I had a brief relationship with a man who ended it with me and I was crushed as I’d made it clear how much I liked him. We attend the same hobby group and know a lot of the same people. Before he ended it I pursued him as I couldn’t understand what was going on as he’d been so nice but then was so cold to me. It took a while but I managed to get out of him that he didn’t want to see me anymore and so although I felt very upset I left him alone. Looking back I think it was just an ego boost for him and nothing more. We have bumped into each other a few times since at our hobby group and it’s been civil, no drama or unpleasantness.
The painful thing for me is that he has clearly told some of his guy friends (that we both know) that I pursued him. I don’t think he has been honest about his side of things and that he led me on knowing he didn’t want a relationship with me. The reason I think this is because since this time three of the guys I know he is close friends with have acted differently around me- one keeps looking at me and smirks, another has asked me out - all are in long term relationships. It makes me wonder what they think of me?
I’m consumed with wondering what the hell he must have said about me. I’ll never know because if I ask him he will deny it and probably block me. I think I am the subject of gossip and humiliation in a social network I really cared about and went to regularly. It is ruining it for me and I’m struggling to stop thinking about the fact that these rumours about me will never go away. I don’t want to leave the group but don’t know how to feel better about it. I wish I knew what’s been said but I don’t think I can know. Anyone else heard gossip like this? What did you think of the other person? How can I handle it? This is hurting me so much.