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Original poster

Child teacher not responding to me

59 replies

regretnot · 27/04/2024 16:31

Child started reception in private school.. since she started I’ve been in touch initially quite a bit she also had a fair amount of time off due to being poorly etc.,

I don’t get a good vibe from the teacher toward me specifically.. she interacts verbally with other parents at pick up on occasions..

she doesn’t interact with me and recently hasn’t replied to my email asking for a bit more info regard child’s social/emotional wellbeing - as he doesn’t seem too happy.. the email was general, would be nice to find out further information surround the wellbeing of child this term.. could we touch base in a few weeks to get your thoughts so u can understand better and support more..

should I call a meeting?

I don’t want to badger but at the same time feel like I need to know more what’s going on..

one of the other mums made a joke that the teacher rarely gets back to her, but they are actually on what I would call friendly/chatty terms and I felt this maybe a dig at me!

OP posts:
Blahdymcblahdyface · 27/04/2024 16:35

The teacher’s health is none of your business
Why were you messaging so much at the beginning?

LaurieFairyCake · 27/04/2024 16:40

Didn't you have a parents evening before Easter? 2 weeks ago ?

Icanseethebeach · 27/04/2024 16:40

Your email sounds very vague. If you haven’t decided what you want then how is she supposed to know. You need to decide what you want and then email eg

Dear Mrs Smith,

I hope you have had a nice weekend.

I’m worried about Jane’s behaviour at home. She is upset at bed time/setting fire to the house/whatever your concerns are.

Please can you tell me what she is like a school or if you have any concerns either via email or perhaps we could arrange a time for 10 min chat about it.

Kind Regards,
regretnot

funasamum · 27/04/2024 16:47

Wow.

By your post - I'd say you were pretty needy and very judgy. What on earth has her being ill got to do with anything?

Have you not ever had a meeting about your child - why do you need more and more contact with her? I'd imagine school would let you know if they had any concerns.

xyz111 · 27/04/2024 16:49

Maybe she finds you very overwhelming

WarshipRocinante · 27/04/2024 16:50

This isn’t normal. Most parents don’t contact like that in such general terms. If you have an actual issue then ask about that, otherwise just back off a bit and see if your child flourishes with some independence.

Familiaritybreedscontemptso · 27/04/2024 16:54

Just go up to her at pick up and ask for a meeting to discuss x (be specific). Get a date in the diary, or just ask if you can speak for 5 minutes at the end of the day. No need for all this angst.

Possibly you’ve been very full on & teacher has been trying to wean you off. Did you post about this before as I remember a few months ago a similar post talking about the teacher being friendly to other parents but not the op (in their perception)?

Dacadactyl · 27/04/2024 16:55

Do you know how many times I sent an email to my childrens teachers throughout their primary school years?

Less than 5 times in total, over the 13 years I had kids at that school.

Stop emailing them.

Spirallingdownwards · 27/04/2024 16:58

School is not nursery where you get a daily update.

The contact you if there is a specific issue.

General discussions about everything else is carried out at parents evenings or expressed in writing in school reports (especially at independent schools).

Anewuser · 27/04/2024 16:59

I’m guessing this is your first child?

Generally, you shouldn’t need to have too much contact with teachers unless there are problems. That’s what parents evenings are for.

At pick up times, interactions would be due to a child’s behaviour so unless your child had SEN or had been involved in an incident then I wouldn’t think the teacher would need to speak to you.

PurpleJustice · 27/04/2024 17:01

You don't need to have a relationship with the teacher, they are there to teach your child, that's it. Emailing to ask non-specific, vague questions about your child's 'emotional well-being' won't help you bond with the teacher, just irritate them.

If there was an issue with your child's social development, then the teacher would have shared their concerns already.

Have you not recently had a parents evening?

Greywitch2 · 27/04/2024 17:09

Do you realise how heavy a teacher's workload is without parents sending frequent emails and wanting constant feedback on general stuff?

Unless there is an urgent query, or an emergency you shouldn't emailing the teacher at all, to be honest. They don't have time to respond to you. If there is an issue with your child or they have concerns about them they will inform you.

Otherwise, leave them alone.

pearlevu · 27/04/2024 17:13

Has your child been poorly or the teacher?

pearlevu · 27/04/2024 17:14

PurpleJustice · 27/04/2024 17:01

You don't need to have a relationship with the teacher, they are there to teach your child, that's it. Emailing to ask non-specific, vague questions about your child's 'emotional well-being' won't help you bond with the teacher, just irritate them.

If there was an issue with your child's social development, then the teacher would have shared their concerns already.

Have you not recently had a parents evening?

Yes I do find it odd this post is in relationships and centered around the teacher

SabbatWheel · 27/04/2024 17:20

Thank god we are not allowed to contact parents directly at our school. Everything is gate-guarded by the Head of Year. Couldn’t be arsed with dozens of emails flying round about (what would be mostly) insignificant issues.

Shinyandnew1 · 27/04/2024 17:22

Why do you need a relationship with your child’s teacher?!

Have you had a parents evening this year?

pearlevu · 27/04/2024 17:24

I felt this maybe a dig at me! you won't even register with them

Boomer55 · 27/04/2024 17:28

Leave the poor teacher alone, unless you have specific concerns.

ontheflighttosingapore · 27/04/2024 17:29

The teacher will tell you if there's a problem. She's busy. Leaver her alone

Domino20 · 27/04/2024 17:32

Haven't you posted about this before?

AnnaCBi · 27/04/2024 17:41

funasamum · 27/04/2024 16:47

Wow.

By your post - I'd say you were pretty needy and very judgy. What on earth has her being ill got to do with anything?

Have you not ever had a meeting about your child - why do you need more and more contact with her? I'd imagine school would let you know if they had any concerns.

It’s not judgy to be concerned that a teacher is off a lot and not responding to emails. In a private school there is an expectation that parents will be in contact with teachers.

AnnaCBi · 27/04/2024 17:41

Email the head of EYFS/ lower school and ask to meet. Copy in the teacher.

Original poster
regretnot · 27/04/2024 23:25

2nd child

not posted before

parents evening overran and therefore rushed 10mins..

OP posts:
Soonenough · 27/04/2024 23:31

This is a private fee paying school so I don't think you are being unreasonable. A response setting up a short meeting after school would be easy to do and recommended by my DCs school.

Smartiepants79 · 27/04/2024 23:50

Familiaritybreedscontemptso · 27/04/2024 16:54

Just go up to her at pick up and ask for a meeting to discuss x (be specific). Get a date in the diary, or just ask if you can speak for 5 minutes at the end of the day. No need for all this angst.

Possibly you’ve been very full on & teacher has been trying to wean you off. Did you post about this before as I remember a few months ago a similar post talking about the teacher being friendly to other parents but not the op (in their perception)?

I remember the same post. This OP is extremely similar.🤔
Regular contact with parents once at school is unusual. As is chummy chats after school in the playground.
If you have a specific issue that you have concerns around then request a meeting.
The teacher is not your mate.
Her relationship with any other parent is nothing to do with you.