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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

what do you do when your mother hates your DH????

7 replies

Ouisie · 31/12/2004 01:48

Have just discovered that my parents really dislike my DH. They feel that he makes them unwelcome and takes them for granted when he needs them to do something for us. They feel devastated that we got married! Came to a head at Christmas and I feel awful. I actually think my DH has treated them badly but he denies it and can't see what they are unhappy about. Also difficult because my and DH's families are very different and I get the impression that his family think we are all stuck up. Anyone else in this situation?????

OP posts:
lulupop · 31/12/2004 10:00

yes. exactly the same.

sorry to say that in my case, there is no solution - my parents think dh is a wanker, because he's the world's expert on everything. That being the case, he doesn't care what other people think, as he knows he's in the right!

I am starting to agree with my parents in any case.

Pineapple · 31/12/2004 10:03

I wouldn't say my mother hated my dh but there is certainly no love lost there on either side. Although I probably do get on better with my inlaws than I do with my own parents (but thats a whole new thread)

Carla · 31/12/2004 10:08

Keep them apart as much as is humanly possible

Bradsmum · 31/12/2004 11:36

Ouisie - I have the same problem - my ds hates my dm with a passion and for no particular reason other than she is somewhat scatty and occasionally irritating. He makes a big thing of it whenever she comes to the house (which she does to look after our ds once a week). Has come to the stage where we were on our own for Xmas as she didn't want to come and neither did anyone else as he can be such an a...hole about keeping the house immaculate and is convinced everything will be "destroyed" by visitors ..

jampots · 31/12/2004 11:45

My mum didnt like my dh (we married after she died) but was perfectly civil to him and was occasionally amused by him but thought he was an a**ehole too. She also felt the same about his parents esp his dad. Dh on the other hand thought my mum was great but that was probably to do with the fact that she would babysit and have dd every afternoon to save on nursery fees. Whenever my mum invited us to her house for dinner etc dh would cause an argument and end up not going - even 10 days after having ds by c/section, he just got out of hte car and stormed off leaving me to drive hte rest of the way to my mums - so can see why she disliked him. My dad did quite like him but he died in 1991 so didn't obviously get to know him quite as well.

Donbean · 31/12/2004 11:46

Not my DH but my mother hates my sisters fiance. Of course she rips him to shreds to us. Admittedly he is a very difficult person to get along with although i have never had a problem with him personally. Although i can see her point about him. Whenever i invite her over i try to do it when i know it will just be my sis and nephew, say when he is at work or footy.
I try to just listen and not get drawn in or involved when my mum starts as im always worried that it will get back to him and make a bad situation worse.
The way i see it, you cant please all the people all the time can you?

Original poster
Ouisie · 01/01/2005 03:27

Oh well it is comforting to know that this happens to other people to! I guess we might try the "keep them all apart" manoeuvre and see how it goes. It's just sad because I quit like spending time with my family...

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