Ex wants to meet up

[Frappy123]

My ex of 2 years recently asked if I wanted to have dinner. I agreed. This comes after I reached out to him a year or so ago ( he ended things) to see if we could meet. My intentions being to try again. He agreed to talk via text first and ultimately decided not to meet me and ended it with he will always have feelings for me, wished me the best etc. It was at that moment I finally decided to let go and move past this, got myself into counseling and was doing great. Until 4 months ago he sends a random text, just a link to an article about something he clearly knew I'd know about (my fav golfer being disqualified) with a laughing emoji. I ignored it. WTH? You told me you didn't want to see me. Well in May we started talking a bit, just light conversation and not often. He's now asked me to dinner. He said he's excited to see me and catch up. What does that even mean? I still love him. Catching up and parting ways will be hard for me. It would be too hard for me to be friends also. Ugh. Confused.

Rather than trying to work out what he wants from this or what it could mean I would think about what it means to you. If it will be too hard for you to go through feeling hurt again then I wouldn't put yourself in that position. But easier said than done I know :)

Why did you break up?

If he is paying go for it free dinner lol

I don’t want to hurt your feelings as you clearly still love your ex but it seems to me like whatever he had going on (perhaps a relationship?) is over and he’s come back to you because you are an easy option. He knows you still love him and he’s using that to maybe give his ego a boost.

The fact that you literally had to have counselling to move past this relationship tells me that it hurt you very deeply. Please don’t fall back into this. It’s not worth it. You deserve way better than someone who keeps you on the back burner and plays with your emotions. Block him and find yourself someone who values you.

All the best.

I wouldn't personally. He knows you want him and he knows he holds all the power. Who does he think he is, breaking your heart and then casually texting a random link and dinner invitations two years later? If he'd messaged you to say he'd made a huge mistake, apologised and explained why he ended things, hmm, maybe (but even then...), but he hasn't. He's just lazily shuffling himself back into your life because he knows he can. And then there's the why. Unfortunately the most likely explanation is because there's been a breakup, he's bored and lonely, and needs an in-between emotional and sexual support human.

This is already causing you pain. Don't give him the opportunity to break your heart all over again, walk away.

Best case scenario is that he thinks you’re over him and you can now be friends. Worst case scenario is that his current relationship has ended and he enjoys the attention/chance of a shag from you. The third option is that he wants to get back with you, but given what happened, is that really in your best interests?

I think you need to say to him what you’ve said here “catching up and parting ways will be hard for me. It would be too hard for me to be friends also.” And see what he says.

Protect yourself. Don't go and cease all contact.

Regardless of his intentions - you know how much this will hurt.

Be strong, don't go and block him

Booty call. Don’t do it.

You deserve better ..

This man had 2 chances ..

you say you still love him.. you are opening yourself up to a whole load of hurt

I'd say don't go.
You have no idea what his intentions are. You're not in a place of open communication, so you can't ask him. And even if you did ask, you'd have no way of knowing if he was being upfront and truthful.

There's way too much going on here beneath the surface. It's a recipe for disaster.

Thank you. I appreciate you taking the time to respond.
too hard for sure. I know where this goes, like every other time.

Thank you so much. I appreciate your input. What you say is true, he’s taking advantage because he knows how I feel and he’s bored or something else ended. He’s also all over the dating sites once again. I had a feeling. Easy to check without signing up and the 1st 3 I looked at, there he was. I will not meet up with him.

Does it matter what he wants?
he dumped you. Then a year later you tried to get back with him and he played hot and cold, before rejecting you again
and now he’s back in your life 2 years on and you’re like yep let’s do this. this is the kindof love i deserve, conditional intermittent love from someone completely uncommitted to me.
why do you still love him? Are you sure you do? Or do you want to just fix the cycle of rejection so you feel better? Or you just haven’t found anyone better in 2 years so it seems worth the risk? Don’t look for love or your self worth in someone so fickle. Figure out why you’re remotely interested in this prospect, what he wants is irrelevant. Good luck

I appreciate you taking the time to respond. Thank you! You are soooo right, he holds the power and he knows it. What an awful thing to realize. To do that to someone you supposedly wanted to spend your life with, yet dumps me more than once and now wants to “catch up”. Yep, I’m most likely an in-between. I will never understand how he could do this to me. But I can’t take it again, or anymore.

I’m most likely an in-between.
this is such a hard thing to realise, but so so important you know it says more about him than you. Well done for being strong
you don’t deserve to be treated like that

And why did you want the cheat back?

Priest Adu can take his spells elsewhere.

I would like to thank Ag Adu, as they push pineapple, shake the tree.

It says a lot about him. It’s hard to be strong. I just can’t go back to ground zero. I was doing well and just this has set me back some.
thank you again!

It shouldn’t matter what he wants. Embarrassingly, he dumped me more than once. I feel like such a fool. What you spell out here reads true. I’ve never been like this with any other relationship. I’ve worked so hard with my therapist to get through it and BAM! Maybe he really is narcissistic. I’ve never know anything about it until going to therapy. She thinks he is, to a degree, with the manipulation and a couple other things. Anyway, I’m rambling. Thank you for your response. It means a lot that people take the time to read and reply.

Lol, sorry. I have already responded to you. Please ignore me, it’s early 😂

Just block him OP, is there any reason you haven't?

@Dontbeme 🤣