I have been ghosted!

[lifeisfunnysun]

I think I have been ghosted, and while I was so sad and upset, I am now laughing - at my age and all. This guy is nearly 50!

I have been chatting to this guy for a few months. Something I wouldn't normally do, I usually meet them quickly. But something drew me to him. And it's not often I actually quite like a man I come across on these apps. We met a few times. I liked him in person as well. Last weekend, we suggested meeting again, he asked when, I gave a day - tomorrow. I haven't heard from all week! 😂

I get some people are really busy. But I can't believe how sh!t this kind of behaviour is. And I can't believe it is happening at my age lol.

It's shockingly common on OLD. I've been on the receiving end of the slow fade more times than I can count over the 3 years I was on tinder. So freaking frustrating. Makes you question yourself when in reality it's nothing to do with you and all to do with a culture of instant gratification and seeing partners as commodities not real people.

I'm sorry. It sucks.
Sign up his phone number on a bunch of shady marketing lists maybe and rejoice in the fact he'll be spammed for months?

How nasty and rude of him. Especially in his 50s.

Interesting how lightly posters are towards it when a guy does it.

Just a day or so ago a thread where a woman did it to a man for a very good reason, all hell was raised about how bad she was.

Same with the silly phrase, you need to work on yourself more. No she doesn't.
Right. like men EVER work on themselves.

Stars71 This guy complained how hard it is for men his age to get any interest from women 😂 Yeah I thought I might be a back up option but he’s totally ghosted me now so I think I’m not even an option now haha

RandomMusings7 😂😂😂

By working on herself she'll be in a better position to weed these type of men out. Ghosting is shit from anyone but if you're newly single and have little resilience/still recovering from the split, incidents like this make more of an impact

Thanks yeah maybe I do need to ‘toughen’ up if this is the reality! missmamiecuddleduck

Sign up his phone number on a bunch of shady marketing lists maybe and rejoice in the fact he'll be spammed for months?

Random, you are a bad person

Lots of sympathy here, OP and other posters who have had the same thing. I had some crap dating experiences before meeting DH in my 40s. But I am profoundly glad not to be single now and relying on OLD. It does seem worse than anything I encountered back then.

Ghosting seems to be quite a normal way of ending OLD contact. Yet I don't know how anyone can think it's a decent thing to do to someone who hasn't offended you. Especially when you'd met in person, so you weren't just a few lines of text on a screen. (Obviously ok to ghost someone who has sent you an unsolicited dick pic! Though maybe men who do that are so thick they feel innocently hurt and rejected?)

At least it's saved you wasting time on someone not worthy of you. As Saffron says, we aren't the right fit for someone who would ghost, who give themselves away as being cowardly selfish losers

It wouldn’t even have bothered me if things just went quiet. But he didn’t reply when I told him when I was free to meet, after he asked! 🤷‍♀️

He literally works 2 mins from my office

I thought about sending him a msg to say I wanted to wish him a fond farewell, it’s a small world, and all the best

partly in case we come across each other in a work capacity and also partly to make him feel uncomfortable

Not worth it, right?

Deffo not worth it & you will feel worse after you send it more than likely.

Any message you send will only show him that he got to you and that he has power over you. Don't give him the satisfaction. Absute indifference is what you are aiming for

Ok thanks both
I am annoyed and I am annoyed that I am annoyed!
It’s just so shitty and immature

Don't they play some mind games eh? Well mine made me feel like shit last Friday and a week on I feel much better. We just need to remember they aren't worthy of us. I know it's hard because we question what we did wrong but we didn't do anything. Don't know about you @lifeisfunnysun but at 51, I'm annoyed at myself for falling for his future fakery. I even realise now, he couldn't even tell me the names of my two dogs, who he saw quite a bit of!!! X

Part of me thinks he's just busy and he forgot. It's not deliberate.

But then, that just means he forgot, which isn't great either. But is 1 better than deliberately ghosted.

No, not worth it at all. It will get to him more that he didn't get to finish it.

So I messaged asking if he fell in a ditch

he replied ‘oh.my.god. I typed a message but I didn’t hit send. I’m a bloody moron. So sorry.’

I wasn’t planning on engaging beyond haha please don’t worry, I just wanted to wish you a fond farewell.

What did you reply with?!

Just wishing him a fond farewell and not to worry about it

This. You read my mind! 😄

Why oh why did you do that? I'm guessing he didn't mention the supposed meet tonight then?

No I think it's good she did that...I think..but what do I know 😂🤔 I don't know.

All he said was that he was so sorry, he had typed a message but hadn’t sent and what a week he’s had etc
He didn’t say anything about meeting up or acknowledging that I had suggested tonight
so I just said honestly that’s fine, don’t worry, wanted to wish you a fond farewell, you seem like a pleasant chap etc
that was more than two hours ago and he hasn’t ‘read’ my message
he’s probably out on a date 😂

At first I thought yes that's an easy mistake to make but he obviously hadn't checked to see if you'd read it or anything.
If he's not pulling out all the stops to remedy the cock up then you're doing the right thing

I think it's good that you said that because if he doesn't reply or reply favourably then that's further clarification then (that he's a nob 😂). Whereas if u didn't reply he might think your not interested and his might have been a genuine mistake. Maybe 🤔. It would also be interesting to know what's so special about the kind of week he had. idk I spend waaaaaay too much time myself trying to figure out my own SO.