Have I been ghosted

[Ash2345f]

I went on a 2nd date on Sunday with a guy I have mutual friends with, it went really well he stayed over as we both had drinks. He left the following morning we both said good bye kissed etc it was great. He then text me when he got home he said he had a great time and I was ‘class’ I text him later that day and got no response I put this down to him being a little hungover. So I text him today around 11am just saying hope you’re over your hangover I have some unexpected free time tonight if you want to meet up. I have heard nothing i am so confused given the feedback post date….am I now being ghosted?!

@Ash2345f how much contact were you having with him before Sunday?

Pretty frequent he was ringing me after the gym sometimes before work and messaging a few times during the day

You messaged him today about meeting tonight? Maybe he’s at work and hasn’t read it. Sometimes I look at messages and then think I’ve responded when I haven’t. I’d give him a couple more days to contact you before I would call it ghosting.

Sounds awful but it really does seem like you've been ghosted. He's done what he's wanted to do and now not interested. It's horrible but not at all a reflection on you x

As he stayed over I presume you had sex?

It does sound like that’s what he wanted and he’s lost interest tbh.

Yep ghosted. They can be shites.

No we didn’t have sex - i primarily didn’t have sex with him for that reason. It’s all very odd I don’t know why he would say all those things when he got home if he didn’t mean them.

I don’t think you can call it ghosting after less than 6 hours!
Just relax and give the man a chance!

Too early to tell!! Keep yourself busy so you aren't waiting for his calls!

If he always has his phone in his hand and before Sunday he'd have replied quicker I'd say there's a good chance you have indeed been ghosted. You just feel it sometimes...I think you're getting the vibes. Forget the coward

It’s been mere hours, I don’t think you can write it off as ghosting but you’re free to make whatever decisions you want!

@Ash2345f can you see if he has opened and read the message?

It's been more than a few hours if the op text yday before the 11am today text

I agree with pp , sometimes you just know in your gut, especially when the chat has previously been frequent

Hope we're wrong

Been there . It sucks. Keep busy .

Been there too , and it really does suck.
Like @solice84 has just said it's been more than few hours if she messaged him yesterday as well.
It's the change in frequency of contact that I dont like, as OP said he would normally contact a few times a day & call her also.
What do you feel in your gut @Ash2345f

He didn’t respond to your previous text. I sure as hell wouldn’t have told him I have free time and invited him round. He can’t even be bothered to text you.
Keep your dignity.

I would suspect ghosted (and have experienced it). Be glad you didn't have sex as you would feel even worse.

I would think ghosted. But I'm always sceptical in these circumstances

It’s just so strange as he seemed really into me and the messages yesterday morning once he got home said the same. I just don’t understand what’s changed but something has - I’ll not be messaging any further if he gets in touch great but I’d probably want to explore a couple of dates down the line why this happened. Genuinely believe I’ve been ghosted but it’s crazy as we will have to see each other at mutual friends parties and so on! Don’t know why he wouldn’t just say if he wasn’t feeling it

Oh I really feel for you @Ash2345f !
That's exactly why ghosting is so hard to process because it's quite often at a point when we think all is going so well.
It's so harsh and makes him look such a coward , whatever is going on if he comes back it better be a good excuse. A male friend recently said to me no one is ever to busy to send atleast a quick text to let you know all is ok etc, family emergency , crisis that sort of thing can of course happen but men that want to be in your life can still send a quick reply.
Unfortunately it does sound like ghosting, sending you a big hug xx
When it last happened to me it was after such an amazing weekend we had spent together, I was gutted so I do I understand how you must be feeling it kind of hits you doenst it?
Get back out there arrange some dates, talk to some other men & dont give him a second thought.
The mutual friend thing is only awkward for him ( the coward) you can hold your head up high proudly .
What an idiot he has made himself look!

If you don't hear from him again that's how you'll find out OP. You've contacted him, I'd leave it now and wait and see.

Yes it’s absolutely awful, had a run of badly behaved men with zero morals. I don’t know how they can do it, should just be open and honest if they don’t want to pursue things I would have much more respect for him.

Nothing has changed! He didn’t mean the nice words he said in the first place. I’ve met countless men who say bullsh*t the moment they open their mouths. They just can’t help themselves. The last guy I dated told me soon after he met me that I had bewitched him, took his breath away, etc etc. None of it was true. I’ll never know why he felt the need to lovebomb me as I was very willing to sleep with him.

But what a coward he is to ghost you. He clearly isn’t all that bright if he couldn’t even come up with an excuse, perhaps the typical lie ‘’I realised I’m not ready for a relationship at the moment’’.

You should thank all your angels that you only wasted two dates on him. Imagine if he liked you more! He would have acted better initially but his true colours would have shown eventually. Ghosting is such shitty, imature behaviour:

He may come back with some pathetic excuse but you already know the truth. You know what it means when a man is glued to his phone and then suddenly doesn’t find time to text

i’m sorry you’re upset about it. I really know how you feel. Wish I could give you a hug.

What a loser. His loss!

So no message definitely ghosted. I really feel like I want to message him saying look I’m not sure what’s happened it’s fine if your not feeling it would just rather know incase we ever bump into each other at mutual friends home. Or should I just leave it now? I hate not having the why!!

All I can say is whenever I've called out a man's shitty behaviour I've regretted it down the line and wished I'd just stayed quiet
Put all your efforts into keeping busy so you don't think about it
It's so common so don't take it personally