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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

My life blew up

64 replies

Ladyinturmoil · 08/01/2024 22:10

november 22 , boy (married) chances his luck with me (married) end up kissing long story short. We were together a couple of times when very young, also he is a nearby neighbour. Chased me when younger at 18. But we were young etc.
fast forward that night, i asked what was it with us, he said we have a connection etc. last time about 19/20 we kissed and we both had partners too.
absolutely no contact since then. Didnt exchange numbers etc. moved on for the year. Just last week i got his number and rang him after greeting him at a funeral. He had a few words with my dad. They both love each other. I dont know what came over me. I cant explain it. I honestly cant. He text me two mins later to say he was in the pub with my brother and said “well, how are you? here in with … and co..
i didnt give him my number?
i reolied and said i was just ok and then said i would leave them to it…
2 hours later he text and asked if i was in homeplace ? And i said no i was in X with friends for night. (I lied because i didnt know what to say)
he said enjoy, have a good night. I replied thanks with a teary face. He replied immediately with whats up? I didn’t reply then 10 mins later asking can he ring me? I didnt reply.
met him following night, he was on date for dinner with the wife.
the following day i asked text him to give me a buzz last week if it suited. He replied a few mins later saying “OK, will do….
that will be two weeks next fri so had a feeling he wouldnt call me . I feel like a complete fool to be honest. I actually dont know why i rang him in first place , dont know what came over me.
he hasnt blocked me and we are still friends on FB.
there has always been something there, i cant explain it nor can i move on from it. Obviously i wont be contacting him again but my head is a mess. Help me see sense. Why did he have my number?

OP posts:
twnety · 08/01/2024 22:11

Clearly he had your number because you phoned him?

LunaLovegoodsLeftEyebrow · 08/01/2024 22:12

You’re being ridiculous. Grow up. And block him.

twnety · 08/01/2024 22:13

LunaLovegoodsLeftEyebrow · 08/01/2024 22:12

You’re being ridiculous. Grow up. And block him.

I have no clue what happened or didn't happen?

Ladyinturmoil · 08/01/2024 22:13

But how would he have known it was me calling him. A year after no contact. I didnt give him my number

OP posts:
3luckystars · 08/01/2024 22:13

Drink involved and also a funeral.

Honestly just stop, there is ‘nothing there’ at all. You are both married and promised to be faithful to someone else. Just stop.

LunaLovegoodsLeftEyebrow · 08/01/2024 22:14

I read it as she had a kiss with someone 20 years ago and she is trying to rekindle it and frame it as a grand romance with her true love.

She’s married and so is he.

Greycottage · 08/01/2024 22:15

Your post is quite garbled. I don’t know why you’re texting him teary faces then leaving him on read. It all seems very immature.

If he was at the pub with your brother, he obviously got your number off your brother - “I’ll text X to see if she wants to join us, give me her number.”

Whose funeral? Sounds like you could be grieving.

Don’t blow up your marriage. He is married too. The chances of him leaving his wife for you are close to zero.

Justmuddlingalong · 08/01/2024 22:15

You're making a tit of yourself.
And a mockery of your marriage.

adriftinadenofvipers · 08/01/2024 22:16

You aren't living in a Mills & Boon novel!

Cuppa2sugars · 08/01/2024 22:16

It’s fatal attraction. How’s your marriage ?

Boomboomshakeshaketheroom · 08/01/2024 22:16

WTF is this about? Put the wine down, OP!

2024GarlicCloves · 08/01/2024 22:18

i got his number and rang him
That's why he had your phone number

He had a few words with my dad.
Well, obviously he knew he was talking to you (on the number you rang him from)!

He text me two mins later to say he was in the pub with my brother
Even if he's too thick to get your number from his call log, he could've asked your brother for it.

Are you drunk, by any chance? This is bonkers. Forget about it, and carry on being married to your husband.

Atethehalloweenchocs · 08/01/2024 22:27

Sorry, I cant really follow what the point is.

ItsBeenRaining · 08/01/2024 22:33

I'd calm down.

SamW98 · 08/01/2024 22:35

X

SamW98 · 08/01/2024 22:36

Is it a full moon or something tonight? It’s like a who can make the most batshit thread competition

Deebee90 · 08/01/2024 22:38

Put down the wine and go to sleep you’ll forget about this by the morning.

Ladyinturmoil · 08/01/2024 22:41

Sorry guys i must sound looney.

i made a mistake ringing this guy and now i have to reclaim my dignity. Just wished he wouldnt have replied to me at all and blocked me bit instead replied to all my messages and quite promptly!! Think my marriage is down the tubes

OP posts:
demonheed · 08/01/2024 22:43

Just block and delete him and ignore if you ever bump into him.

Oh, and your dad doesn't love him. It's not a fairytale, stop making stuff up 😅

Ladyinturmoil · 08/01/2024 22:46

Ya sorry i shouldnt have said loved him - i meant he is very fond of him 😉😅

OP posts:
ohwhatadustyanswer · 08/01/2024 22:47

If you rang him, he could have saved the number and looked on WhatsApp and seen your profile pic. Or googled your number. That’s what I would do if I had a missed call from a number I didn’t recognise.

determinedtomakethiswork · 08/01/2024 22:49

My advice is to stop drinking, stop kissing other men when you are married and focus on your marriage. If you're not happily married then you need to figure out what to do. If you are happily married then think how hurt your husband would be if he knew you were kissing men from your past. But most of all, stop drinking.

momonpurpose · 08/01/2024 22:52

Texting teary faces? This will not end well.

betterangels · 08/01/2024 22:56

there has always been something there, i cant explain it nor can i move on from it. I mean, you can. You just don't want to, or you wouldn't be talking about 'a connection' with a married man on the internet.

Life isn't a rom-com. Focus on your marriage or get a divorce.

WhereIsBebèsChambre · 08/01/2024 22:57

He had a few words with my dad. They both love each other.
Him and your dad.are in love?

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