Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Please help me. I'm a regular and I've just kicked out my husband....but gawd, I love him so much,,,

89 replies

pacificqueen · 11/04/2008 22:41

but he totally betrayed my trust tonight and I don't know if I can forgive him

I have no family. My friends are everything to me. And tonight, he sat down and admitted he had read all my emails to my closest friends and I feel betrayed. though I NEVER said anything that would put him down, I did disclose certain personal information and he was a tad upset but I am more upset at my trust being betrayed. Why did he feel the need to do this? I love him but my friends are SO important to me as they are all I have and I like to think that what I say to them stays with them iyswim.

OP posts:
pacificqueen · 11/04/2008 23:04

god, thankyou morningpaper

he's in the hotel. He's just texted me. I love him. He loves me. But this is a MASSIVE problem for him and he needs to sort it out. I CANNOT cope with huge jealously issues. I just can't. Mainly because I am the most unjealous person on the planet and can't 'get' where this all comes from. Do you know what I mean?

He didn't look at my posts. I couldn't care about posts on here. He looked at my personal emails. To my mates. Where I discussed stuff that was personal to me.

OP posts:
B1977 · 11/04/2008 23:04

Sorry to hear you are having a rough time. Would you feel up to inviting him back and booking Relate or similar?

BoysAreLikeDogs · 11/04/2008 23:04

Ring him, apologise and talk to him

I for one, think you have overreacted.

Can I ask, male or female friend?

kama · 11/04/2008 23:04

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

soph28 · 11/04/2008 23:05

I'm not sure why you are getting so angry with MN.

It's not nice to have your trust betrayed but it sounds as though he knows he was wrong and was sorry. Kicking him out seems really extreme. I have read some of dh's texts/emails out of curiosity but not because I suspect anything. Think he has probably read some of mine too. It wouldn't realoly bother me if he did unless I was trying to hide something.

pacificqueen · 11/04/2008 23:08

oh lapin, I know that full well my love (about people not agreeing 100%).

It's just that I feel maybe I could have helped assuage his fears but I also feel I am not in a relationship to completely 'give myself over' to someone else. I.e. not have any friends, never go out with someone else (i.e. even female friends etc.) without having him, on my return home, give me the fucking nth degree about what I've been up to. I've never been unfaithful, I NEVER WOULD, but I cannot do ANTHING ANYTHING without him getting the hump iyswim.

OP posts:
morningpaper · 11/04/2008 23:08

I do know what you mean, I would also find this EXTREMELY hard because I am a very unjealous person too. Jealously is usually more about low self-esteem which is a whole other bucket of crap.

Was he contrite about looking? I don't understand why he admitted it, but also had a go at you?

He needs to understand that you deserve privacy and it is really important to you. Does he trust you?

susiecutiebananas · 11/04/2008 23:09

Oh lord. HOrrible situation all round really. A bit of a mess.

He has admitted to you that he did it, which was probably not easy to do. He obviously is incredibly insecure. Kicking him out, is not going to help that feeling at all. I understand how you feel about being betrayed. But really, it is not actually that terrible a thing to do, is it. In the big scheme of life, it just is not that bad.

you both have huge issues going on here. You have discussed things about your relationship to friends, but not with him, in the first place. This in itself needs addressing really. You are not being open with him, which I suspect he was aware of, and hence feeling the need to look.

The feeling of jealousy can be such a horrible, consuming, irrational feeling. It literally eats you up, and makes you feel quite ill at times. It is horrible to feel jealous, with or without justification for it. Its a vile emotion to experience, on either end of it. None the less, it can e quite uncontrollable if you are the one feeling jealous. Its based on in security, almost without exception. You should try and understand that a little better. Trust me, you do not choose to feel jealous.

He really seems to have some serious security issues with you, that need discussing. Not having him there, is not going to solve these problems.

I think you ought to call him, calmly and ask him why he felt he had to do this... tell him to come home and talk! Don't let your marriage be over, over this, he's your husband, he deserves more than this, more of a chance to explain, to talk, to understand your reasons for being secretive.

Seriously, think about this one, why did he need to find out stuff for himself? Why did you not talk to him?

It is a invasion of privacy, however, you share your lives together, surely, there shouldn't be such huge secret things between you. It not entirely healthy imo...

I'm terribly insecure myself. I never would look into my DH phone, email etc, mainly as I do actually trust him, but more because, I'd Hate to ever find anything, in the way I did with my ex husband. I wasn't even looking for anything with my ex, but came across it anyway. he was having an affair. It devastated me, and I swore I'd never ever want to find anything accidentally or intentionally again.

sorry, i've gone on a tad, I just can't help thinking that it was a bad move to kick him out, that it will not help thigs at all, infact will make him worse.

I think you ought to get him to come back, and make it tonight if possible.

pacificqueen · 11/04/2008 23:09

yes, he was contrite mp. But he admits he has huge jealously problems but also admits that he will never be able to change.

I cannot even call my best mate (all my main friends are female) without him getting the hump.

OP posts:
NorthernLurker · 11/04/2008 23:10

Right so it's not actually about the e-mail at all. ok - well sounds like there are many things to work out - but you need him back in the house to do that so RING HIM NOW. Don't text - TALK to him. Good Luck!

morningpaper · 11/04/2008 23:10

It sounds grim pacificqueen

And I think a firm Kicking Out policy is not the worst thing in the world

You need some space, that's fair enough IMO.

How are you going to move forward? Have you considered counselling or couple's counselling?

pacificqueen · 11/04/2008 23:11

no no no no no

I have discussed EVERYTHING with him before anything with friends, whatever it is about. I would NEVER never discuss something with my friends about dh without broaching it with him first. I would never do that.

I'm not a bloody horrendous person, I promise you that.

It's just that he cannot BEAR me talking to my mates.

OP posts:
pacificqueen · 11/04/2008 23:13

I don't know MP.

I don't know where to go from here. I really don't.

Do you think couples counselling is the way?Not sure I could manage it tbh. I'd be crap in counselling. Would be wanting to tell everyone to fuck off .

OP posts:
morningpaper · 11/04/2008 23:13

He sounds wildly insecure and it's no way to live

He needs a GOOD THERAPIST

pixiepip · 11/04/2008 23:13

I can't understand why he's left! A lot of blokes would refuse to be kicked out! You have still not explained how he was able to read your emails. If it was that important to you that he didn't see, how did it happen? His behaviour is not right- but then, you seem to have issues that you need to confront and deal with too, if this type of behaviour upsets you so much. Anger management maybe?

littlelapin · 11/04/2008 23:13

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

PaninoPan · 11/04/2008 23:13

pq - I too have a thing about privacy, not so much mine, but other peoples. I do have a mountainously high threshold over which something must go before I would compromise privacy. Your dh may not be like that, and you may be shocked he read your mails, BUT,

if he is insecure (to which you could only marginally contribute) he sure will be now after being aware of the stuff you have written. What you think is non-judgemental and neutral may be embarassingly incriminating and red hot to him. Especially IF he knows there are probs. with the sex bit. You'd have to think like a man to know this.

He will feel highly betrayed - people outside your el. know of 'issues' and he is unaware of them knowing. He will be feeling highly embarassed when he sees them next.

and the notion of you having no-one else to vent to doesn't make you bomb-proof to the suggestion that perhaps you have been massively indiscreet about things. IMVHO.

morningpaper · 11/04/2008 23:15

I think counselling is something to discuss

Relate are quite helpful - they will assess you and tell you if they think you need individual therapy or counselling first

(Me and DH have been to 400 counsellors and therapists )

You love him, you want to be with him: that's the main thing. I really think that the rest can be worked on but it is really hard to do it yourselves. I've always found counselling REALLY helpful, particularly in relationship situations.

Elephantsbreath · 11/04/2008 23:15

OMG _ I say all sorts of stuff to my friends IN CONFIDENCE about my relationship. I would really not necessarily want my dp listening at the door as it were. To have it written down in email form for your dh to read is just a shame. I don't blame you btw and, oh dear, I really feel for you, but it's a reminder to us all to use password protection and treat these types of communications like a locked diary.

Meanwhile, well you love him don't you, so I'm sure you can use this exposure of your private thoughts to advantage and improve your marriage. He probably feels embarrassed, and maybe you don't feel like answering questions about your private thoughts you've expressed to your closest friends, but I bet you can get over this quickly.

Oh I agree the is a silly judgey reaction to you.

pacificqueen · 11/04/2008 23:15

oh god, I have no temper left. I got rid of that on my madly horrendous family.

LOL at a good therapist.

How do I get rid of his insecurity? I've never discussed anything that would upset him. I've never painted him in anything than a fucking brilliant light. And even he admitted that. He just didn't like the fact that I had even talked about him and you cannot tell me that NONE of you have ever talked about your dhs with your mates?

The problems is I feel the onus is on me now to make it work but why should it be that way?

OP posts:
madamez · 11/04/2008 23:16

SOunds like there's a lot more going on here - certainly stuff I don't know about. Because on the one hand, kicking him out of the house sounds like a radical over-reaction: that's what you do to someone who has assaulted you or whose stash of kiddie-abuse-pics you've just discovered. On the other hand, living with someone who is very, very jealous and insecure, who snoops all the time and interrogates you and basically won't let you have any privacy, is horrible and would make most people snap sooner or later. So if you have been dealing with the latter for a long time, I can sort of see why you felt you had to kick him out. Because he is, after all, an adult, and if he is unreasonably jealous and regularly invades your privacy, then it's time he did something to fix his jealousy, it's not good enough for him to go 'boohoo, I can't help being a paranoid nosy controlling pain in the arse, it's just the way I am.'

Sorry you are having such a rotten time. If you know that he has somewhere to sleep tonight ie mate's house or hotel, then you go and get some sleep and arrange to meet him and talk in the morning.

littlelapin · 11/04/2008 23:17

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BoysAreLikeDogs · 11/04/2008 23:18

Ah there are other, deeper things going on that have been brought to a head by the sound of it.

He sounds a bit controlling, TBH, and I understand your need to connect to others, one person cannot fulfil all one's needs

Good luck

pacificqueen · 11/04/2008 23:18

oh god Pan, you are so right.

And yes, it is issues of that ilk. But I need to talk to SOMEONE and my mates are the best thing. I never dissed him Pan. I was trying to help someone else and in doing so, mentioned something that we had overcome together. And yes I can understand why he didn't like that. But he threw it in my face and said it was unreasonable. And I feel bad but I also feel sad iykwim.

Oh gawd, what a mess.

OP posts:
morningpaper · 11/04/2008 23:20

Emails are private and of COURSE friends discuss their realtionships and vent - blimey barely 10 minutes passes without one or other of my mummy frineds complaining about their husband's ineffective sex technique or boring fishing hobby

YOU can't make him insecure. He needs to look at the problems and sort them out himself.