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Original poster

Looked at escorts online

73 replies

Shannon771 · 23/10/2022 20:14

Hi,
I really need some objective insight and feedback on this situation. I have a fiancé and we share
a home in England. Fiancé (age 54) came back home from visiting his grown son in Canada (where fiancé is from originally). As soon as he got back home I picked up his tablet to look something up and an escort website popped up!
It was for a higher end call girl service (in the town fiancé was visiting son, and also where fiancé visits every few months). I have never seen any of his web history prior to this and we have only been living together for one year when this happened. So I saw that he looked at 18 different profiles of escorts but I didn’t see where he had contacted anyone or anything like that. But he was clearly looking at many profiles! When I asked him about it he was mortified and he said that he had been clearing out his old emails while visiting his son and that some porn emails popped up and also the escort site just popped up and so he looked at it out of curiosity. He said it was a pop up and he only looked but I feel like looking at 18 pages of profiles is quite a bit. He said he had no idea that escorts would ever even be online which I find very hard to believe.
i just don’t know what to think. He had a previous marriage of over 20 years. Any advice?

OP posts:
firstmummy2019 · 23/10/2022 21:21

He's lying and you know it.

Original poster
Shannon771 · 23/10/2022 21:27

Most likely yes. Where there is smoke there is fire.

OP posts:
LemonDrop22 · 23/10/2022 21:32

He had a previous marriage of over 20 years.

Why did that end, do you know?

I'm guessing his ex is also Canadian and you would have zero way of having independent contact with her.

(In saying that, even if she said no cheating/prostitute use .. that doesn't mean he didn't and just didn't get caught, or that it's something he started after their relationship broke down).

LemonDrop22 · 23/10/2022 21:35

He said it was a pop up

Here's the thing; I watch porn sometimes and when pop ups, pop up, I x out of them/close them. You don't have to look at a pop up or click on a pop up. In fact I'd winder why you would unless you wanted to, at the very least, browse the profiles of the sex workers.

Onto point 2, looking through 18 profiles is not really clicking on a pop up. It's purposefully looking through sex workers profiles. It's not accidental, it's not even one quick look out of curiosity.

morninginging · 23/10/2022 21:39

You know the truth here. I'm sorry. Next you'll get the script. Do not believe it.

LemonDrop22 · 23/10/2022 21:39

Imho the least bad case scenario here is that he browses sex workers profiles, and ones for the area he visits specifically.

The worst that he uses prostitutes.

I'm not totally sure how contact is made, you would imagine by message or email, then to text.

I'm also not sure I believe the pop up story.

You may have a punter on your hands ... Well let's call him a John since he's from the US/Canada.

LemonDrop22 · 23/10/2022 21:43

He said he had no idea that escorts would ever even be online which I find very hard to believe.

There would be some form of messaging, or email address given or phone no given. You'd contact them through one of those means and they'd get back to you or someone would get back to you on their behalf asap. It might not be instant.

Previous posters who were unfortunate enough to deal with this found that their husband did not get instant replies to texts but got replies later that evening.

It just depends on availability.

LemonDrop22 · 23/10/2022 21:47

and also where fiancé visits every few months).

Look, only he knows (and will have zero reason to tell you the truth if he hasn't) but he certainly has the opportunity to cheat hours away from you/in a different country on a regular basis .... And you know he has browsed almost 20 prostitutes' profiles for that area.

Original poster
Shannon771 · 23/10/2022 21:52

He left his wife for another woman and I know His adult son sent him texts calling his dad a cheater from past behavior. But fiance says his son makes up a lot of things.

OP posts:
pinkolu · 23/10/2022 21:53

Shannon771 · 23/10/2022 21:52

He left his wife for another woman and I know His adult son sent him texts calling his dad a cheater from past behavior. But fiance says his son makes up a lot of things.

If you know he left his wife for another woman, how can he claim is son is lying by calling him a cheater??

Original poster
Shannon771 · 23/10/2022 21:56

Because he claims the marriage was long over and the that nothing had occurred with the other woman until the marriage was over. Son also called him a “serial cheater” which fiancé said was just to get him upset. They don’t have a good relationship but I don’t see why his son would make that up honestly.

OP posts:
ThatAussieGuy · 23/10/2022 22:53

Shannon771 · 23/10/2022 20:14

Hi,
I really need some objective insight and feedback on this situation. I have a fiancé and we share
a home in England. Fiancé (age 54) came back home from visiting his grown son in Canada (where fiancé is from originally). As soon as he got back home I picked up his tablet to look something up and an escort website popped up!
It was for a higher end call girl service (in the town fiancé was visiting son, and also where fiancé visits every few months). I have never seen any of his web history prior to this and we have only been living together for one year when this happened. So I saw that he looked at 18 different profiles of escorts but I didn’t see where he had contacted anyone or anything like that. But he was clearly looking at many profiles! When I asked him about it he was mortified and he said that he had been clearing out his old emails while visiting his son and that some porn emails popped up and also the escort site just popped up and so he looked at it out of curiosity. He said it was a pop up and he only looked but I feel like looking at 18 pages of profiles is quite a bit. He said he had no idea that escorts would ever even be online which I find very hard to believe.
i just don’t know what to think. He had a previous marriage of over 20 years. Any advice?

you know he's lying. The only question is, does he look when he's alone, or does he do more?

Yeah, once a cheater....

Thisisworsethananticpated · 23/10/2022 23:11

Oh dear
it’s not looking good
but more concerning is his son calling him a serial cheater
that has to be true

line your ducks up and I’m very sorry 😞

kateandme · 23/10/2022 23:16

Why does he go back there every few months?
he’s cheating sorry.
you don’t click and 18 profiles get shoved in front of your eyes.and this isn’t porn(bad enough) this is looking at escorts.totally different escalation and crossing the line even further.

LuckyLil · 23/10/2022 23:18

One or two profiles out of curiosity I could buy, but not 18. That's more than just curiosity. You know it is too.

Ofcourseshecan · 23/10/2022 23:21

You’ve only been living together a year and he’s already looking for other women. Sorry, OP. He has no concept of fidelity.

Original poster
Shannon771 · 23/10/2022 23:36

It all is very suspicious as you all have commented. He was out of the country, he looked at escorts in the area where he was staying, he looked at many many profiles, and he frequents this area every few months to visit family. I don’t see how this site would just pop up out of the blue and again even if it did why he thought it was ok to peruse the site so thoroughly. He is adamant that it’s something he would never act upon and was only looking. But even looking is very suspect (there would be no sound reason to) and says volumes about his character.

OP posts:
kateandme · 23/10/2022 23:39

Ugg to be even looking is disgusting.

ThatAussieGuy · 23/10/2022 23:40

Shannon771 · 23/10/2022 23:36

It all is very suspicious as you all have commented. He was out of the country, he looked at escorts in the area where he was staying, he looked at many many profiles, and he frequents this area every few months to visit family. I don’t see how this site would just pop up out of the blue and again even if it did why he thought it was ok to peruse the site so thoroughly. He is adamant that it’s something he would never act upon and was only looking. But even looking is very suspect (there would be no sound reason to) and says volumes about his character.

My father in law told the same story. It's BS. Things don't just 'pop up' like that

itmustbemyage · 23/10/2022 23:49

Why does he go to Canada so regularly if he doesn’t get on well with his adult son what other family does he have there? What’s more likely do you think, he is a serial cheater and doesn’t like his son calling him out on it, or that his adult son bothers to make up lies just cause?

Original poster
Shannon771 · 23/10/2022 23:53

he goes to see another son (he has two) and his sister and her kids. He gets along well with one son and not the other. The other son does admittedly have some of his own issues, but I don’t see why he would make up something like that. I just don’t.

OP posts:
kateandme · 23/10/2022 23:54

What explanation are you hoping to hear op? You no what’s going on here.

9HrsSleep · 23/10/2022 23:55

Talk about a red flag!
I guess the only question is are you going to pretend to believe him?

Original poster
Shannon771 · 24/10/2022 00:17

I really don’t want to spend years of my life wondering and not being able to trust him. What’s the point of that.

OP posts:
9HrsSleep · 24/10/2022 00:23

You can't trust him. He's lied to you. You can pretend to believe him, but he'd have to be a bloody good catch for that to be worthwhile!