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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Awkward around DH

102 replies

247 · 18/02/2008 14:27

This is weird but I would like some feedback please. A few years ago DH wanted to leave as he no longer loved me. He stayed but our relationship never got back on track. Infact it is non existant, there is NO physical contact whatsoever. I feel so sad and lonely. I always hoped we would get over this and continue a long life together. I do still love him (call me a fool) and I do not want to be a single mum and give access to the DC every other wkend. We talk as normal but never about personal stuff, usually just his work, he is very successful. I feel I was put out to graze a few years ago and he is just not coming back to me. It has reached a point now that I am just so and lonely, like all the time, and I am now even feeling embarrassed to sit close to him on the sofa.

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skyatnight · 18/02/2008 21:47

I read somewhere that 9 out of 10 highly-successful (in the career sense) people are borderline psychopaths (although not necessarily with homocidal tendencies!). I sometimes wonder also whether some of these people are at the very highly-functioning end of an autistic spectrum - i.e. very able in most ways but don't understand emotions. (I expect I will get shot down for saying this.)

Milou, 247, do either of them have a significant sense of humour (just curious)?

My xp had a sense of humour (of sorts) but was very unemotional, lacking in empathy and compassion. He is also very intelligent and successful. I found it soul-destroying to try and 'co-exist' with him. I was too, in his words, stroppy, however, to manage it for long; too much of a nuisance to him with my requests for communication and attempts at achieving mutual understanding - so the relationship fell apart.

Some men are designed to live alone, self-sufficient.

247 · 18/02/2008 23:16

skyatnight, his humour is largely dependent on other peoples misfortunes .

Milou2, I'm sad for you because I know how utterly painful this existance is. He has gone to bed (early), after I have scarcly acknowledged him all night. He refuses to ask whats wrong though. Basically I am feeling just toosad to talk to him tonight and now I am crying my heart out alone, again.

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dittany · 18/02/2008 23:17

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

247 · 18/02/2008 23:19

I know I cant, i'm peices everyday, but I just want us tobe happy together, the thought of splitting crucifies me.

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247 · 19/02/2008 07:21

He gave me a valentie card and 12red roses thats why I still THINK he cares, am I being niaive? Did he feel it was the obligatory thing to do? He can and does provide 'things', just not emotions. I guess he never really did really but I was so wrapped up in TTC and then dealing with the babies I guess I didnt notice. DC are older now and I have more time to give of myself and now I notice how it is.

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Wisteria · 19/02/2008 08:20

So possibly he can't display emotion - some people can't naturally but it can be learnt. My Dad never could but it was only after Mum passed away that we understood the reasons for it.

I know he probably won't want to and it will be difficult for him, but you do need to talk this through and force him to acknowledge your emotions without the 'nothing is ever good enough for you' approach.
The way I see it you either take the bull by the horns and make him talk to you properly or you leave. There has to be some compromise somewhere from both sides.

Can it all be written down in a letter? Could you show him this thread or would that just make him too angry?

Wisteria · 19/02/2008 08:25

I forgot the other option......which is to stay married and find your love and affection elsewhere. I don't advise it personally.

247 · 19/02/2008 08:40

He wont acknowledge my emotions, he always tells me I am mad or paranoid, that I have to accept not everyone thinks or feels the way I do about things. Yes, he would be furious to read this thread. He thinks chat rooms are for sados and morons [sad}. I tried to force a reaction a couple of months ago and suggested an open marriage as I needed love and attention. First he said he didnt know what I meant and then said not much really. I think he was perhaps stunned but still nothing changed after that.

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247 · 19/02/2008 08:48

I wouldn't cheat on him, I cannot accept that some people do, in my book it is totally wrong.

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green · 19/02/2008 08:58

Hi 247. I've been reading this thread, struck by some similarities but unsure what to say. (I have a thread at the mo called should i just get overmyself). The similarity is in the inability/unwillingness to really communicate and share our lives rather than co-exisitng.
Do you think you are seeking his approval rather than his love? Just a question?
skyatnight - I'm really interested in your story. I'm more in the place of thinking of leaving than you 247 and would love to hear more about what broke the camels back IYKWIM and how you moved on?

247 · 19/02/2008 09:42

Have just read your thread green, how are things for you right now? Your replies from Witheringhieghts really jumped out at me, she talks a lot of sense. i.e. husband and wife not being emotionally compatible. That makes complete sense to me and could very well be a reason why my DH resents me, because I don't see where he is coming from. We are very different.

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skyatnight · 19/02/2008 12:56

Green - hmm, interesting. You can read some of the rest of my story on the 'have found out my dp is married' thread.

We were engaged to be married. He had pursued me relentlessly, swept me off my feet, etc.. About a year in, we moved in together but I still didn't know him that well as he was often away and we hadn't really spent a lot of time together. I found that he was a totally different person to live with, virtually ignored me, unaffectionate, distant....

I was unhappy but reluctant to give up on the relationship. I talked to him about it and he seemed not to know what the problem was. I gave him an ultimatum and said that if he didn't show me more attention and if we didn't do more together, then I might leave. He was very keen for us to have a child. I had intended to wait until we were married to do things right but he persuaded me that, as he was older than me, he wanted to just get on with it. I had misgivings but he seemed so sure that was what he wanted so I went along with it. Thinking it was a good sign, that things would improve. It happened very quickly. He appeared excited about the pregnancy for about a day and then, without warning,

he ended the relationship and told me to get a termination.

I was in a state of shock. His explanation was that the pregnancy was making me moody, we needed more time on our own, he had changed his mind. Could I have a termination and then we could try again later. He told me I didn't love him. We had gone to buy an engagement ring before I knew I was pregnant. I felt sick that day and asked if we could go back another day. He said I didn't want to get married because I hadn't got the ring that day.

It all happened so quickly. You will read on the other thread that he then told me more about himself that I hadn't previously known that showed me that I didn't really know him.

Anyway, this is a hijack on this thread. I don't think my situation then is really similar to yours or 247's. The only similarity I saw to 247s was his coldness. He made me feel like I was his possession. He wanted me, he got me, then he lost interest. No interest in me as a person. No remorse, no guilt. I had been taken in by a conman. He was depressed but, after repeated attempts at communication, I got the feeling that he didn't have a clue what I was talking about. He didn't even see his actions as cruel. Like talking to a robot.

milou2 · 19/02/2008 16:04

Skyatnight - I was sort of pursued/pressured by my husband to live with him/marry him/be with him. Even my father said I didn't have to marry the first man who wanted to marry me.

His sense of humour involves laughing at Irish people and imitating Scottish accents, also those video clips of people falling over at weddings and tripping over onto their heads. He says I don't have a sense of humour.

Your last paragraph is one I could have written, coldness, no guilt/remorse, no perception of right or wrong, no connection or understanding of what I'm saying, yet I know I'm just an ordinary real person, even the postman and total strangers react in a normal way to me.

247 - I'm so sorry you feel so sad about how things are. Can you hug a lovely warm hot water bottle at night? Even buy yourself a beautiful little teddy? I've got great pleasure out of starting to do stuff like that for myself and the children. We have big fluffy dressing gowns and lots of pillows. I know it sounds very materialistic, but it is physical and real and a visible sign of care and comfort.

My reaction tends to be anger or anxiety, not crying, so I don't know what to say re the crying, whether to cry it all out or what.

green - yes, I want to know more about what it feels like when you know it is time to leave.

247 · 20/02/2008 09:09

He actually put his arm around me in bed last night (albeit for a few seconds) and kissed me goodnight {shock} . I had spent the evening sitting with him and talking generally about nothing. I am amazed. I am going to try my hardest to be super smiley and chatty. Was discussing this with a friend yesterday and basically we both came to the same conclusion, DH and I are both keeping our distance for fear of rejection. Since DH is providing for us I guess he is feeling unappreciated and let down by my distance so I am going for it. Turning the tables and not thinking of me anymore but thinking of him. I really do FINALLY think this is all that will be required. If he then starts showing some warmth to me then I will be happier and we will be happier together. Hope that makes sense.

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Karen999 · 20/02/2008 09:10

Glad to hear it 247...sometimes its just takes little things to help get you back on track....good luck...x

Wisteria · 20/02/2008 09:24

247 - that's wonderful baby steps are good!

WiiMii · 20/02/2008 09:29

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

247 · 20/02/2008 09:32

Thanks you so much everyone

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Wisteria · 20/02/2008 09:35

I have broken the ice before now with dp by putting a little note in his sandwiches/ briefcase ;-)

Sometimes I think we have to go back to 'courting' again to rebuild bridges. In an effort to mend my broken marriage many years ago I took xdh back to Paris where we lived when we met.

green · 20/02/2008 09:36

Hi 247. Maybe there was something in the air yesterday as I am feeling more positive too. Dh actually asked if I wanted to go out last night so we went for a meal together and had a nice time.
I put to him a suggestion which I have been thinking of. I said I would give Sheffield a year - fully trying to make it work. I am going to get a new job so I can meet people and re take up some of my hobbies etc, and we are going to make an effort to do more together including walking in the peaks which are so close.
If after a year things still aren't working then I asked him if he would feel it was reasonable to agree to move back to London. He didn't commit to London (he has ideas to move to West Country preferably) but said yes, we could then arrange to move and my needs will be given weight at that time.
So, I am feeling much better and much more positive too. We are going skiing next week which I am really looking forward to and he will have to stop working and enjoy himself which hopefully means he may be a little less distracted. So feeling good too. Hooray.
(I am going to just copy and paste this into my thread too!).

247 · 20/02/2008 09:48

Great news green, I am really happy for you. Enjoy the ski-ing, time spent together will hopefully improve things. We are going away at easter and cannot wait. I feel very positive about the future. If we don't try then I guess we only have ourselves to blame. We have to be bigger than them, afterall they are so childlike, when I think about it it doesn't really take so much to make them feel appreciated and then they in turn treat us in a nicer manner. Hi Five green

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247 · 20/02/2008 09:50

Thats a good one Wisteria, I will give it a go. I'm sure it would put a big smile on his face. Either that or suddenly get very confused and wonder what I was up to, either way, it will provoke thought

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skyatnight · 20/02/2008 12:29

I'm glad you and green are feeling more positive. You may not be 100% happy in your marriages but they do seem stable. Your husbands are reliable. You are lucky.

(I have had a really rough time. Maybe sometimes I am guilty of projecting what happened to me onto other people's relationships. I think I have come to terms with it but it is really hard ever fully to come to terms with something like that.

I do have some regrets about the way I handled things with dd's father. It was a very stressful time and I was very enotional. Knowing what I do now, I realise that it was pointless to try and communicate with him in the way that I did. But he is a very strange man and so I am confident that nothing I could have done would have prevented what happened and there is no way I could have lived with him, long-term. It was a huge mistake to ever get involved with him and I can't quite forgive myself for that.

From what I have worked out, he seems to want to make people do things to prove their love, then once he had achieved that, he loses interest. In my case, it was to have a baby with him. In another case, it was for someone to sell their flat, give up their job and move half way across the country. In another case, he had an affair with a married woman, got her to lave her husband and then dumped her. !!!!)

But perhaps my story will have served to make you realise that things could be a lot worse. As I said, I don't think your situation is much like mine. Your husband is honest but distant. He finds it difficult to show affection, appears cold.

From what we read in the self-help books, when a man is more right-brain, he takes requests for communication as reproaches and criticism. You in turn feel hurt and frustrated at his reaction and things get worse. I think you and many of the posters are right that if you do your best to be pretty and cheerful and affectionate and relaxed, he is more likely to open up with you because he will feel happier that you are happier. It seems a bit unfair that you have to see things their way all the time but, yes it is a bit like with children, they have fragile egos.

I don't think Green should 'get over herself' because we should all try to be as happy as we can be, including in our relationships. If you are really unhappy, leave, because you only live once. As a Mumsnetter reading your thread, I suppose it is a bit frustrating and I want to say: 'there's nothing serious wrong with your relationship but, if you are unhappy, DO something!!' But it must be so easy during that hectic time with small children to lose the romance and the connection between you. And so difficult to reestablish things sometimes. That doesn't mean that a marriage is doomed.

I suppose the moral is that it is not possible to find 100% of what you need in one person and you shouldn't expect to. It makes more sense to have friends who you can talk to who provide the missing bits and, as some other posters have said, to find comfort in other things or activities - beautiful flowers, fluffy towels, long walks, whatever pleases you and makes you happy in life.

Your last posts sound more hopeful. Good luck and best wishes.

247 · 21/02/2008 11:01

Thank you so so much for your kind words skyatnight, your last post was really kind. I hope YOU are ok.

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skyatnight · 21/02/2008 11:53

Yes, I'm ok 247. Luckily, I'm well-provided for financially which takes a lot of the strain out of being a single parent. But, like many of us, I'm still trying to understand the mysteries of life!!! Take care. xx

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