Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Top places exH sulked - can anyone top these! (semi-lighthearted!)

675 replies

heliosoftroy · 09/05/2024 12:00

Currently going through a divorce from my super sulker ex, and often find myself thinking, with incredulity, at some of the sulks soon-to-be-exH pulled in the most inopportune moments! Top sulk moments -

  • On a beach in the Florida Keys. Also a beach in Miami (separate occasion)
  • Sitting in the 3rd row of the stalls at Hamilton on Broadway
  • At my birthday dinner out in a fancy restaurant
  • All the way on a 3hr train journey to a romantic weekend away I planned for his birthday
  • The first Christmas I went to stay with his family
  • At Peppa Pig World in the very long queue for a ride
  • DC's birthday party
  • On a cruise in the middle of the Caribbean
  • Looking round wedding venues...

I'm sure there are more, but anyone got any crackers from sulking partners to make me feel better?!

OP posts:
Duckingella · 09/05/2024 23:13

heliosoftroy · 09/05/2024 12:00

Currently going through a divorce from my super sulker ex, and often find myself thinking, with incredulity, at some of the sulks soon-to-be-exH pulled in the most inopportune moments! Top sulk moments -

  • On a beach in the Florida Keys. Also a beach in Miami (separate occasion)
  • Sitting in the 3rd row of the stalls at Hamilton on Broadway
  • At my birthday dinner out in a fancy restaurant
  • All the way on a 3hr train journey to a romantic weekend away I planned for his birthday
  • The first Christmas I went to stay with his family
  • At Peppa Pig World in the very long queue for a ride
  • DC's birthday party
  • On a cruise in the middle of the Caribbean
  • Looking round wedding venues...

I'm sure there are more, but anyone got any crackers from sulking partners to make me feel better?!

Damn so many missed opportunities to yeet said sulky man into the sea/over a balcony/in front off daddy pigs car...............

MzHz · 09/05/2024 23:15

Every Christmas
every birthday

then he did it on our sons birthday

fucker. Immature, ratty little fucker

ex.

praise the lord 🤣

TheRealMamaLlama · 09/05/2024 23:15

My granddad's funeral 😪

Pieceofpurplesky · 09/05/2024 23:20

Sex scan for our DS - he already had a son and didn't want another. He no longer speaks to either (their choice).

When my dad bought the book for himself because he wanted it for Christmas and he felt my dad was ruining it for him by reading it (it was a football manager autobiography and hardly a secret)

When he was away with work for 4 days (abroad on a jolly) and at a football tournament with his mates for the following 4 days so DS and I went to stay with my parents - as he needed a break.

It was endless.

Tickytocky · 09/05/2024 23:55

Not DP but my mother -

Fortnight in an amazing resort in the Dominican Republic, she went in a massive huff and locked my dad out of their room for the first 4 nights and basically ignored all the family. We were scared to go to the buffet without her so barely ate, went to the pool but couldn’t enjoy it.

She still has a go at us year later that we went to the Michael Jackson night without her.

LadyHavelockVetinari · 10/05/2024 00:44

In the middle of a rainforest in Brazil, after three days of trekking. Finally arrived at a beautiful waterfall and he sulked because I was flirting with the guide (I wasn't, I exchanged a few pleasantries and accepted a clove cigarette from him as I had not tried them before). He sulked all the way out of the rainforest and threw my bag across the bus on the way back.

Fifteen years later and the list is truly comedic. He's sulked in islands. In restaurants. On rivers. At the beach. Up mountains. On birthdays. At Christmases.

Fathomless · 10/05/2024 05:49

This reply has been deleted

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster's request.

😄 🤣

Maytorain · 10/05/2024 06:05

EverybodyLTB · 09/05/2024 13:53

Danioyellow you cope with it by eventually getting divorced 😂

But what I think happens, is that they do it when you have not much choice to ditch them (in my case I was actually in labour, and many more) or you’re on a plane going to somewhere lovely, or at granny’s 70th. You have to grin and bear it as you can’t cause a scene or escape. Then they go back to normal and then you feel all jumbled up psychologically, the whiplash really messes with your perception. You know it’s awful, but they’re being nice now, what actually happened there again…. It really screws with your reality. For me a lot of my letting go of ridiculous sulks, was to skim over things for my kids, like I’m not going to get into a row with my sulking EXH at Disneyland! Then maybe at dinner he might start cheering up, after I’ve done all day being cheery for the kids and doing everything. I don’t know, you just get so worn down it’s exhausting, you’re just mentally clinging onto the non sulking moments.

I certainly couldn’t do it forever, though. You have your limits. The one too many times couldn’t be glossed over any more, and attempts to discuss and give ultimatums and requesting change amounted to nothing. I got divorced before no fault divorces were a thing. The list was longgggg!

Gosh this resonated with me.
It absolutely screws with your head. I think the term “sulk” Is far too mild. I called it silent treatment. Which is a form of abuse.
i divorced my miserable ex last year. It was very bitter and he still is hard work.

merrywidow · 10/05/2024 07:39

Ex in every restaurant because

Food wasn't hot enough
They add service charge
Too expensive
Table in wrong place
Anything he could think of.

I developed a sort of PTSD every time we went in a restaurant and found myself begging staff to make sure the food was hot enough for him.

The last restaurant meal we ever had just before I dumped him, I sat there in silence thinking we have got nothing to talk about and nothing in common and thought how ugly he looked. I drank three margaritas in quick succession.

TwoLeftSocksWithHoles · 10/05/2024 08:36

This reply has been deleted

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster's request.

That's a wizard idea.

Tripeandonions · 10/05/2024 08:47

This reply has been deleted

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster's request.

😂😂

crochetcatcrazy · 10/05/2024 08:50

I just remembered one.....

I had a day surgery, after he picked me up from the hospital and was annoyed it was earlier than expected/he wanted as he was on his way to buy a new playstation. He had reserved it at argos and needed to go and pick it up. I protested and said look I have had a general could I just go home and rest but he just parked up left me in the car got his precious new playstation and then we went home and he ignored me for days on this new toy whilst I was in recovery had to 100% look after myself.

GerbilsForever24 · 10/05/2024 09:17

Lots of examples here but ad the outsider watching the sulking behaviour, what really struck me with SIL was how she would bend over backwards to prevent it.... and still failed.

I remember her turning up at ours once in a right state. He had been sulking for 2 days or so at this point. Its a long story but basically, he had begrudingly agreed she could go for a quick post work drink with a colleague. But then transport collapsed and she didn't get home quick enough. He accused her of cheating. She sent proof of the collapse (one of those days where all trains just stopped running for a few hours), etc etx... and he still sulked for days.

Guess who never went for a drink with a colleague again?!

Boopydoo · 10/05/2024 09:55

Maytorain · 10/05/2024 06:05

Gosh this resonated with me.
It absolutely screws with your head. I think the term “sulk” Is far too mild. I called it silent treatment. Which is a form of abuse.
i divorced my miserable ex last year. It was very bitter and he still is hard work.

Me too, if any day out, event could be spoiled by him it would be, I became a former shadow of myself. It was sulking or raging and not much in between with a side serving of 'This is all your fault, don't you know what you did this time? You really are stupid'. I did eventually leave, and that was many years ago, but I still have PTSD around certain places and events. His adult children are now no contact as he made no effort at all with them and merrily tells everyone he meets it's all my fault the children won't talk to him. He has to have a mental illness, surely.

Outwiththenorm · 10/05/2024 10:46

DH is not a sulker thank god but these stories are bringing back suppressed memories of spending most of my teens trying to placate my sulking best friend. Half the time I had no idea what she was sulking about, sometimes it was because I’d spoken to another friend or looked at her the wrong way. The hours I wasted trying to get her back in a good mood until finally when I was 15 another friend said ‘why do you put up with that?’ It was a lightbulb moment.

GymPanda · 10/05/2024 11:52

I am on very good terms with my exDH who is thankfully not a sulker (just very very dull and a bit manipulative) but my exMIL is a narcissistic gaslighting bigoted sulker who I have not spoken to for 8 years now.

Like many PPs, I found that she sulked or had a strop when it was a special occasion or something important to me. Several times exDH would let her in on a surprise for me (sometimes because he wanted her to babysit) and she always spoiled it by telling me the surprise. On the morning of our wedding day she phoned me and told me the fancy hotel he'd booked for our wedding night 🙄

When she wasn't being a bitch, she pretended to be my biggest fan, always banging on about what a great wife/mother/person I was. And I was taken in and did so much for her, thinking it just took time to get to know her.

Christmas 2006, she took offence at me asking her to bring the kids' presents with her when she came on the 27th, rather than delivering earlier, so that they weren't overwhelmed and could have fun opening them with her. She emailed me, saying "Christmas is cancelled. If anyone asks, tell them I'm fine, but apparently not dying as quickly as some people would like. I hope you'll be very happy without me"
Of course, she then turned up on the 27th, with presents, like nothing had happened 🤣🤣

During lockdown, she sulked because one of my teens didn't want to join her "family" WhatsApp chat group (basically her and her sister) - she emailed him (aged 16) such a nasty rant about how ungrateful he was. He was a bit bemused but when I showed it to exDH, he "had a word" and she emailed again saying "please excuse that email, I've not been myself recently, I think Covid affects old people differently". He now barely sees his grandmother because she's a weirdo (his words)!!

I can laugh now, but sulking adults who are supposed to care about you is damaging and toxic. Hurrah to us all who have got rid 🎉

zaxxon · 10/05/2024 12:00

I can laugh now, but sulking adults who are supposed to care about you is damaging and toxic. Hurrah to us all who have got rid 🎉

Amen to that. I laughed a lot at this thread ("he lost at rock paper scissors!"), but I'm also full of admiration for all those who have broken free of such awful manipulative partners/family.

StarsHideYourFir3s · 10/05/2024 12:10

what I'm getting from this thread is it's great to be single?! These men, honestly.

MotherofChaosandDestruction · 10/05/2024 12:26

StarsHideYourFir3s · 10/05/2024 12:10

what I'm getting from this thread is it's great to be single?! These men, honestly.

Amen to that!

JeepSleeHack · 10/05/2024 12:45

Outwiththenorm · 10/05/2024 10:46

DH is not a sulker thank god but these stories are bringing back suppressed memories of spending most of my teens trying to placate my sulking best friend. Half the time I had no idea what she was sulking about, sometimes it was because I’d spoken to another friend or looked at her the wrong way. The hours I wasted trying to get her back in a good mood until finally when I was 15 another friend said ‘why do you put up with that?’ It was a lightbulb moment.

My DD’s best friend at primary was an epic sulker. The friends dad was the same - I used to really feel for mum.

dragonscannotswim · 10/05/2024 12:52

espressomartini22 · 09/05/2024 22:07

After years and years of begging to go on a holiday, I gave up begging.
I worked my butt off to save and take myself and kids away for 2 weeks. Had the most amazing chilled two weeks of my life! When we got back he didn't speak to me for a whole week.

I hope he's now an ex?

BigDahliaFan · 10/05/2024 13:11

AuntieJoyce · Yesterday 13:07
I remember an epic sulk at Brimham rocks because it involved too much time walking round the rocks and he wanted to get to Betty’s.

In fact, I can think of several days out which were not to his liking because they didn’t involve going straight to the tea room

All our worst rows/sulks have been when hungry. We've now learnt to go to the tea room first.....

The keyboard playing husband is gobsmacking.

A friend bought their boyfriend to stay for the weekend, he didn't enjoy himself and sulked about us trying to involve him or ignoring him (we were all in our 40s). We took him out on a boat trip and saw dolphins - pretty amazing! He sulked at that. Then we over heard him on the phone to a friend saying how amazing it had been....odd.

GingerIsBest · 10/05/2024 13:21

A friend bought their boyfriend to stay for the weekend, he didn't enjoy himself and sulked about us trying to involve him or ignoring him (we were all in our 40s). We took him out on a boat trip and saw dolphins - pretty amazing! He sulked at that. Then we over heard him on the phone to a friend saying how amazing it had been....odd.

Oh, this reminds me of the time MIL couldn't work out why BIL had spent most of two days locked in a bedroom sulking (SIL had gone to get her hair cut, leaving him to look after their DC but he was annoyed that MIL didn't do it instead) while on holiday in her place-people-go-for-a-once-in-a-lifetime-holiday-but-she-is-lucky-to-live-there-all-the-time home, only to overhear him on a call to family in the UK about how amazing it was.

ManagedMove · 10/05/2024 13:25

Frith2013 · 09/05/2024 12:32

Our wedding

Ultrasound of our second child (he refused to look at the screen)

Every Christmas

Omg - Ultraound! My jaw literally dropped, the ridiculousness! Feel for you being stuck with him for any moment of time!

Aquarelles · 10/05/2024 13:25

Sulked because I asked him to make his own bed, for estate agent photos. (We had separated and were selling the house). He pouted and said "Can you not do it, you're so much better at it than me?" Hmm Pulling some sheets straight, are you joking???