Is it me??? Opinions please.....

[InDisbelief]

I am in the process of applying for a drivers liscence having not yet learned

My mother called me up this eveing saying that she and my father had decided to buy a 1989 Volvo which I could have the use of if I pay for its upkeep.

I pointed out that it may not be the best idea since it would not be very economical on petrol and the insurance would be quite high. I was thinking of getting a small car (like a Corsa). I only said it in a matter of fact voice and was quite polite.

At this point she started shouting at me and saying how ungrateful I was - I should be pleased. I doubt we could afford to run a big car like that.

What do the people of mumsnet think?

I agree that you are in the right. I can see why your mum might be a bit affronted but if you handled it as politely as you did, then I think she was out of order to go balistic.

I'd have told her that although you really appreciate the sentiment, you'd have really appreciated her chatting to you about it first so that you could've avoided her getting upset.

No,not ungrateful at all! Presumably they want the Volvo primarily for themselves. Is this how it is supposed to work or what?

It would be an odd choice straight after getting your licenc.

More dtails please!

She's mad! Ignore her and get the car you want.

Maybe they thought the Volvo was a nice safe (tank like) car in case you had any bumps !?

Actually you'll probably find an old Volvo is cheaper on the insurance than a newer Corsa.....

We (well DH) had an old Mondeo - quite a large car, and I was insured on it. We got a newer Fiesta - and as I was still learning - we had to take me off the insurance for it as it was more expensive!!!!

Got a friend with an old volvo - apparently it's not actually that bad on petrol - and is much safer than a Corsa.

BUT - on the otherhand your Mum really should have talked you to first

The point was that I need a car during the day so I can drop dd off at nursery while dh is at work. I also plan to go back to work myself soon. They always do things like this.

I agree MM about the politeness aspect.....I just said "well perhaps we should first consider petrol, insurance etc" didnt even say no!!!

Usually I have to go along with whatever "help" they are trying to give otherwise I'm an ungrateful so and so. Once my mother flooded my bathroom trying to fix a blocked toilet. I told her not to keep on flushing it and she ignored me.......then when I was cross because she'd flooded the bloody bathroom she said I was ungrateful because she was trying to help!