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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Are there are any very short women in happy relationships with short men?

140 replies

Whitsta90 · 06/12/2024 22:01

A very popular topic posted many times on this site, but I was wondering if there are any below average height women who are in happy relationships with men who are also below average, or maybe just about average height. I [M, single-approaching mid 30s, single and at the point where I'd like to settle down with someone],I have noticed quite a strong point made in these kind of threads both here and elsewhere, that aside from the obvious general consensus that women are more attracted to taller men, that usually the women who are most biased where this is concerned are much smaller height women.

My main reason for asking is that I am a slighter build and shorter height man-just 5'7'', so I guess I can be classed as quite short, not super short but well outside the famous 6'' height range preference-Who does have quite a thing for very height small women, however quick disclaimer, I am perfectly open to dating women of all height ranges and build and have been attracted to a very wide variety of women[tall/short/curvy/chubby/skinny]. I tend to be most attracted to faces more than body where the physical side of things is concerned, and then its all about personality which I'm finding makes a huge difference now I've reached the age I have. However I have very often been attracted to smaller than average women, so it would be nice to hear if there are any women of this description that are married/in relationships with guys of my stature, mainly because I so often typically see it written how women like this are more often than not, less attracted to guys of my physical description -[Not sure if I mentioned it but I'm slim build as well unfortunately, so another disadvantage😂]-Would be nice to hear if a few real life instances exist, just to give a little ray of hope that regardless of who I do manage to hopefully attract, I might have a least a bit of a chance with smaller women as well😂

OP posts:
Julia34 · 06/12/2024 22:04

Yes I know some short pairs when both shorter that me . I am 5'5. They seem happy together

TipsyJoker · 06/12/2024 22:11

I’m married but my husband is around 5ft 11 and I am 5ft 2. However, his height wasn’t what I was attracted to. We connected on an emotional level and our values are in line. Of course I find him very handsome but it’s not to do with his height and if he has been shorter, it wouldn’t have been a problem to me. The right woman will love you as you are. I think men worry more about height then women to tbh. If you’re funny, you’ll be able to punch well above your weight.

Lighteningstrikes · 06/12/2024 22:13

Beauty comes from within.

5.7 female here and I always liked tall men, until I met the love of my life, who was the same height as me.

I would swap character, intelligence, kindness and calmness over height EVERY time.

You’ll be fine 😊

AsparagusGirl · 06/12/2024 22:13

5'7 isn't that small. It's the same height as my husband and me 😀
So I don't think I am short, but do accept he is below average height for a man, but also don't care! He also doesn't care if I wear heels and am taller etc.

Julia34 · 06/12/2024 22:14

AsparagusGirl · 06/12/2024 22:13

5'7 isn't that small. It's the same height as my husband and me 😀
So I don't think I am short, but do accept he is below average height for a man, but also don't care! He also doesn't care if I wear heels and am taller etc.

5'7 is taller that me for sure 😅

marshmallowfinder · 06/12/2024 22:16

I'm 4ft 11, and my ex-husband was 5ft 7. It was so nice to be with a man of that height. I can't be doing with tall men as it's really awkward for me! I always thought it was a great height for a man. Never thought of him as short at all. Perfectly good medium height.

TomatoSandwiches · 06/12/2024 22:16

The happiest couples I know are actually similar heights and the two most long standing and happy are couples where the woman is an inch or so taller.

DancingFerret · 06/12/2024 22:16

I'm 5'1" and DH 5'6" and I can honestly say I've never thought about our respective heights until I read your post - and we've been married for years.

PortaSix · 06/12/2024 22:20

The 3 short guys im friends with are with absolute tall goddesses! My best friend is 5ft11, well over 6ft in heels (which she often wears) and her husband is 5ft6. Just own it, be secure. Confidence is sexy.

Peoplearebloodyidiots · 06/12/2024 22:29

Op, when I was younger and immature I had a pathetic rule that I would only date guys over a certain height. I ended up marrying a man who is shorter than you and he is lovely and we have an excellent time together. I don't care about his height at all, I care about how he makes me feel. There is definitely hope for you and I'm sorry that society can really suck in this way.

HermitCrabby · 06/12/2024 22:36

I am 5ft. DH is probably 5.6”. I have never measured him. I actively prefer short men. There are excellent practical reasons for this.

ellabella2345 · 06/12/2024 22:37

Sorry couldn’t read that far how ridiculous that someone would t be happy due to height 😂😂😂
myself and my OH are both 5’3 and happy

TheDogsMother · 06/12/2024 22:38

We're both 5ft 3 and very happy. If I had let any hang ups about height get in the way I would have missed out on the kindest, funny, romantic man ever. There is absolutely only one downside and that is that neither of us can reach the things on the tall shelves.

girljulian · 06/12/2024 22:39

My best friend's parents are 5'0 (her) and 5'3 (him). You are not that short at 5'7! Especially if you're really 5'7. It's just that lots of men who are really 5'7 say they're 5'10, and lots of men who are 5'10 say they're 6'0.

Netcam · 06/12/2024 22:40

I'm 5'3, DH is 5'6. Together 12 years, 2nd marriage for both of us, we're both 54 now and still very attracted to each other. I've never really considered him short as he always looks taller than me. We fit together nicely. We're both slim too.

greywolfie · 06/12/2024 22:40

Watch some Russ Meyer. Embrace it!

Goody2ShoesAndTheFilthyBeast · 06/12/2024 22:41

I'm 5 ft 2 and my husband is 5ft 8 and we are very happy.

girljulian · 06/12/2024 22:41

Oh, also -- I honestly don't understand how tiny women make relationships work with tall men. I'm 5'5 and I find it uncomfortable just walking and talking with my 6 foot work bestie; I can't even imagine how annoying it would be to try and shag him.

InWithThePlums · 06/12/2024 22:41

Of course there are, look around you! Mad to think otherwise. So many things factor in to attraction.

SereneCapybara · 06/12/2024 22:41

DS is only 5'5 due to childhood illness. His girlfriend is six foot and often wears heels. They have been together for 18 months and recently moved in together. Two previous girlfriends have been taller than him and two shorter or same height.

I don't think of 5'7 as short in a man. Your height might matter to some women but not to loads of women. Don't fixate on it. Easy self confidence is what attracts women. And zest for life - energy and humour.

Whitsta90 · 06/12/2024 22:43

girljulian · 06/12/2024 22:39

My best friend's parents are 5'0 (her) and 5'3 (him). You are not that short at 5'7! Especially if you're really 5'7. It's just that lots of men who are really 5'7 say they're 5'10, and lots of men who are 5'10 say they're 6'0.

Thank you, i'm aware guys lie about they're heights online often, and yes I am 5'7'', in fact I openly admit I am actually very nearly but just off😂I think i'm about 5'6 and a bit but I round it up to 5'7'' as the difference is so small its not really noticeable

OP posts:
SereneCapybara · 06/12/2024 22:44

TomatoSandwiches · 06/12/2024 22:16

The happiest couples I know are actually similar heights and the two most long standing and happy are couples where the woman is an inch or so taller.

Reading your post, I just realised - my mum was taller than my dad by an inch or so, and DH's mum was way taller than his dad. Both devoted couples for decades until death separated them.

Whitsta90 · 06/12/2024 22:51

Peoplearebloodyidiots · 06/12/2024 22:29

Op, when I was younger and immature I had a pathetic rule that I would only date guys over a certain height. I ended up marrying a man who is shorter than you and he is lovely and we have an excellent time together. I don't care about his height at all, I care about how he makes me feel. There is definitely hope for you and I'm sorry that society can really suck in this way.

I think the height preference thing is a lot more prolific with teen girls/very young women in they're early 20s, likely due firstly to that being the age when your at your most superficial [i admit i was guilty of that too!] and also being heavily influenced by the social media expectations that have become so big recently, this obsession with height seems to have exploded in the last few years since social media has become as big as it has, i'm sure i don't remember it being mentioned anything like as much as it is now 15 or 20 years ago...

OP posts:
IAmInTheBath · 06/12/2024 22:52

My parents are 5'4" and 5'1. They are extremely happy. I am 5'4" and once dated a 6ft man, it gives you neck ache. 5'7" isn't short.

ariaknox · 06/12/2024 22:56

Im 5"5
Husband is 5"4
8 years married very happy