Bloke I met through work quite a while ago (but not a direct colleague).
We had a one night fling which we should have left at that, however I quite fancied him so I was glad when he said that he wanted to see me again.
We met up a week later for more of the same, arranged on the day itself at short notice. He was clear he wasn't looking for anything serious and I didn't think I was either but I felt like whatever it was could be fun.
Then silence for a month. Quick shag.
Three weeks then passed since we last spent the night together and I realised that I actually felt a bit down in the dumps, not invigorated or whatever else you're supposed to feel after no strings sex. I felt a bit used and disposable which I know is probably silly.. he made his intentions clear right?
So he got in contact with me today, with sex in mind, and as tempting as it is to see him again I just don't think I can be in an arrangement like this. A quick shag then radio silence for weeks/months. It doesn't make me feel good about myself.
I like the idea of something a bit more intimate. No commitment still, both free to see other people, just not so clinical and i dare say... cold? Maybe one or two texts over the course of the week, asking how my weekend has been or whatever. Maybe sharing a bottle of wine and taking that to bed. Who knows.. heaven forbid maybe.the odd takeaway?!
I made light of the 'ghosting' (if you can even call it that?) when he text me today and he said he wasn't trying to tie me down he just wanted to fuck me again.. Whatever happened to chivalry, atleast buy me a drink first 😂
Could you help me compile a pleasant message to him explaining that I don't want to see him in that way again as whilst I'm not looking for a serious relationship right now I think we are on completely different pages with what we want/expect from somebody we're sleeping with.
He wants a bootycall he can pick up at his convenience, I prefer any arrangements I have to feel mutually beneficial and I dare say a bit more respectful. I've had several before and they worked wonderfully. Those men were friends along with the benefits part.
I want to make it clear that I do not want a relationship with him, because I don't, and that's the last thing I want him to take away from it. That'll just make any future interactions awkward and make me look like a twat who got the feels.
I want to cull it and end on a positive note so that when our paths do cross, which they will, there's no awkwardness or weird feeling.
Just a line drawn under it and that's that.