Accused of Gaslighting

[Pleashelp20233]

Last night going to bed after closing my eyes my girlfriend said she wanted to show me a photo on her phone. I said I was too tired and I just wanted to sleep and would look at it in the morning. She got out of bed and said I had really offended and hurt her by not looking at the photo as she told me she was going to look for it to show me (I missed her saying this as I was tired). She then raised her voice which I asked her to lower, left the room and came back and asked was I going to apologise, I asked did she not think she was overreacting to which she replied that I was gaslighting her and invalidating her feelings by saying that. Is that gaslighting?

I'm confused...what part did you miss her saying due to being tired?

It actually sounds like the most childish argument ever.

1. it doesn't take much energy for you to open your eyes and look at a photo; but also,
2. someone asking to see a photo in the morning instead shouldn't be a big deal either.

Was it a special photo or related to an emotional subject?

I missed her saying she was going to look on her phone for a funny picture to show me. Then when she went to show me, my contacts were out and I had already closed my eyes and was trying to go to sleep. It was a photo of her cat.

If this a frequent situation and you end up arguing over stupid things a lot then something is obviously wrong in your relationship.

Definitely not something I could be arsed with , on either side.

She sounds like a bit of a nightmare.

No not gaslighting. That's a psychological abuse.

The two of you sound odd and petty though, for the reasons @nc1013 lists. Just out of curiosity, did you keep your eyes closed through this entire exchange?

Gaslighting seems to be banded about a lot these days by little girls that aren't getting their own way. I would be re-evaluating if this is what you want to deal with for the rest of your life.

You were tired and didn’t want to look at a photo she found funny. She was OTT and childish. So no I don’t think you should have apologised

I don't remember her saying it so I'm not sure

I don't remember her saying it so I'm not sure

You are perfectly entitled to go to sleep. It could have waited till the morning. Your not gaslighting her. Best you can do is explain this and move on. Whether she will is up to her.

Sorry I'm not very good at replying to messages and quoted the wrong message earlier. I'm not sure whether my eyes were closed when she said she had a picture to show me as ii can't remember her saying it as I was already in bed. By the time she went to show me it my eyes had been closed a few minutes. Maybe I should have looked at the photo but i was wrecked from working all week and including yesterday. I agree its a really stupid argument.