In praise of nice dh/dp's!!!

JoolsTide · 2004-12-10T19:11:18+00:00

I'm not having a go at anyone but there have been a few threads about some not very nice men and I have every sympathy with their partners BUT I'd like to redress the balance and praise the nice guys! My dh is lovely and I love him to bits - sure he gets on my nerves at times and we've had our spats but it makes life interesting! So here's to you dh - you're very special!

partywigandredrobe · 10/12/2004 19:24

Without my DH, I would have gone to pieces years ago. When my whole world fell apart on the 14th of September, 1990, when I sat, holding my two year old son's hand as he lay in hospital bravely fighting menigitis, it was DH who took charge of everything.

Cruelly, and this where it gets bloody hard to type now, Ross lost his fight and where DH got the strength or energy from I'll never know, but he carried me through each long day and longer night.

So, to all the good guys out there, here's a toast to you.

sleepdeprived · 10/12/2004 19:29

Hear, hear!

A lot of women I know are very cynical and jaded about men in general - with good reason in some cases, given their experiences - but good men do exist, as evidenced by my DP. I think it's so important to acknowledge this, as it gives the rubbish ones less of an excuse to be that way - and less of a reason for their partners to accept crapness!

moondog · 10/12/2004 19:29

Hear hear Joolstide!
I am married to a wonderful man.
He's not a roses and jewellery sort of guy but he is a fantastic husband and father, works his tits off for us, and is rolling up his sleeves to help me out with ds and dd the moment he walks through the door.
He is the most organised person I know, is far better at housework than I am and takes it upon himself to do most of the domestic stuff as well as all the traditional manly stuff.
He even does all the stuff for me that I hate, like filling in forms and filling my car with petrol.

I have just joined him abroad after a long stint apart and his prime concern is that we will be happy while he is working. To that end, he has spent hours scouring the city for a ground floor flat (as I hate lifts!) and has equipped the entire flat entirely on his own (bought everything from dressing gowns for us four to wineglasses and a toilet brush.) He has set me up with satellite tv and the internet at home, and made enquiries and followed leads for me to get a p/time job when ds is a bit older.
He meets us for lunch and walks all the way home with me (ven though he has piles of work to do)
because I need a daily walk and the snow is so thick I can't manage the two children alone.

Finally, he has booked us a week in Dubai in january and a long w/end in Istanbul in February so that Iwill not be spending too much time cooped up at home with the children in the winter.

Oh-and as Iwrite, he is making me a cup of tea.

Truly a diamond of a man!

moondog · 10/12/2004 19:29

Hear hear Joolstide!
I am married to a wonderful man.
He's not a roses and jewellery sort of guy but he is a fantastic husband and father, works his tits off for us, and is rolling up his sleeves to help me out with ds and dd the moment he walks through the door.
He is the most organised person I know, is far better at housework than I am and takes it upon himself to do most of the domestic stuff as well as all the traditional manly stuff.
He even does all the stuff for me that I hate, like filling in forms and filling my car with petrol.

I have just joined him abroad after a long stint apart and his prime concern is that we will be happy while he is working. To that end, he has spent hours scouring the city for a ground floor flat (as I hate lifts!) and has equipped the entire flat entirely on his own (bought everything from dressing gowns for us four to wineglasses and a toilet brush.) He has set me up with satellite tv and the internet at home, and made enquiries and followed leads for me to get a p/time job when ds is a bit older.
He meets us for lunch and walks all the way home with me (ven though he has piles of work to do)
because I need a daily walk and the snow is so thick I can't manage the two children alone.

Finally, he has booked us a week in Dubai in january and a long w/end in Istanbul in February so that Iwill not be spending too much time cooped up at home with the children in the winter.

Oh-and as Iwrite, he is making me a cup of tea.

Truly a diamond of a man!

Original poster

JoolsTide · 10/12/2004 19:33

hurrah! thought I was alone there for a minute

wigandrobe no words, but my heart goes out to you - CANNOT imagine.

well said sleepdeprived and moondog your dh truly does sound like a diamond! we're sooooo lucky!

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TheHollyAndTheTwiglett · 10/12/2004 19:33

My DH is the strongest person I know

Despite having a chronic debilitating disease which sometimes leaves him unable to get up, he deals with life amazingly stoically.

Everyone thinks I'm the stronger one, I'm certainly the more vocal (no I hear you cry, but yes honestly I am quite chatty ) .. but tbh I rely on his strength a lot

He is calm in the eye of the storm that is me, he can take everything I throw at him and still just raise an eyebrow in response

He is the bravest person I know because he fights pain every day

And he's currently upstairs bathing and bedding DS

einRosentsprungen · 10/12/2004 19:34

Oh lovely thread JoolsTide - just found out today that my nextdoor neighbours are splitting up, and feel very

My dh is fantastic too; he's very generous and very, very rarely self-centred; he's a wonderful dad to our two boys.

Last week he was fighting off a virus, and never complained once or suggested that I shouldn't disappear off for 2 days to the mumsnet meetup

Now I'm fighting off the virus and feeling lousy, and he offered to go and fetch the kids from school this afternoon (even though he was working), because I looked so grim.

What a special sweetie!

TheHollyAndTheTwiglett · 10/12/2004 19:35

OMG W&R .. I am so sorry .. I too cannot find the words

sleepdeprived · 10/12/2004 19:37

W&R, I am so sorry.

winterwarmmummer · 10/12/2004 19:38

What a coincidence, I was thinking the same the good dh/dps deserve a good write up every now and then.

W&R I am so sorry . You are right the good ones are so good.

dh is kind, loving, very very tollerant of my ranting and general irrational behaviour. Has changed countless nappies and gone solo with all 3 kids so that I can have time off. Has been truly magnificent thro 3 deliveries even though I bit him in the 3rd!

Also has the distinction of being v good at bd!

Hope that's not too much info!

Slink · 10/12/2004 19:39

partywigandredrobe..so sorry

My dh is too a star love him to bits and is a fab dad ver hands on..most of the bickering is about who shall put dd to bed and read to her.

I raise my glass (of coke don't drink) to my manxxxx

Gobbledigoose · 10/12/2004 19:40

I'm adding my dh to the list of good ones too!

He moved 250 miles away from all his family and friends to settle with me in my home town - changed his career and struggled through the first year of his job which he hated but couldn't leave because we were expecting ds1 and had taken on a large mortgage.

He worked through and now he loves his job and does really well.

He's great with our ds's - takes them out to the park or swimming while I get on with chores/work. He does most of the bathing and just hits the ground running when he gets in from work. He's a brilliant Daddy and our ds's think he's the business!

He takes a lot from me - I'm a perfectionist and I suppose I give him more grief than he deserves, but he puts up with it and still loves me to pieces - brings me flowers and buys me cards, goes out to the shop late at night for chocolate (!), slept on the floor of our bedroom for the last 2 months of my pregnancy so I could sleep. He also deals with all 3 ds's in the morning before he leaves for work, while I go to the gym! He is always telling me how gorgeous I am which is much needed after 3 pregnancies and a saggy tum!

There's so much more I could say about him too. He is truly amazing and I'm sooo lucky. Here's big kisses to my DH!!!

Gobbledigoose · 10/12/2004 19:42

W&R - my heart goes out to you xxx

glamwigandboozepocketrobe · 10/12/2004 19:46

Thank you everyone for your kindness. Next time someone opens a bar, the sherberts are on me

MistltAeroAndWine · 10/12/2004 20:02

This is a lovely thread JT - my dh's is a star too, though he can really get up my nose at times, but, that makes it all the more special as we work together to make our relationship work and we depend very much on each other.
W&R - - I had no idea, and am so sorry you lost your little boy - your post really moved me as I know it's so easy to be complacent and take our families/children for granted. That must have been the most difficult time for you and it's lovely to read that your dh was such a support for you as I'm sure you were and are for him.

IwigitcouldbeXmaseveryday · 10/12/2004 20:09

Thank you. As I said before, I have been deeply moved and touched by all your kind words. There is a wonderful end to this. 2.5 years ago, at the grand old age of 41 (creak), I became a mum again to another boy, Nicholas, who now talks non stop of Santa and what a good boy he is

OnZephyrstdayofXmas · 10/12/2004 20:11

:( for your first dear little one w&r and a big for your Nicholas!!

Reading all these I feel really guilty now for having a go at dp. In all fairness he is actually a lovely guy, who has gone through a lot in the last 3 years and we've stuck it out and are hanging in there. When he's good, he's really good, just a shame he's being a git lately!!!

Willowmum · 10/12/2004 20:18

Glad to hear life is good again for you W&R.

Would like to add my dp (soon to be dh!) to the list. He had a brain tumour removed earlier this year, was diagnosed when dd was 7 weeks old. The day after the op, I thought I was losing him. The thought of trying to explain to dd as she grew up what kind of man her Daddy was and how much he loved her was unbearable.

However - he is now fine, fully recovered - Hoorah! We are enjoying being a family and don't take a single minute for granted. Fingers crossed the tumour will stay away.

winterwarmmummer · 10/12/2004 20:19

Don't feel guilty - that's the whole point of MN. A chance to say what you actually feel. It can't be roses all the time can it??

IwigitcouldbeXmaseveryday · 10/12/2004 20:20

{{{{{{Hugs for Willow}}}}}}}}

Willowmum · 10/12/2004 20:22

Willow sends hugs back. Or should that be snores as she is asleep right now!!

jabberwocky · 10/12/2004 20:29

Congratulations on your little Nicholas W&R.

DH deserves a medal for putting up with everything that's gone on with me this year. He is my lifeboat of sanity

IwigitcouldbeXmaseveryday · 10/12/2004 20:31

Tonights special guest appearance is...WillowDAD!

Janos · 10/12/2004 20:35

Hmm, guilty as charged! I would like to point that my dp really is generally lovely otherwise I wouldn't be with him. I think we are both just adjusting to being new parents.

Just wanted to say wigandrobe, I know you posted on my thread and how sorry I am about your little boy. Can't imagine what it would have been like for you - your DH sounds fantastic.

So I agree 3 cheers for the good guys.

Original poster

JoolsTide · 10/12/2004 20:36

WOW - there are some great stories on here - its wonderful

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