3 years too soon to be engaged?

[3YearsIn]

Boyfriend proposed last weekend and I said yes. It was beautiful, low key and we are both so happy. We celebrated 3 years together in April, and have been living together since last August/September

My sister told me today she thinks we’re moving too fast, and that 3 years is too soon to be engaged. We don’t plan on actually getting married until 2025 (due to work commitments), so we’d be 5 years in by the time we get married. Sister still thinks this is too soon. For context, I’m 33, boyfriend is 34. My sister is older than both of us but had a 10 year relationship before getting engaged.

have asked her and she said he’s not the issue. She’s all for us getting married but thinks we should wait 10 years like she did.

Do what makes you happy not your sister! I met DH when I was 33, we got engaged a year later and married the year after that.

Short relationship/enagagement!!? Splutter - only compared to your sister!! You're in your 30s, I understand if you have had issues in the past that led to your sister being protective (she also seems to live in the 1800s..) If you are now living a healthy independent adult life, time to cut the apron strings, same as you would for parents. Have a lovely life 🙂💕

I'm just going to say congratulations, you both sound like nice people who are going to be really happy 😊

We were together for 17 years till we got married & then married for 20 years till MS took her 😪I only wished we had been married sooner but these things only come to you later.

Three years?!? I thought the thing was after a year you should 'know'. I got engaged after six weeks, so...

We were engaged after a year of dating and married four months later. Short engagements were the norm when we were married 30 years ago. Congratulations!

I married my DH when we'd only been together 11months. 15 years ago! If you know you know! Congratulations 🥳

Meeting someone in your 20s and meeting someone in your 30s is very different. You are at a different stage of your life when you're in your 30s and more settled and know what you want long term. I met my husband in my 30s and we were married with in the year but there's noway I would have made such a commitment in my 20s. You are fine enjoy your engagement.

We were talking about marriage on our third date. Engaged six weeks after we met. Married five months after we met.

Celebrated 20 years this spring.

Most of my friends were engaged within 12-18 months and married within three years (back in nineties), and are coming up for 25-30 years anniversaries.

Ten years seems a huge time to get engaged! Jealousy?

It would be interesting to see the stats of how long-lasting marriages were when the engagement occurred after 10 years compared to other durations.

I don't know, but my hunch is that those that the stats for those waiting 10 years aren't great, and they generally waited so long because they had doubts that they eventually decided to overlook, or felt pressured to marry despite not really wanting to. Waiting that for that length of time doesn't indicate healthy caution, it's smacks of deep seated reluctance or doubt.

I'm glad she's acknowledged this is her infantilising you rather than you being somehow wrong. 3 years is not rushed.

No approach is necessarily wrong but what does she think is to be gained from waiting 10 years when you've known each other ages and are mature enough to know your own minds?

If she starts again, ask her this rather than placating her by saying it'll be another XX years anyway. This is your and DP's joint decision as adults.

3 years sounds like the "perfect" amount of time for marriage tbh, I didn't think that anyone would be able to object to it being either too hasty or too long. So I'm surprised at your sister- and especially at your ages (being established adults, not 21 year olds)

We were officially engaged in a year and married 6 months later. Fully acknowledge that was fairly speedy but 2-3 years to engagement and marriage a year later is very common I would have thought!

The people I know who waited 5-8 years met young and were waiting to reach mid-late twenties with more maturity and career stability.