3 years too soon to be engaged?

[3YearsIn]

Boyfriend proposed last weekend and I said yes. It was beautiful, low key and we are both so happy. We celebrated 3 years together in April, and have been living together since last August/September

My sister told me today she thinks we’re moving too fast, and that 3 years is too soon to be engaged. We don’t plan on actually getting married until 2025 (due to work commitments), so we’d be 5 years in by the time we get married. Sister still thinks this is too soon. For context, I’m 33, boyfriend is 34. My sister is older than both of us but had a 10 year relationship before getting engaged.

Well, if you'd have waited 10 years there wouldn' be much of a chance for either a niece or a nephew! Congratulations. I'm glad your sister is loving and supportive, I'm sure she will make a lovely SIL and aunt.

We had been married for a year and we’d had our daughter together on our third anniversary.

Congratulations on your engagement.

Congratulations!

and I think this is the perfect timing - if he really wasn't sure after 3 years then how much more sure he'd feel after another 3?

We started dating one March, got engaged in November the same year and married the following September.
Married for 30+ years

No 3 years is the perfect amount of time, especially in your 30’s. Congratulations!

Got engaged after 1.5 years and married within 3 years! If it feels right, do it! When u know u know. All that matters is what the two of you think!

Not if it feels right for you. My husband and I got together December 2008, engaged April 2010 and married in January 2011, so we've now been married 12 years. Other people prefer to do a long engagement. There's no right or wrong way to do it.

I’ve been married 23 years now @3YearsIn
We got engaged after a year and married after 18 months (granted we had other reasons to have the marriage so soon after).

Living together fur 10 years doesn’t protect you from ‘closing badly’. It just means separation might be easier to sort out.

Plus if you are planning to chase children, you certainly do not want to wait 10 years anyway (and I’d strongly advise you to be married before having children)

There is no right or wrong time in my opinion. Dh proposed after 4 months but didn't actually get officially engaged until a year after starting dating and married a year later. Now coming up on over 35 years married.
A friend of mine her mum and dad got married 6 months after they met and engaged at the 3 month mark. Very happily married until one passed away.

I wouldn't personally get engaged until a date for the wedding was set and was actively planning. Just in case. I would want to minimise the risk of a failed engagement.
Probably why DH and I were together nine years before we got engaged as felt too young to be actually married before that.
Congratulations!

I think based on your ages, it is not at all rushed and perhaps even a bit slow.

Your sister sounds jealous. How awful that she can't just be happy for you.

DH and I bought our house after 8 months, engaged after 15 months and married on our 2 year anniversary.

There's no right timescale. As long as you're both happy.

If you were late teens or early 20s then yeah long engagements make a lot of sense, but by 2025 you will both be 35 & 36 and like you said have been together 5 years, so in no way is it too soon if you've both been intentional about getting to know all the things you want to know about each other, and the relationship feels right and your values are aligned with one another. I know quite a few people who have gotten engaged after a year or even just straight married after a year and are still together many years later

It’s not too fast at all, especially if you want to wait until you’re married to start trying for children.

Definitely not too short a time, when you know, you know. We got engaged after 18 months and married 3 months later, still together 35 years later.

DH and I had a one year old and a mortgage together by the time we’d been together 3 years, we met when we were mid thirties and decided we didn’t want to waste any time trying for a baby.

Your sister is talking nonsense.

Sounds perfect!! Congratulations to you both

Your sister sounds nuts.

Not too soon. Me and my husband were engaged, married and had a baby within 3 years of meeting. 15 years later we’re still really happy.

We do have a date. We’re planning on April 2025, around our 5 year anniversary. This was actually “planned” before he proposed, as we’ve been discussing marriage for a few months now. April is a very sentimental month for us (we started dating then, some family members birthdays, etc) and 2025 is just the next available date where we won’t have something or other distracting us

For my sister with her relationship, 3 years would have been too soon as they’d have both only been 24. My BIL was only finishing college at that age (though it was a master’s after his original degree)

We bought an engagement ring around 15 months in, and he would have proposed then if circumstances had been different. We got engaged at 18 months.

We were 29 and 30 then, I just feel like I knew what I wanted and didn't need to spend longer finding out.

Oh we’ve had many in depth discussions about the future. Living together since last August, spent lots of time together and apart, with family and without family. Discussed children, finances, career goals. We have even discussed, and this might sound a bit weird, what would happen if we broke up. I’ve never met a man so easy to talk to, and who is so honest with his own life plans. When we were just friends (for a short amount of time) we would always have these in depth discussions about life in general. He’s very philosophical, but he’s not away with the clouds either. Apparently he’s always been like this. His grandmother once said his soul had been here before, because he was far too wise for his age even as a child.

Got engaged after 15 months and married 8 months later. Been married 9 years.

Your sister is being ridiculous. It's not protective, it's controlling.

You can get engaged any time you like and I think 3 years is more than reasonable.

She may have waited 10 years but that's her story, not yours.

Congratulations and do whatever you and your soon to be husband want. Sister can butt out x