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Relationships

Revenge....would you?

85 replies

cleanbreak2022 · 25/01/2023 22:44

I saw a segment on morning tv last week about revenge and whether you would exact revenge if you could.

It got me thinking, there's so many people on the forum that have suffered a great wrong, innocently going about their lives and BAM and huge deceitful betrayal is thrown at them.

So if you could, would you take revenge? I'm not suggesting violence or any such. As an example, if your ex spouse had an affair and their beloved collectible car was thrown in the matrimonial pot, would you ask for it so you could sell/scrap it? If money was your ex partners motivation, would you 'take them for all their worth'? If they had called you names like 'fat' or 'ugly' would you go all revenge body? If you had the opportunity to take all their money or a precious possession, would you?

I'm not a journo! I have many posts I'm just curious, if the opportunity arose, would you take it?

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winterbegone · 25/01/2023 22:50

No far too much hassle, I live my best life without people that have done me wrong

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cleanbreak2022 · 25/01/2023 22:54

@winterbegone I like that. I know, if I'm honest I've certainly day dreamed about it. How I would love his car to be stolen. Im not sure if I would ever act out revenge but I know I've certainly fantasised about it! I wonder whether that makes me bitter

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winterbegone · 25/01/2023 22:57

Love a revenge fantasy lol, I wouldn't be that compassionate if my ex ever split up with his new gf!

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supercali77 · 25/01/2023 22:59

I fantasised about it with one man but he was dangerous and unpredictable. An old friend of a friend unpicked the bum seams in all her stbxh's trousers so that they'd eventually 'pop' one day as he went about his business.

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Princesspollyyy · 25/01/2023 23:03

I've done it before and it didn't make me feel much better.

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cleanbreak2022 · 25/01/2023 23:04

@supercali77 genius move! I was just thinking following on from the 'loathing the Ow' post. If I saw both their cars in a car park, would I key them? I know I would be tempted but I'd like to think I wouldn't. I guess the 'woman scorned' saying must come from somewhere!

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postitpatty · 25/01/2023 23:05

God who can be arsed. The best revenge is to move on and have a better life then just smile and wave!

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cleanbreak2022 · 25/01/2023 23:06

@Princesspollyyy I suppose that's experience for you. I'd love to think I'd be all smug and smiles laughing to myself. The caveat to revenge I suppose that you place yourself on a level that you're not comfortable with so it doesn't feel quite as good as the fantasy

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blueshoes · 25/01/2023 23:06

I'd would not want to do something positive as revenge but I would definitely do something negative as revenge, such as I would not piss on him if he were on fire.

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blueskylie · 25/01/2023 23:06

I had a boyfriend that cheated on me. We were living together at the time, so a serious relationship, but not as devastating as if a husband/father of my children did it, if you see what I mean.

He was cheating with a woman at work. I found out and kicked him out. Quite soon after, there was a message for him left on our house answerphone from his work telling him and his new girlfriend they were fired and not to come in the next day. I didn't pass the message on. I loved thinking about the awkwardness when they both turned up for work and were told to go home.

Not exactly going out of my way for revenge, but more passively accepting it.

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cleanbreak2022 · 25/01/2023 23:09

@blueskylie definitely! Come to think of it, my ex left me to do all our home admin. When he left I stopped (obviously) he didn't change any of his details to his new address and I kept getting reminders through the door about his Road tax having expired. I forgot to pass the message on. I did laugh when it got clamped!

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Zipps · 25/01/2023 23:14

No I wouldn't, revenge is just bitterness.
I'd be thankful that I'd got rid of the problem and get on with my awesome life.
I do think karma sorts things out anyway for most people. I know a few nasty bastards/ cheats/Ow that ended up lonely/in the shit/ seriously unhappy etc

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LadyWithLapdog · 25/01/2023 23:16

The older I get, the less I remember past slights. If I won the Lottery, I don’t even have a list of people to go to and say “take that, morher**er”.

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PrtScn · 25/01/2023 23:37

I probably would if opportunity presented itself. I wouldn’t go out of my way to, especially if it required any time, effort or money, but otherwise yeah.

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pizzaoven · 25/01/2023 23:39

In my worst moments, I used to daydream about his employers finding out about his immoral behaviour! However, it was never going to be me who exposed him as that would require him taking up too much rent space in my head.

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WandaWonder · 25/01/2023 23:45

That would show I cared, if I was the innocent one I would not be the one with the problem

So the best revenge for me would be to move on with my life

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BillyNighysWife · 25/01/2023 23:48

The best revenge is living well.

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arcencielpoisson · 25/01/2023 23:48

I genuinely couldn't be arsed.

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Pyewhacket · 25/01/2023 23:55

I think you’d have to be very careful what you did. Some people would take it personally if you did them real damage or cost them money and reputation. I read about a woman who sprayed her cheating boyfriends car with a rattle can but that proved to be criminal damage and she had to pay £3000 to have it resprayed.

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caringcarer · 26/01/2023 00:03

When my h of 21 years cheated on me and broke my heart I used to have dreams of really terrible things happening to him. I can remember in one he drowned and in another he had a bad car crash. I don't know if I dreamed that for a reason, as I've heard dreams are often your true wishes. About a month later he did have a car crash and broke his right arm, collar bone, shoulder and 2 ribs. I felt guilty as if I had somehow made it happen, even though I knew rationally I had not been involved.

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NameChange005 · 26/01/2023 00:06

As a younger person, I would have and I did do petty revenge once. It didn't make me feel any better. (nothing extreme/illegal, just stupid things that would really annoy them like unpairing all their socks and stirring them in the drawer so they had to spend time sorting them out again)
Moving on with head high is better IMO

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Haruka · 26/01/2023 04:55

Direct revenge, no. That never ends up well and I'm a two wrongs don't make a right person.

However, I'd love to be able to tell everyone the truth about how my ex husband treated me, including my ex in-laws and every single mutual friend we had. Make them see what an arse he is and have him face actual consequences. But I'd shoot myself in the foot by having him make my life hell with childcare and using the children as pawns, which he is currently refraining from doing.

So all I can hope is that he will trip himself up eventually and someone with less to lose than me will do it for me.

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lifeinthehills · 26/01/2023 05:43

Whoever I might want to get revenge on isn't worth the energy investment. I also doubt I'd waste energy caring if I heard certain people in my past had suffered misfortune. Indifference is quite liberating.

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StrictlyAFemaleFemale · 26/01/2023 05:47

I wouldn't go as far as revenge but I do enjoy a bit of Schadenfreude when someone has behaved badly.

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LHReturns · 26/01/2023 05:47

There is something not very cool about ‘a woman scorned’…

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