stood up

[PearlShaker]

Hello,

I have never posted before on here so here goes : I have been chatting to someone online for 2 months via whatsapp. and one video call/voice messages etc. We were supposed to meet up a while a go and he said he had forgot. He said it was mostly because he had got a new phone and lost numbers, he said he assumed he had lost his chance. Anyway fast forward to last week and we had made arrangements to meet at my house ( to pick me up). He was texting during the day and called me after work saying he would be a bit late as he he had forgot his change of clothes and was going home, told me not to worry he wasnt cancelling. He never turned up after that call. I tried to call him, thinking something had happened and he didnt answer. He has been online on whatsapp and I have heard nothing at allll!!. Would you ask what happened and why I was stood up?. I have not messaged him since, but I am not sure what to do?. Any adice would be great

Just leave it. He isn’t interested. If you text then either a) he won’t respond or b) he’ll tell you some waffly lie about why he didn’t show up. What’s the point?

So he "forgot" your first date and then stood you up when you gave him a second chance?!?! Why would you even waste any more time or energy on him?!

A tenner says that if you do nothing, he'll eventually pop up again with a tale of woe- family crisis, dead mother etc

Hell would freeze over before I would contact this twat. I also would not respond to anything he sent me. That's such bad manners, and also entirely bonkers. Sketchy as shit.

I havent messaged him since, but he seemed to be really looking forward to it too. I havent blocked cos whats the point, i think it was because he was calling and messaging so I did think something had happened, but yeah clearly not interested hey!!. Why do they do this, should I block, I dont no, tbh im fuming and want to tell him hes a twat lol, but I wont

I know its petty, but I kinda want him to contact me so I can ignore him lol. Silly I know

What a weirdo but he stood you up twice. Let it go.

who is the weirdo ? I hope you mean him

Imagine how nasty you have to be, to actually do this. Narrow escape me thinks.

Yes put him out of your mind.

He is a total weirdo, but at least he has shown you what he is early on. Believe him, as the saying goes

Thanks everyone. I think its the fact he called on his way home as if he was still coming, so what could have happened as soon as he got home. But yeah I need to forget it I guess. His mum does stay with him occasionally ( so he says) as she has cancer so I orginally thought it was his mum, but to not even tell me

There is ZERO excuse for standing someone up. He has a phone in his pocket. He's done it to see how much you will tolerate. He will ask for another date very soon.

Not worth the headspace, the first time, losing his phone sounds like a lie tbh. A date has one chance to impress you imo, if they flake then not worth it at all.

no he got a new phone and was migrating everything over, but he still shouldnt have forgot, he was even messaging me when he went on holiday with his friends, dont get it

Absolutely don't get in touch with him to give him a piece of your mind. Just don't. He will get more satisfaction knowing he's got under your skin than you'll get getting it off your chest.

If he does get in touch at a later date and try to arrange a THIRD date to stand you up on, take your time (a few days) then reply "nah, you're not getting a third chance to stand me up, bye" then ignore any further messages from him.

My first advice would be to never give a stranger your address. The next advice is to chat no longer than a week before arranging a meet so you don't waste time and get invested, then meet 2 weeks after first chatting- again, less time wasted.
You've taken up 2 months of your time for someone who could be a catfish, or just clearly had no intention of meeting ever.

If this is what he's like when he's trying to impress you, imagine what intolerable acts of cruelty he has lined up down the pipe. Run hard.

He didn’t forget your first date and he didn’t forget his clothes on the second date. He just stood you up. Don’t even wonder about it. He probably just chickened out.

He stood you up. Don't give him head space

I’m quite surprised you would let him know where you live having not met him before…

Catfish

of course his mother has cancer

You've got to be quite a shit to do that to someone once never mind twice.
I would put money on him being married and domestics put paid to his plans at the last minute, because people with nothing to hide can keep romantic liaison arrangements very easily.
I've slippy slippy fish there and you've had a lucky escape.
Don't waste two months chatting next time, meet up quickly so you don't build it up, in your minds eye, into anything it isn't.

Maybe he had forgot his clothes and when he got home to get them his wife reminded him it was parents evening or something

You know what your right I would love for him to text so you could tell him to bugger off. He’s hurt your pride and tbh it’s not nice . Your a winner in this you found out really early what ur dealing with …. Id block him and move on asap