Aibu?, quite open to be told I am.
In a relationship for 3 years. We are both in late 30s, don’t live together.
Partner is going through some money issues due to being out of work for a while. Now has new job.
I work full time, ok paid job but not amazingly paid, I’m certainly feeling the cost of living crisis but making ends meet just.
Anyway, my issue is, I was away with a group of friends for 5 nights. Long awaited trip and so much fun to catch up with my mates.
I came back and partner didnt want to come and see me on my day back as he said he had to work the next day and wanted to go to his local pub and then go back to his so he was organised for the next day for work.
I took slight offence to this as I’d not seen him for ages and I couldn’t meet him or go to his as I had my child that night, so I suggested he meet his mates then come to mine. But he said he didn’t want to mess around even though I live a ten min if that drive away.
I was cross and said well don’t be surprised if I make plans with my mates tomorrow night.
I felt like he was more bothered about the pub and seeing his mates than seeing me after I’d been away for nearly a week.
The next night he made plans to meet his mate at the pub, fair enough as i said I’d probably make plans. I was a bit miffed but told him to enjoy his night.
Then he messages me at 10pm that night and asks to come over. I said no as I feel an after thought.
That was that.
Today we were going to meet. He says what do you want to do. I said maybe a walk and a drink at the local although I have to be up early tomorrow so just one or two.
He says yes but I’m not paying extra for your drinks ( my wine costs more than his pint by about a quid or 2 max)
This annoyed me- he’s managed to go out drinking all weekend then makes an issue about paying a bit more for my drink?
I wouldn’t even ask him to pay and we usually go 50/50, but he’s making an issue my drink costs slightly more.
He says he’s skint and I’m not understanding.
I said your priorities are wrong and for him to bring that up/ make an issue that my drinks cost more makes me feel rubbish, especially as he didn’t give a fuck when he was spending his money when with friends all weekend.
It’s not about money, it’s how he is prioritising his time and care.
Apparently I live in my own world and don’t understand.
AIBU?