Question for men

[SnugCoralFinch]

I saw a thread on fb - basically many men thinking women have a ton of options, and a roster apparently.

Was just wondering if this is a common view? Myself and a lot of women I know are long term single and cba with dating apps etc. I’m not sure how many women genuinely have a whole bunch of fantastic options? 🤷‍♀️

So my question is I guess, is this something you believe yourself?

This is a belief that has a grain of truth. For the overwhelming majority of women it is demonstrably false, for a very small percentage of young women (guess under 25) it is true. This tiny group of highly attractive, young, vivacious women are the stuff of endless youtube / tiktok / other cesspit social media. You could try saying NAWALT - but I think it would fall on deaf ears.

Is it easier for a woman to pull a man, any man? Probably, yes. Is it easier for a woman to find an available man actually worth pulling though?

I believe there's an idea that sex and dating for women is far easier than it is for men, especially OLD. I've also heard this from women, that it's easy to get laid if you're a woman. In one sense yes, you could go to a bar give some sleaze the come hither and pull but if you want a quality experience, it's a lot harder.

I suppose there are men who don't believe dating is easier for women than it is for men.

I can only say I have never met one of them.

I think this is it - they seem to think there’s a ton of amazing options out there which in my experience anyway just hasn’t been the case 😂

I mean yes, it wouldn’t be hard to find sex - but you’re right the quality experience won’t be 😂 and I’m not interested in a random hook up.

This is a standard incel trope, having little bearing on the real world, but beloved of the Very Online people. Ignore.

Yes, there are tonnes of options out there. Amazing ones, less so as they get snapped up early. Ones you'd actually consider as a partner, even less so.

If you're just after a quick fuck to scratch an itch then yes, dick is plentiful.

Red pill men creep me out and also make me laugh.
They are idiots.

Number one thing to remember is that when men talk about women, they mean the attractive women.
They don’t mean ugly women like me.
Good looking women live very different lives - they could actually have a roster, they don’t live by the same rules that the rest of us live by.

Signed Ugly woman, whose never even been an a date, bever mind have a ’roster’.

@LonelySingleNameChangeBecauseItsEmbarrassing makes a good point, most women are just part of the furniture to men unless they have a narrow range of characteristics that makes them desirable as partners. We remain useful for other purposes of course: cleaning, caring, fucking, childrearing, but they wouldn't show us off to their online 'friends'.

ok let’s take both OLD real world scenarios:

OLD - if you’re a woman; no matter how attractive you are you will have plenty of options and multiple messages a day. Granted, quality might not be great, but if you wanted sex, you could probably go and have it the same day if you really wanted to.

if your a man, unless you are good looking, over 6ft tall and ooze charisma, your options will be limited and you may only get a few matches a week. Can a guy easily obtain sex the same way like a woman can? Absolutely not!

in real world scenarios, it’s a little different. However, it is still easier for woman. If a woman goes up to 10 single guys in a bar and asks to sleep with them, I’d suggest at least half would say yes. If a guy did the same, possibly one might and the other 9 would probably throw their drink over him.

if we are taking sex out of the equation and looking at purely long term partners then I think it is much more equal, as men can be just as selective as woman when it comes to finding a partner, just not so much when it is purely sex.

OLD - if you’re a woman; no matter how attractive you are you will have plenty of options and multiple messages a day.

Any evidence of that?

From a man's perspective...

I suppose the thing that sticks out for me is that women talk about having sex when they're single as though it's something they can just go and do. As a man I've only ever had sex in relationships. I don't know where all this easily available sex is for single people to casually enjoy as and when they happen to feel like it, but I've never been able to find any.

Also, everything that Londonguy84 said above. Agree with all that.

Incels are 4s who are angry because 8s won’t date them.

A couple of good looking confident male friends of mine who are single have no problem finding women who want to just get laid.

Incels are misogynists who hate women. Doubt they care much about dates, they tend to be into taking hostages and rape. Some of them have murdered people.

Yes.

True, but many people who aren’t Incels have also murdered people…

That's true and water is wet.

Personally think regardless of which sex you are old is pretty dire except perhaps for the top 10% of lookers who get to pick and choose who they wish.

I do think though there are probably more shit men out there than women so it is more difficult for them to find a man who is relationship material!

What do you mean more shit men? If you mean in terms of looks alone, im not sure if I agree.

I think there are more 9’s and 10’s women than men, but I also think there are more 5 and below women than men. I think there are far more ‘average looking’ men on OLD and that’s where the issue is for men, if you are one of the 85% average looking men you don’t Have much hope!

Perhaps where these blokes are going wrong is assigning numbers to people instead of looking at the whole person. Attractiveness is subjective and people become more attractive (or less) as you get to know them.

Many women complain that the men contacting them haven't bothered to read their profile and don't try to get to know them.

So that's a no then.

So this is a topic of conversation that came up between me and some friends. So to kind of test the theory one of the couples decided to put a profile on tinder for each of them. They both used 3 pics which we all thought were good pics. They both used much the same wording as well. They are both in their early 50's too.

The woman got 300 messages within 24 hrs, the man got 6.

No one was really surprised as we all think its easier for a woman to walk into a bar and walk out with someone if she wanted to. Men aren't fussy and think with their you know what.

The real question is are any of them people you would want to be with long term? probably not... but the option is there if you want it.

See above.

And your argument for attractiveness being subjective is flawed when talking about OLD.

OLD is solely about first impressions ie looks for nearly all men whereas its deeper with woman. Hence why a woman will get more matches, more likes and more messages OLD.