My sister contacted me in August this year to tell me her fiance was going to court the following week to see if he was guilty of accessing child pornography, I immediately told her to go to our parents house for a family meeting and told her she could not continue her relationship if this was true, I would never accept such behaviour, I have children & work with abuse of children, so there is NO comprises for me on this.
I later received messages saying if he goes to prison she will leave him, if he gets community then she will work it out, she doesn't want to loose her Family Or him, but waiting for the judgement.
Because of my children and job, she had been advised to tell me by the police, the police also needed to contact me to discuss.....this is where it goes sideways.....
The police confirmed her fiance was arrested about a year ago, was already convinced of child sex offences, had signed the SOR and was banned from any public place where children could be...... sister withheld ALL these details.
I told my parents this information, yet in the few days that passed Inbetween family meeting and call with police, the sister had minimised the whole thing to parents and convinced them he had been 'set up' they didn't believe me and treated me like a liar
I warned parents about supporting this nonsense and if this becomes public knowledge in community, they will likely suffer consequences of association - he was sentenced to three months right after this....... obviously as he WAS already guilty, a risk to children and she already knew ALL of this, took me on a merry go round to try play victim somehow.....
Sister has been at parents since he was put iñ prison, manipulating them further, I've tried to take my daughter to see my mum but sister is always there and the only time I took her, my stepdad (sisters real dad) ignored my daughter and both parents moody with me......I asked if sister was still there a few weeks back, dad sent message about how they are setting her a flat up ect, I criticized them ' I hope your not setting her flat up for a pedophile to move into when he's released ' as this is exactly what appears they are doing....stepdad blocked me
I called mum few days later as dad had unblocked to message n say mum had been in hospital, I checked how she was and said at end of call, 'dont you go anywhere I've had to lose enough people recently ' indicating to having to distance myself from my sister due to her decisions and minimising behaviour, my mum said to me 'you will loose me too if you carry on what your saying' I snapped and hung up, I was furious my mum threatened me with abandonment (she used this as a weapon in my childhood)
I am just flabbergasted at the fact I've now lost my sister AND parents for standing on moral ground and attempting to remove and protect them all from the damage that could.come with such an association, because I can't even really discuss this with anyone (had to disclose to my employer, was not easy!) It's making me loose my mind, I think FAR too much & keep getting quite angry, I'm also pregnant and they are my only family so it's a touch break to have to make.
I KNOW hand on heart I'm standing by what is RIGHT and thinking of all the victims of the crimes he watched, but to be made out to be the bad one for voicing what is right is really tough, views and honesty from neutral people may help to bring me some peace of mind, this is extremely unusual and even with all my own professional knowledge, it's hard to accept I've basically lost my family because I won't support a pedophile, what would you have done? Xx