Ejaculation

[Jojo77777]

Hey I've been seeing my new boyfriend for about 3 months, I'm starting to fall for him. The only one issue is he does not ejaculate when we have sex, I have asked him about this and he says, he doesn't always and h3 think he could be mentally blocking it out,

Interesting take, a man who can't orgasm with his new partner is a red flag? Can you say a bit more about what a red flag means to you and why this might be one?

Sex is weird and humans are complicated and this doesn't mean a thing other than right now he's not reaching orgasm when you have sex and that doesn't need to be a problem if it's not a problem. As people get older sex changes, this is a fact and none of us are immune to it. If you're binning perfectly decent relationships because of things like this it's a lonely old life you'll be looking at.

Well yes, that's probably true... if they were with someone with your attitude and prejudices!

His age.. probably ED..
Could be prostate too.. he needs to see his GP.
For people saying " she's picked a winner" etc.. don't be cruel.
It's definitely medical.

A man dates a woman who struggles to orgasm, 100% dead bedroom in the future ?

Would dump her and run be the given advice?

Op, probably nerves. My dh was the same the first few months of being together. No issues now and lasts longer. We’re on our 40s

Poor bloke. Not only can he not have an orgasm he also has loads of women who don’t know him accusing him of being addicted to porn and trying to get him dumped.

OP does he ever get close to an orgasm during sex or is there just nothing?

I think there's a view that if sex isn't totally amazing and without any complications from the get go - along with everything else in the relationship being blissful and perfect - then the relationship should be binned.

The problem with that is that these relationships develop and mature without any need for real communication, discussion or need to show patience or kindness.... But there comes a point in every relationship where these things are needed - the honeymoon never lasts forever - and if you haven't established whether you can navigate these kind of things successfully in the early stages of a relationship, then it can all go wrong, and often very painfully because bonds have been established and love has grown.

There's something to be said for things not being too perfect in the early days... you learn far more about real long term compatibility through managing these things than you do living in a dreamy honeymoon perfection, and yes, often it doesn't work and the issues are too big, but at least you're not in too deep by that point....

And anyone who insists on such "Disney" perfection risks a lot of disappointment, either at the start of relationship, when good men are binned, or a few months/years in when that "perfect" relationship unravelled as you actually face some real life difficulties that you can't resolve between you.

That’s so positive and a great attitude to have, it’s not a problem unless people make it a problem. He knew what was causing it too. Is it still the same now?

It's not the same, because he dumped me, but gor reasons unconnected to sex, so I assume he's much the same.

Two of my exes learnt how NOT to ejaculate - it’s makes sex fab and based far more around the journey and woman than men who focus on cumming

Oh yes, I've had a couple of guys who practise edging.

The boyfriend I had that this issue admitted that he watched a huge amount of porn. He’d basically gotten used to finishing in his own way.

I think that can happen with any guy who doesn't have sex for a while, irrespective of whether they use porn, as practically all men masturbate. It's not really any different from getting used to cumming using a vibrator during sex famines... PIV is a different experience!

However, porn will make matters worse, possibly much worse... Not only is there the different physical sensation, but constantly filling your head with porn must make the whole visual sensation different too, not to mention focussing on stuff like group sex or anal, which distances the mind even further from normal sexual experience.

Could I pm you about this please

Why?

Just wanted to ask about it, get a woman’s point of view and the not always ejaculating

Don't think I can add to what's been said in this thread. I don't have a problem with no ejaculation. Others might.

Long time not in a relationship leads to
masturbation and massive porn habit leads to
early relationship problems with ejaculation leads to
viagra leads to
stiff for hours leads to
no ejaculation leads to
sexless marriage
i would bet.

Rather Viagra than ED or PE.

There's also the posters who just make stuff up and completely exaggerate about what other posters say 😉

I'd encourage anyone, male or female to consider a relationship very carefully with someone who had vaginismus or ED etc from the start especially if sex was important to them. They have to consider the possibility that things may not improve and may even get worse and they may never have a 'normal' sex life.

@PaulPasta

Just wanted to ask about it, get a woman’s point of view and the not always ejaculating

Why can't you ask about it in the thread? It's anonymous after all. And you'll get the benefit of more than one response. Given that I can't see any need for a PM, it feels quite creepy for a random man to try and initiate a private conversation with a woman he doesn't know about a sensitive sexual topic.

Interesting, but I'm struggling with the logic of "stiff for hours" leads to "sexless marriage". If a guy is stiff for hours I'm pretty sure he'll genuinely want to use it, irrespective of how easily he ejaculates! 😂

"genuinely"... i meant "generally"

Imagine a man saying that! He'd be called selfish for not caring.