When do family members become too old to drive your children.

[Thereisalwaysanothertime]

Mil is about to turn 80. She drives a small car and is still happy to drive. But will avoid motorways etc.
I haven’t been in her car for a long time, but she will sometimes pick the children up and take them back to her house. This is on fast road and then down country lanes about 40 mins away.
She is getting older but still fairly mobile. But I’m starting to think that I no longer want my children to be driven by her. They are my responsibility and I don’t feel comfortable with them being driven around by an 80 year old anymore. Is it time to call it a day on these lifts even though nothing specific has happened yet.

I'm not she is the determining factor.

Certainly ability to drive is. Some 80 yo will be better than some 70yo.

And some of the people I see causing danger on the motorway at 50mph is a central lane are waaayyyyyyyy below 80.

Some looks 40/50's.

Twats

I do agree, however there are a million distractions when driving. I completely stand by my comment. A driver is either safe or they are not. There is no grey area.

@Thereisalwaysanothertime "but I think 80 is my cut off point for my children to travel with her."

Why?

I be a passenger before I stopped it. My FIL stopped having our youngest after my husband was driven by his Dad.

I be a passenger before I stopped it. My FIL stopped having our youngest after my husband was driven by his Dad.

Slightly off topic but those that have seen their parents drive recently, how did you do it?

My husband and I never have a need to go out with our parents in their car. We always drive ourselves when we meet up. How would we find a way to go out with them without it being obvious we wanted to assess them?

Because of all the additional risks associated with aging and driving. There is a reason insurance premiums go up in your 70s. And the demographic is the second highest risk of having an accident (number one being drivers under 22, hence their high premiums too). Older people have slower reflexes, poorer vision etc. And the average age for stopping driving by choice is around 75.
So although mil is comfortable driving and my dh says she is ok to drive on her own . Im
not sure I feel comfortable adding to that allowing my children to travel in the car with her down dual carriageways and country roads. Driving with children in the car is more challenging than driving on your own.

My BIL observed his PIL driving when driving behind them to an event. Would you ever have reason to be driving to the same place as them? You could drive in convoy.

My step dad is almost 80 and I've got no qualms about him driving my child

You keep saying that she's a safe driver so I can't see the problem

It feels a bit like you're looking for a reason

https://www.brake.org.uk/get-involved/take-action/mybrake/knowledge-centre/road-design/rural-roads
From this article it seems statistically that rural roads are the most dangerous however this is mainly due to speeding so if she's cautious and slow then potentially she's on the safer end of the spectrum. I'd get in the car with her and then decide.

fungipie as the cause, yes. But older people are physiologically and cognitively less likely to be able to respond promptly to the mistakes of others.

Why are you spending time asking anonymous posters when both you and your husband are in agreeance that you don’t want her to continue to drive the children alone