Without sounding sad at 46 am I likely to be able to meet anyone?

[Wonderingwhyy]

just that really.

My ex had an affair and left 3 years ago. What with covid and 2 DC ( one who has SEN so tricky) it’s only now I’m at the point of thinking I’d really like to try meeting someone. But I’m 46 .

This probably sounds a silly question but is this even possible? Do people my age go on OLD? Im assuming the majority of men would be looking for someone younger. Is there a site that
would be better to join?

Apologies for the probably stupid question - never really had to think about it before and my friends are either married or not interested in another relationship of single or a bit younger than me.

I’ve just counted on my fingers, OP, and it turns out I’ve been with my current partner for five years, which means we met when I was - ta dah! - 46.

Men live shorter lives than women on average, and often get frail in their 60s. I am 46, fit, healthy and active, and I don't find older men attractive, neither do I want to sign up to being their personal nurse.

I like men my age and a bit younger, and in my opinion dating younger men makes much more sense from the point of view of energy, fitness and life expectancy for women over 40. And believe me, I am not short of candidates.

Also, some men after 50 get really grumpy really quickly. I have no intention to putting up with that, I am a happy and positive person and only want a man if he can improve what I have. otherwise I will continue happily single as I am right now.

Love this!

(added: that's even before considering all the issues they have with getting and keeping their penises up after 50... no thanks)

😂 Maybe I just got lucky! I'm having an absolute blast with my older man, amazing sex life, travelling the world together, enjoying life very, very much with him. He is one in a million though!

These posts are really making me smile 😀.

Id love to meet someone who is up for new things, but also - prob makes me sound very dull! - but intelligent with a bit of a hinterland. Haven’t had that in a long long time!

And great sex of course 😁

You say your interests are quite female - but DH and I share a passion for theatre - we go all the time, he loves it as much as I do. It's one of the main things that drew us together. In fact we first met in a theatre foyer! Men love theatre too.

And I recently went to a dance class that was - funnily enough - full of men in their forties and fifties. I was very surprised. expected it to be only women. One of them showed me where the class was and he was so friendly and started up an interesting conversation as we walked through the maze of corridors to get there. They were really twinkly eyed and there was a lot of wholesome, very light hearted flirting going on (I'm happily married so it was just part of the dance but if I'd been single I might have flirted more.)

The third person I dated after being widowed I met on OLD. I was 45, he was 54. Best relationship I've ever had.

@WinterFoxes - I would love to meet someone who had a passion for theatre and dance. Tbf my ex was always open to trying new things and did go to the theatre - but he didn’t love it in quite the way I do ( which when you really love it you know right!). I think men who love theatre are quite elusive to find!

I suppose I’m reflecting that I feel like now I would like a relationship with someone different to my previous type. Which maybe isn’t a bad thing.

I was more meaning any Meetup type groups I’ve joined have been mainly largely female ( not complaining as obviously I am female!).

@Wonderingwhyy Have the done classes and theatre and meet up groups helped at all to expand your social circle and meet someone a year on?

I met my husband in the old fashioned way: having lunch at friend’s houses having received an invitation that morning. We fb chatted for 3.5 months before meeting again for a trip to the theatre in London, dinner and a hotel room …

He confessed he loved me after our first date, but was in a crying, distraught state on the blower because it was all too much: I was the first woman he’d had feelings for since his wife’s death four years earlier. We talked it through and it’s the only time I’ve been upset with him, as I could see ann amazing future with him evaporating

Thankfully, we resolved the impasse (him suggesting that we shouldn’t continue being romantic friends - we most definitely were and are!), and both stopped crying. Six years on we’ve been married for five and one sixth years and are both blissfully happy. We still don’t have you a dog, Ernie

We are the same age (him being exactly three months younger than me): we were significantly older than you when we met.

Best of luck 💐

I think it's quite hard to be honest. I have a group of friends in our 50s who have been single for many many years. I have met men OLD but they are really interested in having sex on weekends and someone to share a bank holiday with when they aren't living their bachelor life style after a long marriage. If that's what you're after then you'll be fine. There seem to be lots of lovely women who look after themselves and are interesting and attractive and not the equivalent in men.

Just had a few notifications that this thread had sprung back into life!

@occhiazzurri - unfortunately I ended up having quite a major operation which took me out of action for some months. I haven’t met anyone yet, but have definitely had fun and met some great people at meet up groups etc. Nothing romantic though! Tried speed dating a few times but have now concluded think it’s doubtful I’d meet someone that way, so about to try dating apps a bit more seriously.

Did get asked out by a lovely guy I met in a totally different context, but I didn’t really fancy him. I guess that shows it is possible though!

I suspect it’s fairly unlikely I will meet someone as at this point I’m not sure I’m invested enough to put in the time needed. But think I’m ok with that. I am considering trying to have a few meaningless flings though 😄