Boyfriend said something disturbing

[spottedpjs]

I changed name for this and would love responses especially from people who watches / likes movies showing an apocalyptic world

We were talking about The Walking Dead. He watched a few years ago and I’m just watching now.

So I asked him if he was leaving in a word like TWD:

• Would he kill any zombies? He said yes
• Would he lie, cheat, deceive, kill any humans so he can get their supplies? He said yes if he wanted to keep / thought it was worth keep surviving

• Would he kill a baby? He said yes because they are easy to kill and are just there doing nothing
• Would he eat the baby? He said yes, it would taste like veal

If you don’t know, there is a baby in TWD and people go to great lenghts to protect her and help her survive so his answers were very shocking and disturbing to me even though we were talking about something that is totally not real and will never ever happen

What does it say about his personality?

And to ask some questions in advance: he has no children, doesn’t show any signs of violence, has his life together and a good job, good social life, comes from a normal family and as far as I know has never been involved in anything bad, unlawful.
He seemed well adjusted until now.

I know him for nearly 2 years and live separately.

People will be shocked and horrified by this, but it's actually very sensible, if completely unemotional.

Similar behaviours were common in human communities in the past - for example, exposing babies and the elderly to die in times of famine, because what you need for the tribe to survive is strong healthy people of reproductive age who can contribute to gathering food, helping with building and defence, and then, when the famine times end, to building up the population again.

We live in much softer times now so people are horrified by it, but it makes a lot of sense, practically.

Also it's a complete hypothetical, and I don't believe it says anything about his personality. You have no idea whether he would do that in fact if it were to happen, probably not. And he might well have just said it to shock you, or taking it as a complete hypothetical, rather than deeply visualising killing and eating a baby. I think you're massively overthinking it.

@WrylyAmused

Thank you for your thoughtful response

I think I’m biased because in TWD the baby is surviving alright (obviously fiction) and it is a source of hope and joy for the group (obviously fiction)

Is it any different from ethics experiments like The Trolley Problem or watching something like The Hunger Games which is riven with moral issues, including child killing? You asked a highly hypothetical question and got a highly hypothetical answer. Also, unless you are a trained psychologist and asking very specific questions designed to elicit intellectual responses then I suspect you are looking for red flags where none exist. I might be worried if you were talking about actual political situations, but you’re not. I’ve been known to play ‘Shag, Marry, Kill’ in my time… didn’t actually want any of them dead!

How does he know a baby tastes like veal? Hmmm.....

I think I'd be a bit put off - surely the whole point of the baby storyline is the group trying to maintain hope, humanity and the future of the species?

Also, my ex always used to make the most morally bankrupt choices in these kind of hypotheticals (ever played Scruples?) and at the time I dismissed it as him being silly/edgy. But actually why would you aspire to be being seen like that? I'd see it as a red flag these days.

I think most human groups prioritise their young, it's an inbuilt instinct. So I disagree with pp that we would eat babies in nature. The elderly I think maybe, they could be a drain on the group. But the young will soon be of hunting age, makes no sense

Ask a disturbing question and you'll get a disturbing answer.

You sound like someone that would fall out with their partner because you had a dream they were unfaithful or something. I'd be more worried about you than your partner if that's how you responded to a totally made up scenario that could never actually happen in any version of life. It's so ridiculous that only a ridiculous response is warranted.

I think you are massively overthinking an entirely fictional and fantastical scenario to which he gave relatively shallow / flippant answers.

This is like the tiktok trend that caused loads of couples to fall out. The woman asks the man if he'd still love her if she was a worm and his response often caused rows.

" yes because it would taste like veal". I suspect he was pulling your leg and not taking your questions seriously, as most people wouldn't. Perhaps you need to see it from a dark humour side. Armchair theory is nothing like reality, you are probably reading too much into it. Unless there is a backstory, and he has shown a lack of empathy and selfishness over the 2 years of knowing him. Not worth time thinking about it otherwise as its insignificant.

Other people’s babies tend to be less important to men than their own.

Many women will protect any child. Men can be a bit more targeted.

I would focus on how he treats animals and his awareness of the vulnerability of other people. If he’s unsympathetic about women walking alone at night, or doesn’t worry about a lone child, or care for a sick/lost animal, that’s when I’d get the red flag bunting out!

He's completely wrong, babies* taste like chicken.

(*all humans taste like chicken, allegedly)

I thought it was pork - "long pig".

Pork, apparently. That's why (allegedly and hundreds of years ago) cannibals once referred to white people as 'long pig'.

Serves me right for watching all those historical documentaries on the Yesterday channel.

Oh-er, I'm wrong! Bit of googling says veal and/or pork. Sorry.

I think you never really know what you would do until your in that situation.

My DH would kill me, i'm good with that

What does it say about him? That he's in a relationship with someone who takes dumb throw away comments about absurd not-going-to-happen situations way too seriously.

I asked my DH that he said he would cut me in half so he could have a threesome. I occasionally when seeing a worm point at it and say "Sorry I can't be her"

I'd go along with your fella on this and would do the same. It's about survival, I would kill to save myself or dh, no problem and eat flesh. I'm a vegan but human wouldn't bother me as a last reort. Would never eat animal flesh or fish though.

Yes! I get put off when people say 'I would have done xyz', implying that they'd be the hero in a crisis situation that they've never encountered before.

This is a very interesting thought experiment thread btw OP, I like it!

It's just a fantasy scenario. He doesn't know how he'd behave if an apocalypse happened. Most likely he wouldn't have the guts to harm a baby. Sounds like a typical bloke being all mouth and trousers.

😂 sorry I can't be her 😂 😂

I wouldn't be a hero, not interested in that, I'm just selfish.

Awful lot of tolerant people here. Personally his responses would give me the willies.

I'd at last like to think I'd retain some morality in a situation like that. Of course hunger/fear etc can make us do brutal things.

If the baby cried and alerted zombies for example, putting myself others risk, I'd probably abandon it to its fate. I suppose killing it might be a kindness but, I don't think I could do that.

Eating it, however...what the fuck is wrong with him!?

The ease of his statements are worrying.

In an apocalypse i would want to be the best person I could because, each day might be my last. I would prioritise looking out for myself but, not by hurting others. I wouldn't want to die a bad person.

I'd want my partner to be that kind of person too. Who could take string action when needed. But not at the expense of his soul.

The ease of which your partner states he wpuld basically become an animal and wouldn't try to fight darker impulses...implies to me he already IS animalistic.