New relationship timeline

[CrunchyKnot]

What is considered a ‘normal’ timeline with a new relationship?

I know it is dependent on how everything feels but how long before, for example, introducing kids wouldn’t raise an eyebrow?

[CrunchyKnot]

And where does it slot in? Should you introduce to friends first? Should you have DTD already … etc

[nc1013]

You'll get a lot of people on MN saying you should wait at least a year to introduce kids.
In my current relationship I waited 7/8 months. I've had previous relationships the same length where I wouldn't even considered it but this feels different.

Also Dd is such a massive part of my life that if her and my bf didn't get along, I would rather no sooner rather than later.

I absolutely wouldn't consider dc meeting a partner before I'd slept with him. Unless of course you're waiting for marriage or something

[Zanatdy]

I’ve been with my bf around 2.5 months. Not introduced him to anyone yet but we don’t get a huge amount of time together as he has custody of his kids (mine are older teens). A few of my work friends know him already via work. Quite a few people know I’m seeing him now but I haven’t told my kids. Thinking about it maybe end of February or March sometime. His kids will be much longer as they have their mum coming back into their life and that should take priority. It will be easier for us to spend time together when they know. But it’s just not suitable for another 3 months minimum I’d say. But it will vary. We are quite serious already and both want it to last, but the best will in the world, we don’t really know each other that much after 3 months. So no kid introductions. For both sets of kids it’s the first relationship post separation with their parent. But I was single 10yrs, him 5, so that helps with the kids

[Pseudonamed]

We introduced the kids at 6 months and then after that we introduced others like family and friends. It was the kids that were most important.

[XmasElf10]

I met boyf for the first time just before Xmas. We have met up once a week since and have DTD. We are going for a first weekend away next weekend. I mentioned to my sister and my DD12 that I had a date but have no intention of doing introductions any time soon. Absolute minimum of 6 month before a kid intro, maybe more like a year.

[CrunchyKnot]

I was thinking 6 months. But likely to meet friends before that as lots of social events coming up that I would like him to join me for

[Chuffaluffa]

I think people have very divided opinions on this. I’m happy for my kids to meet who I date- they’re all over 10 so not too young to understand, I value their perspectives and it’s really important to me to see how a partner reacts/engages with them. I also think most of our kids will not marry once, so i think it’s really helpful to model the healthy ending of a relationship so they know how to treat people properly and with respect.

[SpinningFloppa]

I think 6 months is about right. Personally wouldn’t do the early introduction “friends” thing but that’s because my kids are older and I don’t really have any male friends so they would know I was lying 🤣… I was reading about someone who let a man she met old come to her house for a first date when her child was in bed, now stuff like that I do judge I don’t care, I think that’s really bad.

[CrunchyKnot]

That’s an interesting perspective Chuff. My children are 12 and 14.

[Chuffaluffa]

It depends how open you are with your kids, and only you will know how they might respond, but I think most kids just want their parents to be happy. Also, my kids have met several people I’ve dated and will highlight red flags for me early doors- for example, one of my teenagers didn’t like the way a guy disciplined his dog- it quickly became clear he was a dick- they have much better bullshit detectors than me 😂

[Oopsiedaisyy]

Dtd 3rd date, met kids initially at 4ish months, not regularly since, but met his kids earlier than that.

[CrunchyKnot]

They know I’m dating as they are with me full time and I didn’t want to lie about where I was going. It’s been 2 months. We haven’t dtd yet.

[Pseudonamed]

If you have not even slept together yet I would be planning nothing. Make sure you are sexually compatible before even telling people about him just in case. He could have a tiny penis!