a sex hurdle - how do we get over it?

[phlossie]

The last time we had sex was to help induce labour... I would really like to (and have done on and off since dc2 was about 5 weeks), but dh isn't doing any coming on, and I feel a bit weird about my body so not confident about initiating things. I told him last night that if he made the moves, I wouldn't say no... It's turning into a bit of a thing.
Any ideas?
We have two dcs - 5mo, and 2yo. The littlest one doesn't sleep.

Yes, dh and I have this prob too. I don't know what to suggest really

may sound a bit naff, but could you have a sign that you put out so he feels that you are definately up for it..something you have agreed ahead of time..
if you have a bath after you have put the littlies to bed and light a candle in the bedroom it is your way of saying "NOW...Please!!!"
That way you don't have to say it and he will feel confident also that he isn't going to get knocked back?

once you get back into the swing of things you will be fine.. a temporary hurdle..

Good luck

could you have a bit of booze and watch a sexy film - Secretary or something like that? Although that must be difficult to arrange if the little one doesn't sleep

Maybe you could do something during the day beforehand to boost your self-esteem a bit - visit to the hairdresser's, or a facial?

just pretend that you are a courting couple who are not ready for sex yet. just rule it out and concentrate on the occasional snog and grope not in the bedroon. this will take the pressure off and help you see the signals again

Secretary's a great film!
I'd love to get a bit tipsy, but I'm breastfeeding (another turn off for us both - no-one wants an eyefull of breastmilk when they're on the job).
But I like the self-esteem boosting idea - and the courting, witchandchips. (DH will laugh at the 'not ready for sex yet' thing - we only waited three weeks when we first got together!!)

Know what you mean about the BF thing - DH saw them as purely for feeding the baby but like witchandchips said, just bring back some romance first and worry about the sex thing once you're more confident.

Do you have anyone to babysit for a few hours so you can go for a meal/cinema etc?