Would you go back to his on second date?

[Holibobby]

Met a guy Saturday that I’ve been chatting to from OLD. drank a little too much wine and had to cut the date short as I didn’t feel too great! Not good first impressions but he seems keen still! We’ve arranged cinema date this week and he’s said I’m welcome to stay over as my work the next day is close to his house.

But I’m unsure, seems like a really great guy but is it too soon?!! Surprised he’s asked!

No. Just no. Not from any prudishness but just safety.

Personally, I think it’s too soon.

personally, I would be wary, but then, I'm risk averse. Too soon @Holibobby 😊

He's probably hoping for some, but if you're worried, make your boundaries clear. You're an adult, you're free to sleep with him after 5 minutes if you're comfortable... but don't feel pressured.

Bit forward!

Too soon for me, but whatever you're comfortable with. He will of course be expecting sex, if you don't want that are you assertive enough to turn him down? I wouldn't feel like I knew him enough from a safety perspective either. He might be lovely but what's the rush?

It’s not something I would do and he clearly will be expecting sex but that’s your call? I’m surprised he asked outright though like that

Go on the date yes but unless you’re sure about sex and possibly ok with it just being a hook up then don’t stay over yet.

Not if I wanted something serious. Have for fwbs

'Surprised he’s asked!'

Really?! He probs thinks you'll have too much to drink again and he'll be in with a chance.

I wouldn’t, I’m a slow burner & I have to build foundations to fancy them enough. I know this sounds utterly boring but it’s served me well.

Also, what if he’s a murderer?! Chances are he isn’t but I wouldn’t want to. I mean, he could still be a murderer after 10 dates though. Sorry, not very helpful.

It's too soon, especially as too much alcohol on the first date may of clouded your judgement of him, unfortunately men will try to rush through a couple of dates to get you in bed, always puts me off when they suggest going to theirs before a 3rd date, I'd see how he reacts if you turn down the offer of staying over, if he backs off then that was his only goal.

In those circumstances, no.

i dodged the question on text but I’m going to tell him no, would make me feel uncomfortable going round so soon! Don’t want him to think I’m just a hook up either! He’s been open and said hes after a long term relationship but guess a guy can say anything!

I think it would be potentially unsafe, especially if your perceptions of him on the first date were likely to have been clouded by alcohol. And allowing for the possibility that this virtual stranger thinks you might be drunk and incapable again, and that’s why he’s invited you to stay at his... It’s not a situation I’d put myself in with someone I don’t know.

For the purposes of safety I'd say no, plus tbh I'd wanna make him wait way longer than a 2nd date!

He’s been open and said hes after a long term relationship and invited you to stay at his.

i don’t know how old you are but you sound a bit silly
-just because he says he is after a long-term relationship doesn’t mean he is
-drunk on first date
-going back to his on second date

Please be safe.

It would put me off that he’d asked tbh

Your DH (and you it seems) are being unreasonable. It's not a child's fault the parents aren't together or that he wants to join the football club his friends go to. Why should he suffer because of adults. A lot of kids clubs are every weekend and going every other week is never ok.

Sorry wrong thread! Can't delete as on the app 🙈

I'd do it but I'm gay. Women killing women is so much more rare.
I'd not do it in this case. Just tell him you're not fully comfortable with that yet. A decent guy will understand.

On this one though, no I wouldn't, feels far too planned! Also, it's potentially unsafe.

I wouldn’t even consider it.

Well in my day it would be yes if you want to ‘stay over’ and aren’t bothered either way about it turning into long term. If you want a long term relationship I’d make him wait and make sure his intentions are actually good.

Many MN’s post about being ghosted after sex by dating site men. Other MN’s respond back…yep what did you expect!! If you are interested in LTR wait a bit to get to know him more. You really didn’t even have one date yet.