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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Partner walked out

83 replies

Niamh84 · 26/01/2025 12:45

My partner walked out on me and our 12 month old. He has blocked my number, I can’t make contact. I have no idea what his plans are, we were messaging initially, where amongst lots of things he told me I’m a fat, lazy c**t and he hates having to pretend to love me. I work 40 hours per week and I’m the main financial provider as well as I do 90% of daycare drop off, laundry, cooking and cleaning. So how he thinks I’m lazy I don’t know. He also said I am too slow to lose the baby weight, I have gone up about 10/12lbs, so I’m not exactly huge, I do have a very wobbly belly but he told me previously he loved it as it carried out precious child. Before blocking me he advise if I hassle him for maintenance or to look after the child, he would have to get a barring order against me. He also said he’s online dating now and hopefully meet someone less evil than me. I had PPDPPA, but I’m actually really well in recent months. I know it was difficult for him, as he’s not a believer in mental health issues and his family have the same beliefs. They believe it’s laziness more than anything. What do I do? Try and contact him via solicitor or just wait and see?

OP posts:
HipToTheHopDontStop · 26/01/2025 15:43

What an absolute shock that he has other children he doesn't pay for, and has cheated on every woman.

Why do women shack up with these men? You znr pretend to not know what they're like. Use this as a lesson OP, to not put yourself in this position again

Gettingbysomehow · 26/01/2025 15:47

You don't need to contact this prick but you do need him to contribute financially and if he thinks he doesn't he is a fool. Make sure he pays. You can do that without contacting him at all. There is nothing he can do about it.

NotthinglikeaBondGirl · 26/01/2025 15:49

Niamh84 · 26/01/2025 14:54

Aw that sounds lovely, your grandkids are blessed. I will have support, once I ask for it. His parents don’t see his older kids who live minutes down the road from them: maybe at Christmas and that’s it.

Well Fuck them as well as him.

You are so much better off on your own. As I said, you are a strong, intelligent woman - you can do this.

I will light a candle-prayer for you tonight and for all abused women as my DH & me often do. My thoughts and prayers with you lovely lady. x

Verydemure · 26/01/2025 15:49

What a bellend he is. At least you know who he is now.

sounds like you dodged a bullet. Life will surely be easier ( and def not harder) without him

FindusMakesPancakes · 26/01/2025 16:39

tothelefttotheleft · 26/01/2025 15:36

@FindusMakesPancakes

If he's got other children he doesn't support and he's self employed there is no way he'll pay child support.

Yes, I was typing when OP wrote that.
I had already said it probably wasn't worth the fight if he has nothing to fight for.

tothelefttotheleft · 29/01/2025 20:08

@FindusMakesPancakes

Hope you haven't had to live that scenario like I have. Best wishes.

Niamh84 · 30/01/2025 09:42

tothelefttotheleft · 29/01/2025 20:08

@FindusMakesPancakes

Hope you haven't had to live that scenario like I have. Best wishes.

Hope all worked out?

OP posts:
pikkumyy77 · 30/01/2025 17:51

If anyone comes at you with accusations that you were somehow responsible for the relationship ending or for his hurt feelings or trash talking just be prepared:

”Sometimes things just don’t work out for Ex romantically. I don’t know why he’s taking my kicking him out so hard though.? Its happened to him multiple times already. He should be used to failing out of relationships.”

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