Would you be hurt by this or am I overreacting?

[Esther12]

I have been with my boyfriend almost 1 year, we are early 30s.
from I met he has always referenced how good a kisser he is, everyone has commented on it etc. to be fair I really do enjoy kissing him.
last night we were talking about our first date and first kiss and I asked if he thought I was a good kisser after our first kiss and he said no and laughed. He obviously seen my face and then followed it up with saying that he loves kissing me now but he didn’t know me back then and he did come away from the kiss and thought “I’m definitely a better kisser than her”. It’s really hurt my feelings (and ego too probably) and I just feel it was an unnecessary comment to make but maybe I shouldn’t have asked?. would you be hurt by this?

Yeah it is definitely something he’s weirdly attached to.

How does he know he’s a good kisser? What a weird thing to be attached to in your 30s.

How bizarre. Aside from the immaturity, I hope he doesn’t try to put you down in other ways.

He sounds odd as fuck but you asked the question...

Whenever I read on here about someone stuck with a crappy man who seemed fine at the start. I always imagine they missed some warning sign like this.

It wasn’t a kind comment. Partners should be kind to each other, it’s very simple.

I've done a lot of snogging in my time. No one is magically good at kissing everyone perfectly. It's such an individual thing.

A genuinely good kisser wouldn't barrel in there with their predesignated technique and be genuinely convinced it's going to suit everyone. I doubt he's as good as he thinks he is.

And yes, it's rude to tell someone they're crap. I've kissed some people and straight away, it's not been for me. I just chalk it up to incompatibility rather than one person being crap. Obviously unless they've done something blatantly weird, but that's not common.

Exactly this.

Don't you get fed up with him going on about what a good kisser he is, op? He's absolutely ridiculous!

You both sound like children

Just tell him - it’s weird, usually good kissers are great in bed but that doesn’t translate with you 😂

He is proud of being the top lad kisser and you wanted to contest his title.

Lol definitely didn’t wanna steal his title. Just asked and his response and laughter caught me off guard. I think I would have been kinder in my response

It was unkind of him, and not necessary.

If he says anything about being a good kisser again, say we girls have a secret code you know. We say “good kisser, small pisser”. I mean, I just made that up obvs but he isn’t to know.

Yuk! I dated a guy from online app who took kissing very seriously.

on our second date, he was giving me a tutorial on what he liked…( which was basically mouths wide open with his tongue and spit everywhere…in public!! 🤢)

there wasn’t a third.

it’s such a minor thing, but shows immaturity in the way he dealt with it. As pps have said, he was very unkind

When me and my boyfriend first had sex (we've been together 3 years now) it wasn't great 😂 however we have great sex now because we know each other and what we like. We both laugh now about how terrible the sex was. Personally I don't think it's a big deal, just laugh it off and know that now he enjoys kissing you because you both know how each other kisses. Honestly it's not the end of the world

I think the people calling you children/laughing at you sound much more immature than you do op! I’d be hurt by this personally, I wonder if it’s some sort of negging thing?

I'd probably feel a little hurt but then you did ask and he was honest with you so you can't really be too annoyed I suppose.

But I'd find his comments about him being such a good kisser a bit of a turn off tbh, it's a weird thing to brag about 😄

Bizarre. Ok, you asked and were told but that's not really how it works, you didn't ask out of nowhere. he's been banging on about this ages so you were provoked to ask back and he jumped on the chance to use his sense of self belief in this area (real or otherwise) to diminish you. The laughing suggest he was waiting for an opportunity to do so. You can say that things improved over time in a nice way. all odd. Is he generally insecure?

Absolutely right tone devastated by this comment. This is literally the most important aspect of your relationship. Get the kiss right and the next 40 years together will be a breeze.

Are you sure you are both 30?

So it’s your boyfriend who says ‘everyone’ comments on how good a kisser he is? And talking about the first time you kissed, he stood back and proclaimed proudly, like a toddler who’s just managed his first poo in a potty, ‘Best kiss of your life, right?’

And you’re still considering staying in the relationship? Does he extend this unattractive habit to other aspects of his sexual technique?

Anyone banging on about how good a kisser they are would have me running for the hills. Tedious, boring, egomaniac would be my thoughts. Also, saying you were not a good kisser is putting you down. Are you supposed to be grateful that such a 'good kisser' took you on?

I certainly wouldn't value his opinion (on kissing or anything else) to get upset about it. Nor would I want to be in a relationship with him!

This.

I just wouldn’t be in that situation as I don’t have such juvenile conversations with my husband.

Haha sorry op but he sounds like abit of a tool, who cares how good a kisser he is ? Makes me wonder how highly he rates himself in the sack 😆

Ugh what a dick!

a) it’s pathetic to tell someone you’ve kissed that everyone else thinks you’re great at it
b) “best kiss of your life right?” 🤮
c) cruel to say you’re not a good kisser when he clearly places such high importance on it
d) it takes two for a good kiss, it’s not something you can unilaterally decide you’re good at without any input from the other person
e) he needs to grow up