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Original poster

Would you be suspicious of this text

66 replies

Supercalafragalisti · 27/12/2022 13:26

Me and my other half live at a distance, and have a very fulfilling relationship with constant contact and lots of love both sides. We did have some bad times and seem to have overcome them. So at the moment things are amazing and settled between us. Anyway this morning he sent me this picture message that had a loving sweet sentiment on it “being away from your lover is painful, but would rather that than ever love anyone else”

The problem is, it was forwarded. I honestly can’t think of any logical rational explanation for this apart from that another woman sent it to him. I’ve certainly not ever sent it to him and him resending it. It was on WhatsApp. My heads a bit all over the place. I have responded saying, that’s such a sweet and true message, but it was forwarded, so can I ask who sent it to you?

now I’m thinking if there’s another explanation I just look suspicious and mean.

so please tell me if there is or if you’d be wondering the same.

OP posts:
Hungrycaterpillarsmummy · 27/12/2022 13:27

Hmm i think it is a bit strange it was forwarded yes but maybe there is an innocent explanation

Hungrycaterpillarsmummy · 27/12/2022 13:28

I think you need to see what your partner says

feelingsimilar · 27/12/2022 13:28

Sometimes if I see memes on facebook and send them to friends on Whatsapp it shows as forwarded.

feelingsimilar · 27/12/2022 13:29

For it not to show as 'forwarded' I have to download it as a picture

Original poster
Supercalafragalisti · 27/12/2022 13:31

This is the kind of explanation I was hoping for, thank you. I’ll see what he says

OP posts:
YouTarzan · 27/12/2022 13:31

the guy I’m seeing wouldn’t send this kind of message, but if he did and it showed as forwarded, I wouldn’t assume another woman had sent it to him.

shuttheblindsintheevening · 27/12/2022 13:34

Is he in any WhatsApp groups? I'm in quite a few and people do sometimes forward all sorts of strange things. If there was someone else (somewhat unlikely from what you've said, it would be extraordinarily cruel to forward it from them to you.

Ilovelurchers · 27/12/2022 13:35

I think memes do show as forwarded if you see one on Facebook or whatever and decide to send it to someone.

Have you any other reason to suspect him?

astronewt · 27/12/2022 13:36

What kind of moron would forward a romantic meme from his bit on the side to his partner? He'd have to be beyond stupid. Is he?

By far the most likely explanation is that he saw it somewhere and it made him think of you. Why would you jump to thinking he got it from another woman?

Original poster
Supercalafragalisti · 27/12/2022 13:36

I did just try to do that myself by sending a text to my daughter, but it just came up as a Facebook link, didn’t say forwarded or display the picture unless you click on the link

OP posts:
BabyFour2023 · 27/12/2022 13:37

feelingsimilar · 27/12/2022 13:28

Sometimes if I see memes on facebook and send them to friends on Whatsapp it shows as forwarded.

This.

Original poster
Supercalafragalisti · 27/12/2022 13:37

Who would you assume sent it to him seeing as it’s intimate? He’s a blokey bloke, his friends would never sent something like that to him, it was a clear expression of longing and love.

OP posts:
Original poster
Supercalafragalisti · 27/12/2022 13:45

For people asking why I would think this or that, it was an intimate message you’d send to a lover, not to a group or a friend.

secondly yea we have had issues in the past with his boundaries with other females. He thinks it’s perfectly acceptable to reciprocate sexual desire for other females “as long as he doesn’t do anything” as a result he’s told lots of other women he fancies them in the few years we’ve been together. He swears nothing has come of that. He refuses to see it as wrong, and I have put it behind me. But I find it hard to think of it as that black and white. So seeing a message like that forwarded, I couldn’t thing of a realistic explanation for it apart from as is the case on WhatsApp, it was a message sent to him that he has “forwarded” to me.

OP posts:
DatingDinosaur · 27/12/2022 13:48

Supercalafragalisti · 27/12/2022 13:36

I did just try to do that myself by sending a text to my daughter, but it just came up as a Facebook link, didn’t say forwarded or display the picture unless you click on the link

That can depend on phone settings and device viewed/sent from so it doesn't necessarily mean anything. I'm in a photography group and if I view the forum on my phone I just see links but if I view it on my laptop I see the image rather than the link.

Same as the emojis used on here. If I look on my phone I see the emoji. If I look on my laptop I see a white square.

beenwhereyouare · 27/12/2022 13:49

This is probably completely innocent. I often send to myself first, before forwarding to others. I may be in a hurry and want to take the time to add a note or something. Or maybe it's the middle of the night and I justt want to save and send it later.

beenwhereyouare · 27/12/2022 13:50

This is probably completely innocent. I often send to myself first, before forwarding to others. I may be in a hurry and want to take the time to add a note or something. Or maybe it's the middle of the night and I justt want to save and send it later.

CambsAlways · 27/12/2022 13:50

He’s told lots of women he’s fancied them in the few years we’ve been together! He’s certainly a keeper !

Lexi868 · 27/12/2022 13:54

Supercalafragalisti · 27/12/2022 13:45

For people asking why I would think this or that, it was an intimate message you’d send to a lover, not to a group or a friend.

secondly yea we have had issues in the past with his boundaries with other females. He thinks it’s perfectly acceptable to reciprocate sexual desire for other females “as long as he doesn’t do anything” as a result he’s told lots of other women he fancies them in the few years we’ve been together. He swears nothing has come of that. He refuses to see it as wrong, and I have put it behind me. But I find it hard to think of it as that black and white. So seeing a message like that forwarded, I couldn’t thing of a realistic explanation for it apart from as is the case on WhatsApp, it was a message sent to him that he has “forwarded” to me.

That's very disrespectful to you that he actually tells other women he fancies them...

BeggyMitchell · 27/12/2022 13:57

.

Would you be suspicious of this text
LadyLaLaa · 27/12/2022 13:58

He thinks it’s perfectly acceptable to reciprocate sexual desire for other females “as long as he doesn’t do anything” as a result he’s told lots of other women he fancies them in the few years we’ve been together. He swears nothing has come of that.
Wow! Your bar is too low.

minticecreamisjustok · 27/12/2022 14:00

From your update that explains why you don't trust him. Perhaps it is from another woman past or present, you don't know for sure, however I think the real issue is why you putting up with him knowing he thinks it's ok to tell other women he fancies them while in a relationship with you. He's not taking the relationship with you very seriously. Do you not think you're worth more?

iknowwheretheothersockgoes · 27/12/2022 14:04

secondly yea we have had issues in the past with his boundaries with other females. He thinks it’s perfectly acceptable to reciprocate sexual desire for other females “as long as he doesn’t do anything” as a result he’s told lots of other women he fancies them in the few years we’ve been together.

🚩🚩🚩🚩

Original poster
Supercalafragalisti · 27/12/2022 14:10

The job he does means he’s constantly in contact with new people, and he’s a good looking and charming guy. He gets a lot of female attention. I’ve seen it with my own eyes. We have different values when it comes to how we deal with people who might try it on with us. He says to tell someone he fancies them too but then to cut the conversation and if they text again to not reply or wait a few days basically showing clear lack of interest emotionally is better than making someone feel they aren’t attractive. I say it’s stoking a fire. He says he’d never initiate anything, but that I clearly don’t trust him if I think it’s a problem. I just feel there’s things you only say to your partner. Just different way of looking at things, but unfortunately I have worked to just trust him, but this has thrown me a bit, as the only time I’ve seen “forwarded” on WhatsApp is if it was sent by someone else. I would find it hard to believe the way things are between us that anything untoward is going on. I deleted the messages I sent him, so have just not replied, he didn’t read them. The message itself is lovely and don’t just want to leave it on read. So just thought I’d ask here.

OP posts:
Emmamoo89 · 27/12/2022 14:10

You definitely deserve better x

DatingDinosaur · 27/12/2022 14:13

Just seen your update after the one I quoted.

Now, it sounds like you're one of many and he's keeping his options open. At the moment you're the front runner. Or maybe the woman who sent him that is.

That's the problem with distance relationships - it's too easy to lead a double life.