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Original poster

I had covid and we had more sex...

14 replies

WhoDatWhoDere · 29/03/2023 11:10

In the whole 6 months before.

Why? Because I lost my sense of smell.

When DH and I got together we both hated smokers. Over the course of 20 years he became one, I still hated it.

He also drinks nothing but tea and full sugar coke.

Combine that with smoking and even right after brushing his teeth I can still smell the combination.

He also has issues with his molars, but the waiting list is huge for removal, so they're quite rotten.

I feel awful because I love him so much and he is GREAT in all aspects but I hear him in the bathroom brushing his teeth and I know he's going to try it on and I just dread kissing him or his face being directly in mine.

It's not poor dental hygiene because he does brush often, it's just the smoke and tea/coke lingers and especially the smoke on his hair, clothes everything just put me off.

It felt so good to be able to kiss him and not smell anything :(

OP posts:
Xrays · 29/03/2023 11:13

You need to tell him you’re not having sex with him or kissing him again unless he stops smoking. I couldn’t stand being with someone who smokes. Makes me feel sick just thinking about it. It was actually one of the reasons I divorced my first dh - he stopped smoking when we first got together and then started again and it just completely put me off him. (That and him being a cheating arsehole but the smoking didn’t help)!

AllOfThemWitches · 29/03/2023 11:13

Stale smoke is such a revolting smell, does he know how you feel?

I though you were going to say you were both isolating and bored. 😆

Original poster
WhoDatWhoDere · 29/03/2023 11:18

😂 Not bored no.

I do feel so bad because I love him so much.

He has said a few times he's going to give up but he gave up drinking too recently, it wasn't an alcoholic situation it just didn't agree with him on weekends, so he's done really well with that.

I feel mean bringing it up, but I will say to him 'sorry but your breath is really smoky' and he will say he's just brushed his teeth but it's still so prevelant.

He hates tuna so I say would you snog me after a tuna sandwich?! Always no 😂

OP posts:
Spottycarousel · 29/03/2023 11:18

I couldn't stand that either. Smokers have absolutely no idea how strong and revolting the smell of smoke is to everyone else. If all hes drinking is tea and Coke that wouldn't help either.

I think the only solution is to be honest with him and say its ruining sex for you.

Original poster
WhoDatWhoDere · 29/03/2023 11:20

Spottycarousel · 29/03/2023 11:18

I couldn't stand that either. Smokers have absolutely no idea how strong and revolting the smell of smoke is to everyone else. If all hes drinking is tea and Coke that wouldn't help either.

I think the only solution is to be honest with him and say its ruining sex for you.

Ive gained a little weight so maybe I could frame it as a joint health kick?

Give up the fizzy drinks.

I'll give up chocolate, you give up smoking.

I don't think the tea on its own would be an issue if he was drinking squash too.

OP posts:
Spottycarousel · 29/03/2023 11:22

WhoDatWhoDere · 29/03/2023 11:20

Ive gained a little weight so maybe I could frame it as a joint health kick?

Give up the fizzy drinks.

I'll give up chocolate, you give up smoking.

I don't think the tea on its own would be an issue if he was drinking squash too.

Show quote history

Sounds a good approach and one he's likely to respond well to. You could say eating healthily improves sexual stamina and enjoyment too!

Xrays · 29/03/2023 11:36

Smokers make me laugh when they think brushing their teeth gets rid of the smell. 🙄 It literally seeps out of their skin. It really is revolting.

IAteAllTheTomatoes · 29/03/2023 11:49

I know a lot of ex smokers who have up for no other reason that it was seriously damaging their love life.

Ask him if he enjoyed all the extra sex recently. Tell him you've just realised that's it's because you couldn't smell the smoke due to covid. He as to pick between smoking or sex. It should be an easy choice. Get him patched or whatever he needs to help.

MMmomDD · 29/03/2023 11:57

Personally - I’d start eating tuna regularly, and certainly have a little tuna snack before bed.

Sometimes a point needs a little practical illustration if it doesn’t sink in.

Original poster
WhoDatWhoDere · 29/03/2023 12:10

Xrays · 29/03/2023 11:36

Smokers make me laugh when they think brushing their teeth gets rid of the smell. 🙄 It literally seeps out of their skin. It really is revolting.

It does!

It's crazy, his sweat smells smoky. It's just bizarre.

OP posts:
QueenBee1234 · 29/03/2023 13:24

Ask him to try vaping instead.
I stopped smoking cigarettes (purely for vanities sake, I didn't want to smell!!) but I am surgically attached to my vape unfortunately.
May be better for you if he can still get the nicotine fix without the smell.

Original poster
WhoDatWhoDere · 29/03/2023 15:57

QueenBee1234 · 29/03/2023 13:24

Ask him to try vaping instead.
I stopped smoking cigarettes (purely for vanities sake, I didn't want to smell!!) but I am surgically attached to my vape unfortunately.
May be better for you if he can still get the nicotine fix without the smell.

Hmm. This is actually a great idea, my dad used one for a while to give up and they actually smell quite nice!

OP posts:
CarPoor · 29/03/2023 16:02

I mean it is poor hygiene if he's got rotten teeth as well

Smoking, combines with rotting teeth and sugar is never an attractive smelling combination. I think you need to be honest with him, it's perfectly reasonable to not want to kiss someone with bad breath and it's something he can change. Go alongside him on a health kick is a good idea but I also think he needs to know how it makes you feel

Original poster
WhoDatWhoDere · 29/03/2023 16:18

CarPoor · 29/03/2023 16:02

I mean it is poor hygiene if he's got rotten teeth as well

Smoking, combines with rotting teeth and sugar is never an attractive smelling combination. I think you need to be honest with him, it's perfectly reasonable to not want to kiss someone with bad breath and it's something he can change. Go alongside him on a health kick is a good idea but I also think he needs to know how it makes you feel

His teeth are not due to hygiene. He had 2 sets of molars grow in at angles to each other, which caused them to crack.

He's been waiting since 2021 to get them taken out.

The rest of his teeth are perfect.

OP posts:
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