2 year relationship not met his daughter

[brokencrayons]

Hello I’ve been in a relationship with a man for 26 mi the now. I have three children who he has met and he has a daughter who I’ve yet to meet. He keeps telling me it’ll happen next week, then he creates an argument. I’ve been very respectful of his decision and haven’t pushed the issue until last week. He shouted at me down the phone “do t ever bring up my daughter again!!!@ he’s also got me blocked on social media and never posts me on there. I’m really feeling insecure about myself and the relationship and I’m thinking of ending it as I feel disrespected and like I’m not good enough to be shared in his world. Am I being silly? I need advice

Of course you’re not being silly. He’s hiding you, and he’s hiding his life from you. Have you met any of his family or friends? It sounds to me like he’s potentially not actually single, or possibly his dd doesn’t exist. I’d be running for the hills. You deserve much better.

I would end it. You know he’s hiding something? Trust your gut. He doesn’t want anyone to know you exist which is why he has blocked you on social media, chances are his ex (if she’s his ex) doesn’t know you exist which is why he won’t introduce you to his daughter. Red flags everywhere, walk away.

Are you absolutely sure he’s not married?

I’m 100% sure he’s not married. Have met his mum and we have a good friendship message everyday.

Red flags everywhere.

There should rightly be caution about introducing a child to a mum/dads new partner but not introducing them at all after 2 years would get my spidy senses tingling. She either isn't real or he's married (or with the mother still) and hiding his relationship with you.

Yes but her loyalty isn't to you, it's to him.

He could still be with the mother of his child and you she wouldn't tell you.

It wouldn't be a first. A friend of mine was with someone for 3 years, saw her in-laws for lunches and days out and everything and it turns out he has a family and 2 kids.

He made up his child to appeal to you as a family man.

Agree with the above, a mother will do and say what ever her son wants her to say (not always but often). Something isn’t right. If he can’t tel you what the issue is then he’s hiding something.

Does his mum ever mention the daughter?

This, and are there photos of the daughter in her house? Most grandparents have photos and talk about their grandchildren.

Either there is no daughter which is very weird or he wants to keep you hidden, he's either in a relationship or hoping to get someone back. Shouting at you and creating arguments isn't something you should put up with, he's not a keeper.

Yeah he def has a daughter! I’ve heard her on video calls and he sends me pics of them together. His mum talks about her all the time. We have a caravan together and he’s got framed photos of her at her christening etc. I have no doubt that he’s only with me. But I feel uncomfortable with the length of time it’s taking him to introduce us, also the social media thing.

Yeah all the time. She’s got pictures of them together on her insta x

Oh god that’s awful!

He promises you'll meet then creates an argument to stall? He purposely forces you into a state of arguing to delay?

Thats enough grounds right there to walk away.

Why do you put up with this??

How old is his daughter?

12 today! It’s her bday

Why are you putting up with the behaviour from him, being spoken too like that. Regardless of not meeting her girl I think you need to move on.

Sounds very sus.
Have you been to his house?
Met any of his friends?

Could it be that he thinks it might create distance between him and his daughter? (Speaking from experience...)

Also, does his daughter know about you?

Maybe the daughter’s mum isn’t keen on you meeting her, and has put a ban in place? He could be under pressure from her.

Maybe his daughter doesn’t want to meet you but rather than tell you that he makes excuses. He can’t force her to.

Whatever the situation with his daughter this man shouts at you get run

Hi yes she does, she wears my clothes etc that I have at her dad and I’d caravan. His mum tells me she asks to meet me all the time. I’m baffled