Most annoying thing your DP does

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What’s your pet peeve against your DP?

Mine is that whenever he hoovers he will just leave cobwebs or that he’ll ‘do’ the kitchen and not wipe any of the surfaces and leaves everything that doesn’t belong in the kitchen in the kitchen😂

Just leave him at home

Moves my things.

In DP's mind, this is 'tidying'. As in, 'oh, your important document was sitting beside your laptop, all ready for you to pick it up in the morning ... so I tidied it away and now it's on the shelf/in a drawer/in the recycling'. 'Oh, your phone was on charge but I decided it'd look tidier if I put it on this random shelf, where we never put phones ... you're welcome!'

Makes more food than he eats.How, in your late 30s do you not know your limits?
Says Restaurawnt.
Buys lots of books by a shit author but has only.read two of.them.

He buys new stuff and doesn't get rid of whatever it's replacing. So, for example, we currently have five bike boxes when we never take more than two bikes on holiday, and he has drawerfuls of old gadgets and cables. If I ask him to list something for sale he'll say, "It's not worth anything." But he just doesn't want to make the effort. It bothers me more because one of his parents was a hoarder.

He's not going to change, and I wouldn't change him.

He's like a bull in a china shop and has no concept of how big and heavy his body and limbs are (he's not a fat man at all, but is six foot 3 and broad). Off the top of my head in the last year he's broken a bed, a sofa, countless mugs/kitchen bits, and this weeks casualty was the microwave which he broke by leaving the door open and somehow swiveling into it with his full body weight. Rip microwave.

He also eats with his mouth open which i cannot bare,

Despite the above making me want to murder him regularly he's the best man I've ever met and I love him very much 😂

Stacks dirty dishes like a game of jenga and often without scraping his leftovers into the bin first. I'd do the washing up more often if it didn't involve 10 minutes of carefully dismantling a tower of pots, pans and plates or pulling dishes out of the washing up bowl filled with cold water and floating bits of food he didn't put it in the bin. As it is, he does 95% of the dishwashing.

This!

Or stands in the middle of the room on his phone.

When I'm sat on the sofa, sometimes it feels like he stands over me and invades my space!

Blows his nose (really loud) when standing near me. Makes me feel sick!

Burps while lying on the sofa.

Eats his dinner so quickly it gives him really severe hiccups and he keeps eating through them

When it's his turn to get up with the kids, he is so slow that they are crying at the stairgate to go downstairs and I end up getting up to sort it out

When he has a sore back, he says OUCH every 30 seconds.

When he's unwell, he complains constantly and then still plays video games till 3am..

He plays video games at all.

He is absolutely god awful in bed.

He's lowering your expectations so you don't ask again....

Mine is messy. He doesn’t like throwing things away and will always do something ‘later’ which never comes

hes really hairy which is fine, but he could trim/tidy it and never does so it makes a natural unholy mess all the time, everywhere falling out

he is too respectful to ever initiate sex so will just wait patiently for me to jump on him or verbally ask him. I’ve tested this out and he really can hold out on himself. This means I don’t get jumped by him - somewhat of a good thing, sometimes is annoying!

I hear ya!

This is the funniest and most relatable thread I've read on here (well this and one years ago about the realities of pregnancy which I really wish I could find)

Mine gets it from his mum! God forbid when they're both in the same room with me. Never known claustrophobia like it

😂😂😂😂

Or in a ball in the corner!

Has to give me a fashion show and ask what to wear on a night out. Meanwhile I'm done and dusted in no time.

Has to shave his bald head to the bone before he will be seen in public.

Very hygienic and tidy, yet likes to leave receipts, leaflets and any other clothing tags or wrapper in folded piles for just in case.

Hides sweets but forgets and they go out of date.

Eats crisps and rattles the bag with his whole hand instead of two fingers like pincers.

Picks at hairs or spots on his face when driving. Can't drive straight when pressing a button on the radio.

I find all sorts of random things in random places for safe keeping? Like a screwdriver on top of the fridge? I like to have all my things especially like with like in set places.

Omg yes!! Hahah or asks me questions whilst I'm talking on the phone, trying to listen.

breathes!
Half finishes every job then goes straight on to another one.
He's got a cold at the moment but you'd think he was at deaths door. Keeps coughing over loudly and looking all tearful at me. Twat!

Three things:

Rubs his feet together while watching TV so there’s this incessant “ssscrkk-ssscrkk-ssscrkk” noise.

When we’re having to scurryfunge ahead of unexpected visitors’ imminent arrival, he’ll do some random job that adds nothing to the tidying progress (e.g. cleaning the washer and dryer filters) and has to be redirected to something useful, like hoovering.

Takes fucking ages to leave, whether that be someone else’s house after we’ve said goodbye, or the room after he’s said he’s going to bed. I end up having to drag/push him out (verbally, not physically). It drives me nuts; once I’ve said I’m leaving somewhere I just want to leave there and then, not have another 14 conversations or watch another half hour of TV.

Apart from that he’s a sweetheart, mind you.

My DH is into "chilled packing" which means he takes 10 minutes max to throw stuff into his case then spends 40 mins telling me he's travelled the world and never had a problem forgetting anything important.
Then when we're on holiday it starts. Where's my phone charger? Have you got my t shirts? Did you bring my trainers? We spend days replacing stuff he hasnt brought with him.

I love and adore my dp but he can bloody piss me off like nobody else in the world

he hangs onto everything-cos ‘it’ll come in handy’
please,somebody tell me when the box our kettle came in,will ‘come in handy’
or the random elastic band he found at our front door
ditto a random piece of paper,tube of dried out glue or old pair of boxers
(and his smug face when a bit of his crap does come in handy)

he adores Aldi-it’s his mecca
we went to Asda the other day,I could have cheerfully throttled him
he sucked air through his teeth,went pale and shouted ‘I’m not paying that’ at every single item I went near/put in the trolley

when he’s asleep,he does this weird not-snoring-not-breathing-somewhere-in-the-middle
it drives me insane-and if I kick him so he moves,I get a grumpy ‘I wasn’t snoring!’
He’s right,but it’s like driving a screwdriver through my brain

he likes to tell me his opinion on anything I wear
classics include (a pink dress with pink spots) ‘you look just like mr blobbys Nan love’
or ‘you look like a posh,lesbian riding woman’ (black trousers and a black and white top)

I adore my mil-i really do,(she’s an amazing,strong and wonderful woman-we both adore her-she’s just set in her ways,which is fine-I will be when I hit my 70’s) but if I hear just one more time ‘that’s how my mum does it’ he’ll be back living with her

im sure I wind him up-in fact I know I do-I leave my shoes scattered around the house and haven’t a clue when bin day is

Mines does majority of the clothes washing. He never sorts sleeves, arms, unroll socks so everything all scrunched up when it comes out the machine. He never puts pairs of socks in the washing machine either, just grabs what he finds so there is always a mass of odd socks sitting in a box. I refuse to pair them up so leave it to him then he complains that he hates doing the socks cos there is so many and he can never find a pair of socks to wear 🙄. He does more than his fair share In the house so I just bite my tongue and leave him to it but I feel the rage coming on when I see the odd sock box or odd socks on the airer.

he likes to tell me his opinion on anything I wear
classics include (a pink dress with pink spots) ‘you look just like mr blobbys Nan love’
or ‘you look like a posh,lesbian riding woman’ (black trousers and a black and white top)

That's made me laugh. My husband is brutally honest when asked for an opinion, including pointing to the bust of tops and saying I'd have a lot of loose fabric there (he's right with my two little fried eggs). Or telling me I looked like a Lego mini figure in another (square bodied). I kept the latter and it amuses me every time I wear it.

Otherwise, Olympic level snoring.
Spending a ludicrous length of time on the loo.
Not being able to do any household or holiday admin (we went to Majorca for a week and he told all his colleagues he'd been to Menorca).
Leaving the car with no petrol in it
Setting his alarm for half an hour before he needs to get up. Then going back to sleep and sleeping through all subsequent alarms. I have to wake him up every single morning.
Thinking that taking a turn getting the kids off to school involves padding downstairs 10 minutes before they're due to leave and sitting on your phone at the table.
I love him really.

There's just so much.