How do you bring up someone's hygiene

[HMum19]

So, I need help broaching something with my boyfriend.
How do I politely ask him to shower/ wash himself before he have "intimate" time? I've never noticed an issue with his hygiene before, he isn't necessarily smelly or anything or that matter, but I have been having issues down below on and off and I am worried he is causing them, I know he doesn't always shower after we have sex and has admitted to going a day or day without showering after he have sex... And then will have sex with me again!
I have just finished a course of antibiotics after getting a urine infection and I just don't want to take any risks anymore. It always infuriates me that as a woman I'm always freshly clean and presented for him, for him to not make the effort to even shower for me! I can tell when it's freshly washed and when its not...
Such an awkward thing to even discuss because I love him to bits, but I can't risk another infection down below!!! How do I bring this up to him

I don't think this can be polite tbh. I would be saying you need to shower. Etc etc. He clearly isn't making any effort so tbh I wouldn't be walking on eggshells around it. That would put me off horrendously though I have to be honest 😬

Not awkward at all. Just "Get a shower, you dirty bastard" is simple enough.

Tell him!! UTIs are commonly linked to sexual intercourse, and a nasty urine infection can backtrack up to your kidneys and make you really ill. He has to wash himself before any sexual contact. Bite the bullet, be honest, tell him his genital hygiene has to improve or sex is off the menu.

If he has so little respect for you, and seemingly no self-respect, is this even a conversation worth having? He knows he's dirty, he just doesn't care. I'd be moving on because men like him never change.

Just tell me you have had a UTI and he must shower before sex.No discussion is needed just tell him.

Ugh, what is with the grim threads this afternoon

Why do you even want to have sex with a man who has to be told to wash?!? Would totally put me off.

Tell him no shower and a good wash of his tackle then no sex. You're intimate enough to share bodily fluids but not an honest conversation?

Honesty, does this not give you the absolute ick?

I wouldn’t be having any discussion apart from it’s over you dirty minger 🤢

I haven't got anything to add on the boyfriend front, but just wanted to say you should wee after having sex to help avoid UTIs, if you aren't already.
I used to get them all the time till I found this out.

My autistic partner was like this when we met. He simply doesn't see the need to shower every day. I had to sit him down and explain when he didn't shower he was putting me at risk of serious infection and it was also a massive turn off. He got the point and now makes much more of an effort. He just didn't realise. I'm not saying it's the same for your DP but you do need to spell out the health risks. If he didn't step up then that would be a deal breaker for me.

I wouldn't be having sex with someone who hadn't washed. Grim. Time to bite the bullet and say something

Honesty is the best policy, nothing worse than a cheesy knob! Also shows the base level of respect he has for not ensuring the crown jewels are in tip top condition. I'm circumcised but most men will tell that after a day or so you smell and can start to get a bit sore as well. It might hurt his daft pride for 5 minutes but just tell him straight out!

Thanks for all your comments!
I did explain the hygiene thing after me getting this urine infection, I said we both need to be washing before and after sex (I always did anyway, but this was my polite way of getting him to do it as well)
He came round to mine last night and when we were going to have sex I could tell he hadn't washed... I made an excuse to not have sex but I didn't have the balls (pardon the pun) to bring it up then. It really annoyed me when he knows I've been fighting this infection for two weeks!!

As one of the comments above said, I think it's an ignorance thing and he genuinely doesn't think he needs to wash everyday? I just need to bite the bullet and call him out

Can you say your doctor has told you it's essential he washes before sex with you because of the UTIs?

Is it definitely a UTI op? Recurring seemingly UTIs can be an STI.

This!!!!

Just dump him. How can you even bear to look at the stinking pig? If he is this disgusting and disrespectful in such a basic, obvious area there will be much, much more of this to come if you let him.

Also, he was going out with his mates today for the footy, and last night he said "I need to get home early tomorrow so I can have a shower and head out" the cheek!!! Can shower for them but not me 😂
do I bring it up the next time he initiates sex or bring it up before?

Not really sure why you are in a relationship with someone who doesn't wash?

Grim 😐

May i ask, how did meet this gent?

do I bring it up the next time he initiates sex or bring it up before?

FFS OP just tell him! Stop fannying around with were and when. Send him a message if you must.....Hi DP, due to my recurrent UTI's it's even more important that we both keep our bits clean. Unfortunately unless you're freshly washed I won't be able to have sex with you anymore.
Job done.

I would say the doctor said if you find it embarrassing.

Just tell him by text that showering before he sees you is non negotiable after your UTI

This is absolutely grim, there’s really no excuse for poor hygiene and I wouldn’t be having sex with him until he changed his ways.