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Original poster

He went silent after arranging 2nd date

53 replies

userab · 27/03/2023 13:12

Just over a week ago I went on a first date, all went well, we got on, sat there for hours chatting and good time etc, next day he messaged saying he really enjoyed it and would like to go out again, I agreed snd we have been in contact since, not loads but you know checking in twice a week,

On Friday just gone he asked to meet on Sunday, I agreed snd we left it as we would meet Sunday evening and he offered to come over closer my way this time, I said I would look at some options and let him know.

Sunday comes round and I message over a choice of venue's between the two of us, he doesn't respond nor even reads the message, finally reads message at 7.30am this morning and hasn't responded

I really want to say something but don't want to come across like I'm annoyed but then the other part of me just wants to totally ignore it

What would you do, I'm guessing he blow the idea out now and obviously wasn't a good reason for not responding yesterday as surely if he did have a good reason he would of rushed to tell me

OP posts:
Nolosomi · 27/03/2023 13:14

I’d block him & move on - or just call the fucker out.

TooMinty · 27/03/2023 13:16

I'd do nothing, don't message him. The ball is in his court and if he does contact you then be wary about him keeping you hanging on.

MaireadMcSweeney · 27/03/2023 13:18

Literally just ignore him forever. Block and delete his number if you think you need help to ignore him.

Thisisworsethananticpated · 27/03/2023 13:21

Just ignore , delete and forget
IF he resurfaces

read and then delete again

it’s not worth the emotional energy to call him out
literally delete and forget
don’t even block him as that’s a message in itself

ArcticBells · 27/03/2023 13:27

Sorry OP but I suspect he's been out with someone else since he saw you.

MaireadMcSweeney · 27/03/2023 13:30

ArcticBells · 27/03/2023 13:27

Sorry OP but I suspect he's been out with someone else since he saw you.

He might, or he might just not be feeling it. It doesn't matter anyway.

Toebeans1 · 27/03/2023 13:34

What a tosser. This happened to me back when I was dating and turned out he’d gotten back with his ex between our dates.

Delete his number and move on OP you deserve better x

Dery · 27/03/2023 13:39

Just ignore him and move on. It’s disappointing but it seems to happen a lot. Remember silence is a form of communication in itself. Don’t call him out. It’s not worth it. As PP said, if he comes back in a while, you can tell him he’s missed his chance.

Greenfairydust · 27/03/2023 13:43

Delete, block and move on.

He is a time waster and at least you are able to screen him out early and move on to better things.

happysingleversary · 27/03/2023 13:50

If you let me I can cut out 100% of the hassle and confusion in your dating life?

Just know these two things:

No response is a response

If you are unsure, he's not interested.

gamerchick · 27/03/2023 13:58

Just bin. It's not worth the shit. Don't be an option to some bloke.

Peckhaminn · 27/03/2023 13:59

Waste of space. Clearly not that interested

Thisisworsethananticpated · 27/03/2023 14:28

I wouldn’t even block
as that shows you give a shit

far more satisfying and empowering to delete

Lastlongers · 27/03/2023 15:35

MaireadMcSweeney · 27/03/2023 13:18

Literally just ignore him forever. Block and delete his number if you think you need help to ignore him.

How SAD is your message just block him. I believe this is the reason why MEN are running away from dating, little trip women gone.

He might have an excuse could or don't want to tell someone new. Why cant we just be civil and ask him politely ask him Like saying,

(I take you were busy on Sunday, if you want to meet up again, would you arrange? If you let me know, I will let you know if I can if not I will let you know alternative days we can meet up, of course that if you are interested.)

Lastlongers · 27/03/2023 15:37

Greenfairydust · 27/03/2023 13:43

Delete, block and move on.

He is a time waster and at least you are able to screen him out early and move on to better things.

Why just simply delete and move on? why not be polite ask him?

SugarMelonWater · 27/03/2023 15:57

You should have sent him venues on Saturday, it's too last minute notice to be told the morning of the second date where you're going. I'd be offended by this. I think he jumped the gun and assumed you're not contacting him so he went out with someone else and was too annoyed that he ignored you.
Either politely ask what happened and if he's ok or block him but do not send any angry or bitter closure 'have a nice life' sort of texts.

JenniferBooth · 27/03/2023 15:59

Whatever happened to manners and courtesy

PennyForearm · 27/03/2023 16:03

If someone I was going on a date with said they’d firm up plans later, and they left it until the day of the date - maybe even just hours before we were supposed to meet, I’d bin them off.

I think that may be what has happened.

Thisisworsethananticpated · 27/03/2023 16:03

This threads so funny

he was discourteous
he deserves nothing

we are all on our phones all day….
takes nothing to say ‘really really sorry - somethings come up can we postpone ‘

if you like someone that’s what you do.

hes not even jn a coma as he managed to read her message !?

MistyFrequencies · 27/03/2023 16:06

Lastlongers · 27/03/2023 15:37

Why just simply delete and move on? why not be polite ask him?

Show quote history

She doesnt need to "be polite and ask him" when he has shown her none of that courtesy. She needs to realise he is not interested and move on.

Oopsiedaisyy · 27/03/2023 16:11

I'd have said one or two messages over the course of a week indicated a lack of interest on his part and yours. If he was keen he'd have been pushing you for your availability

ISpyCobraKai · 27/03/2023 16:12

Do nothing, move on and don't get obsessed.

Spottycarousel · 27/03/2023 16:27

Unfortunately it sounds like he met someone else and decided against your second date. It's horrible but I guess it happens a lot in the early stages when people keep their options open. Personally I wouldn't chase him - if he wants to see you he will be in touch, no question. If something innocent had cropped up he would have apologised by now. I would move on.

Willowtre1 · 27/03/2023 16:30

I'd say do nothing. If he gets in touch and it turns out he was dealing with a completely unforseen emergency situation, fine. That is extremely unlikely. So it is probably wise to mentally move on and don't waste any energy on him. Silence is such a wimpy move if he's changed his mind

SallyWD · 27/03/2023 16:32

It's very rude of him. I imagine he's seeing other women and found someone he prefers. Just ignore him and move on. Lucky escape!