Husband has terrible wind and foul smelling bowel movements. I am not sure how much longer I can take it.

[Newnamemummy]

Husband of 30+ years developed a hernia years ago.
Has been refused an operation as he won't lose weight. He has now developed foul smelling poos and stinks out the whole house. He also farts throughout the night. He has been tested for bowel cancer and he tells me it was negative.
He is spotlessly clean but I no longer fancy certain types of sex if any. He has bed breath too.
My mother died of bowel cancer as did his father. He takes a stomach tablet. I feel we have lost our relationship and sex life. The smell makes me gag. I wasn't even good with nappies.
What do I do?

Charcoal tablets might ease it a bit. VIP poo spray for before using the toilet and shut the lid straight after getting off.

However, the cause needs investigating.

If it’s relatively new, please get him to go to the doctor to rule out something potentially very serious. There are conditions like ischaemic bowel disease that have symptoms like this and they can get very serious very quickly.

I work with perfume. I have a nose like a bloodhound. However the DC complain.
Lots of great ideas, thank you. I will get some peppermint tablets. He bought charcoal crackers. Admittedly the operation was refused over eight years ago. He is super tall gentle giant and when he had his investigations the consultant was scared of the risks. I think he frightened him.
Milk and bread will change immediately.

For my DH this was all a sign of something really serious, I wish we'd known sooner but we didn't. If this is relatively new I would do everything in my power to get him to go back to the GP for further tests.

@CopperSeahorses I have tried but he says he is too busy. We just lost a family member and he might be scared.
I hope you are OK.

It sounds like a good intolerance. He needs to try eliminating various things one at a time to see if it makes a difference. Start with lactose for a couple of weeks, if no difference try gluten, if no difference try nightshades, if no difference try onion and all related things like garlic, chives etc. you will probably hit on the culprit that way.

also, a really good probiotic will help. Symprove is super expensive but practically neutralises fart odour in my experience so that combined with removing anything he’s intolerant to may help.

if none of that helps, back to the doctors with him.

Why won't he lose weight?

That alone would be a complete turn off.

@EllaRaines he has lost weight as have I. We're both tall and big. That's not the issue only in that he needs to push the operation now he is smaller.

Has he been tested for coeliacs disease? Its massively underdiagnosed.

I am posting on here as IRL no one would get it. I told my closest friend and she laughed but she doesn't live with a partner. They think I am talking about man farts only.

@Higgeldypiggeldy35 not as far as I am aware.
I have a friend with that condition. I was under the impression that someone would have difficulty being large?

Would he consider doing the low fodmap diet to try and find if there is a specific trigger? It's really restrictive, and takes quite a while to do the process, but should identify if it's a food/s causing it.

As for making the whole house smell when he goes to the loo, he needs to be more considerate. He knows it's bad, he needs to be opening the window before he goes, flushing immediately, not sitting there on his phone or whatever if he's prone to that, using an odour neutraliser, and closing the toilet door leaving the window open after he's done. Also should be going to the toilet to fart, not just spreading it around the house without a care. Overnight is a problem, he's not able to control it while he sleeps. Any way you could have seperate rooms for a bit and he sleeps with the door shut and the window open? Might make him more likely too go to the Dr too if it shows how seriously you're affected by it?

I've got IBD, so believe me, I understand shit stinks! But really, he needs to cop on and make an effort.

Try fart-catching underwear: https://www.myshreddies.com/

It's a thing, honestly!

Also activated charcoal tablets - the biscuits won't make a difference. Try these: https://www.hollandandbarrett.com/shop/product/holland-barrett-charcoal-capsules-260mg-6100128004?skuid=046915&utm_campaign=shopping&utm_medium=cpc&utm_source=google&gclid=Cj0KCQjw4s-kBhDqARIsAN-ipH1zmlJnBWRuafAtRmpgDR8rMsxx56UBl-rF-vOesucegI8zslnhD1IaAqAVEALw_wcB&gclsrc=aw.ds

Surely he needs to do his business, keep bathroom window open, spray a decent air freshener, shut door behind him. Surely the smell wouldn’t travel then would it? Same as at night, can you keep a window ajar? And first thing, open all windows to air it all a bit?

I agree he needs to go back and try and get the hernia sorted. He should also be given a scan because the hernia could have worsened to a partial blockage so food literally sits and rots in his guts and is then only occasionally pushed through but is so far decomposed that he will have lots of gas that smells like a dead cat, he will have bloating, discomfort and yes it will cause bad breath too.

Id also consider going to an allergist to be tested for food intolerances. It’s the fastest way to find out what foods he is reacting to. It might be dairy, wheat- but you could go dairy and gluten free without realising oops it’s actually corn or he is also sensitive to beans. I’m doing the same for my DH as no matter what he eats he seems to always have acid reflux, bloating and gas (normal gas though- his hernia was fixed when they took out his gall bladder).

This could be down to lots of different health issues. If he is belching a lot he may have an ulcer. for this your gp needs to refer him for a camera survey. does he have diarrhoea as he may have ulcerative colitis. my dh suddenly got this and my god the shit smell was vile (and I have worked in a mortuary and an abbatoir so nothing usually phases me). He urgently needs to back to his gp for some proper further investigations in this. its not normal to have this and it wont just go away on its own. so either its another 30 years for you or he gets to the gp and gets this all sorted.

@Moveoverdarlin sadly the whiffgoes through doors!

Yes, Activated charcoal tablets. The carbon absorbs the gases and hopefully a lot of the smell, worth a try maybe.

@mummymeister the smell is in the last two years.
He had a camera years ago. Nothing since other than the poo kit. We have had a lot of family troubles and he hides at work. He never goes to the doctor (which was mad as he wanted to be one, long story).
At least people are not telling me I am being a cow. One friend told me to divorce him!

Severe acid reflux can cause really bad foul smelling wind and diarrhea and stinky burps and it is a persistent problem until you take something like Omeprazole daily. Sometimes 20mg a day is not enough and you may need 40mg. If this has not already been explored I would look in to this and request medication. You can also buy it over the counter. I'm not saying it is this, but it is one strong possibility based on symptoms.

This sounds like my dh and cutting dairy has sorted it 100%

@NotMyFinestMoment dh takes Omeprazole.

Also request a test for Coeliac disease. Don't cut out gluten before having the test.

P.S. I haven't read the full thread so apologies if someone has already mentioned my suggestions.

He may need a higher dose. I have the same symptoms when mine is not controlled with enough medicine. When it's bad, I take 40mg the rest of the time just 20mg. Try adjusting the dose and make sure he takes it same time every day so the stomach acid doesn't build up again before the next dose.

Lol, "in sickness and in health" my arse... (quite literally)

I don't get how people are saying divorce over this... on the scale of things, that has to be pretty low, and low of people to suggest it.