She's getting genuine extension work and 1:1 time in lessons. They do much more varied activities with specialist teachers, so she's less bored. The SENDCO isn't overwhelmed with an unrealistic workload, so has time to find out what works for DD. I think we may have been lucky in the school we've chosen. I don't think she'd have been happy in a hothouse, super academic school, despite being 'gifted'. She needs to be somewhere accepting and embracing of her quirks.

Hi,

I don't have a lot of knowledge around this area but I visit lots of different schools on a professional basis.

Atelier 21 is based in Crawley and may offer the kind of environment you are looking for. Apologies if I have missed where you live!

I'm not sure if they are branching out further afield but it may be worth a visit if the location works for you.

When I visited, children were free to choose the activities they did and were supported with these choices. For me, it was a little too progressive but I have grown up with a huge amount of structure.

This is the google summary: "Atelier 21 is a progressive school, designed to offer an education fit for children’s futures. Our school enables high levels of self-directed learning, facilitates student agency and fosters innovation, curiosity and creativity which help young people compete, contribute and thrive in our ever-changing modern world. Our school is the UK’s first Reggio Emilia inspired, enquiry-based learning, Future School for 4-16 years."

Ps I'm not linked to them at all so can't comment on how well they teach etc beyond the little snapshot I gained from a 2 hour visit.

What Re you doing now? What have you tried?

I have two DC, now in their mid to late 20s. When they started secondary, I was told they were in the GAT cohort. I had no idea what that meant or that they'd been identified as such through primary.

State schools, btw.

It wasn't until one parents' evening that the youngest's English teacher said about Oxbridge. I was puzzled, never heard that term before. She asked did I not know that both of my DC were in the top 5% in the country? Nope, not a clue.

Aged 6, I think that's a tough one to call. Unless you're millionaires, pushy as hell, seriously academic, what's wrong with state? I have a heritage building surveyor and a biomedical scientist as adult DC now.

If your DC is talented, they'll thrive wherever they are.

OP when you say he is “very bright” what do you mean ? Eg has he had any form of assessment? In what areas is he gifted or talented ? As that will make a difference to my response,

My son (6) sounds like yours. ASD, incredibly clever, insanely (scarily) good at maths, excellent at reading, but social and emotional issues, and terribly anxious. His handwriting is just about okay. He's in a private school in a class of 13 and thriving ... at the moment.

Not in the UK but we have the extreme good luck to live within driving distance of a small class for 'twice exceptional' kids within an otherwise-standard primary. They are structured and have the specialized teachers to handle these very bright, sometimes-challenged children. These children do need careful handling which is different from more standard teaching. The children in my son's class all arrive rather damaged from trying to fit into environments that just weren't right for them in primary school, and there's a lot of focus on creating an environment where they can heal up, become more confident and relaxed and then finally they are ready to actually apply themselves. The teachers pay as much, or more, attention to the whole child than academic achievement, and actually spend a fair bit of time with incoming parents trying to persuade them not to fuss about results. Those come later.

They have some kids whose early assessments indicate IQs of 160+ ...!

I say this not to rub it in, but if there is the equivalent sort of school or class near you with a good reputation, I can't recommend it highly enough. The children also tend to find more peers, both intellectually and at times socially. Our son was going downhill fast in a very good but standard primary; now he's flourishing.

Mind you arranging a party for a pile of Twice-Exceptional kids is quite a lively experience.