Can you hate a stranger?

[Aussiegirl123456]

Sorry, I didn’t know the best place to post this question.

Quick background:
Child’s old deputy teacher.

He arrived at the school when my child was in their final year at that school, so I had very little to do with him. For context, my child was unproblematic, never in trouble, great grades etc.

This man seems to hate my guts with a passion. Eg, at the school, whenever I was anywhere near him he’d turn his back. Gave me weird long stares. When the head teacher tried to introduce me to him, he literally ran away!

I didn’t care as my child was about to finish that school, so just ignored and went about my own business. My child has since left the school to go to high school. I thought that’d be the last I see of him.

I have just started a post grad course at uni and this flipping man is there with his weird stares, blatantly ignoring me when I’ve been in group work with him and just making me feel so uncomfortable. Mumbles god knows what when I am speaking. If I have to speak to him, he actually turns his back to ignore me!

Across the room, he just stares. I keep eye contact now until he looks away to piss him off.

I don’t care that he hates me, but if anyone can offer me any advice or can offer me some words of wisdom? It’s honestly getting to the point now that I want to drop out the course because it’s making me so uncomfortable. I tried to ask what his issue is, but….he turned his back to me when I asked and made a weird noise and walked off! He is super charming and over friendly with absolutely everyone else (including my child when they were at the school), so it’s definitely me.

Any ideas how to approach? I really don’t want to quit or postpone my course because of him but it looks like it’s going to end up that way.

By the way, this may be paranoia. I posted on social media (LinkedIn) I was about to begin this really niche course. The paranoid part of me feels he has seen this and signed up just to fuck me off. Nobody would do that, would they?

Posted too soon

The op's post on the 3 threads do seem somewhat contradictory

People often change details so they can’t be identified by people who know them.

OP this post has reminded me of someone I had almost forgotten about who did similar to me. The difference being we had originally got on ok enough to have short chats at work. Then suddenly cold shoulder, ignore, ‘humphing’ if I spoke etc. Turned out he found out I had a bf and decided I had in some way lead him on. Just by talking to him a few times. He had a whole invented relationship in his head and thought I’d betrayed him (told colleagues I was a cheat. Found out he’d previously been warned off another woman he stalked at work). So strange.

I think yes, most likely he saw your LinkedIn (in a previous post you say he visited your page) and joined the course quite on purpose.

On some odd level this tactic must have been successful for him in the past. I mean it is making you think of him a lot. Maybe it will force you to contact him, message him, speak with him etc etc and then he can invent some bullshit misunderstanding and you will be so relieved it’s resolved your guard will be down. And then he’ll see if you want to go for a drink sometime….

So in light of that, tell the tutors about needing to be separated from him. Grey rock him. Ignore it all. No need to drop out of your course. He might even drop out when he realises it hasn’t worked. Never be on your own with this man.

Good luck with the course.