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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

He went silent after arranging 2nd date

53 replies

userab · 27/03/2023 13:12

Just over a week ago I went on a first date, all went well, we got on, sat there for hours chatting and good time etc, next day he messaged saying he really enjoyed it and would like to go out again, I agreed snd we have been in contact since, not loads but you know checking in twice a week,

On Friday just gone he asked to meet on Sunday, I agreed snd we left it as we would meet Sunday evening and he offered to come over closer my way this time, I said I would look at some options and let him know.

Sunday comes round and I message over a choice of venue's between the two of us, he doesn't respond nor even reads the message, finally reads message at 7.30am this morning and hasn't responded

I really want to say something but don't want to come across like I'm annoyed but then the other part of me just wants to totally ignore it

What would you do, I'm guessing he blow the idea out now and obviously wasn't a good reason for not responding yesterday as surely if he did have a good reason he would of rushed to tell me

OP posts:
Gravelady · 29/03/2023 09:20

cassiatwenty · 28/03/2023 14:51

What a trooper! He loves his tennis all right 😷

I know right and quite an elaborate lie isn’t it! So glad to be happily married now

Lastlongers · 29/03/2023 11:27

IsaiditwasLighthearted · 28/03/2023 16:27

@Lastlongers @JenniferBooth have you been online dating recently? It's fucking brutal. Nobody but nobody would ask "why didn't you want to meet up"

OP I do think you left it too late to only be messaging to suggest places on the Sunday, the day of the date. I would feel like I was a last minute option if someone did that to me.

I agree, online dating is brutal and SOUL destroying. A friend of mine he was good catch to a mortgage free house, Excellent career, and hew was very HANDY man (Unlike me, I cannot even put a shelf up LoL).

His wife cheated on him and a year later he pulled himself together with mine and other friends help. He says he registered I think two or three dating web sites Match.com and eHarmony I think other I don't know of.

He become more depressed day in day out he wasn't hearing anything he send messages to women.

He thought he was going to be single forever at 48. Luckily a lady friend of mine had a friend, I and her managed to set up blind date, I think they are still together. Haven't seen them a while now.

As it happens, when he was single I always saw him and went out for drink, since I haven't heard from him, nor I've got in touch either, because of daily chores, and weekend with family etc.

(YEP I admit, Us MEN are useless organising piss up in brewery with our male friends unless ladies organises 😂)

LoraPiano · 29/03/2023 18:10

Online dating has become a game of who plays is cooler. First OP played it cool by being noncommittal and letting him know only a few hours before. He then played it even cooler by not replaying to her until later.

@userab you are not interested in him clearly. He is not that into you either, so I would just leave it. Next time if you want to go on a date, let them organize it or don't say "will let you know"

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