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Relationships

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If you ended up with your FWB ....

15 replies

Smileeriley · 02/10/2022 09:02

Can you tell me a little bit about it. What made you think you were headed for a relationship. What little things made you think I was heading that way?

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AskforJanice · 02/10/2022 09:13

I met someone and it was most definitely only going to be FWB arrangement. More his choice than mine at the time - I’d have been happy to see how things went with us - but he’d been in one relationship after another since a teenager and wanted the chance to date and play the field. He was very honest and respectful, treated me wonderfully when we were together and the sex was a amazing though so I decided I was happy with the arrangement.

I made a very conscious decision to accept it for what it was and not hang around waiting for him to change his mind. I continued seeing other people too. Around 3 months later he told me he’d fallen in love with me. We decided to continue with an open relationship for another 4/5 months or so until it got to the stage he couldn’t handle me being involved with other people and we decided together to make it excuses. Coming up two years together now and literally couldn’t be happier. He is the without doubt the best thing that had ever happened ti me

AskforJanice · 02/10/2022 09:17

Sorry didn’t really answer your question but I knew early on… long before he told me he loved me, that it was more than FWB despite what he insisted. I knows but the way he treated me, the way he looked at me, the way he took every opportunity to be with me

inheritanceshiteagain · 02/10/2022 09:35

AskforJanice · 02/10/2022 09:17

Sorry didn’t really answer your question but I knew early on… long before he told me he loved me, that it was more than FWB despite what he insisted. I knows but the way he treated me, the way he looked at me, the way he took every opportunity to be with me

That's really sweet 😊

Smileeriley · 02/10/2022 09:40

@AskforJanice aw, this is lovely to hear! I'm mad about him, he is a wonderful man. We worked together for two years, he left and we Go together six weeks after. We've been seeing each other for a year. H tells me I'm beautiful and that I'm also a beautiful person. Tells me I'm lovely all the time, said he could see more of m if I wanted so we are outside of the bedroom. After we spend the night together we spend half the day together. He told me I'm a beautiful person and h loves me to bits, told me he loves every bit of me.....he was drunk. He asked to see me the day he got home so I went to his.

He went away for two separate weekends, first one he rang me, that's when he said h loved every bit of me. He went away again and called me, we spoke for five hours until five in the morning. He said he'd love to bring me there

He holds onto me all night. When we go for a walk he will hold my hand.

He looks at me in a certain way, little smile on his face. If I look at him he does a little peck with his lips.

He plays songs and sings them while we're lying in bed as if he's singing them to me, sometimes he does.

I could go on.

He's without a doubt the most normal and beautiful man I've ever met

His family know about me and he's introduced me to his mum

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AskforJanice · 02/10/2022 09:42

I really should proof read my messages before clicking post 😳

He really is an amazing man. So kind, generous and supportive to me and my two DC. I know I'm very lucky how things worked out though. I think they key was accepting it for what it was at the time, not hoping/assuming it would lead to anything more.

Smileeriley · 02/10/2022 09:42

Sorry fo typos, phone driving me insane and can't be arsed to fix.

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Smileeriley · 02/10/2022 09:44

@AskforJanice

He sounds lovely 😊

Mine is so respectful! He's what I've been waiting for and what I deserve 😉

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AskforJanice · 02/10/2022 09:45

He sounds fab. And FWIW that really doesnt sound like a FWB arrangement to me! Especially introducing you to his family.

Have you spoken to him about whether he wants more now?

RewildingAmbridge · 02/10/2022 09:46

Bit different I guess but DH and I have been genuinely best friends since we were eleven and met on the school bus, we had a bit of a snog at 16 after a party but both laughed it off embarrassed. Both went off to different unis after A levels but kept in touch, he drove half way across the country just because he was at a loose end and wanted his male housemate/new friend to meet me.
We both had significant relationships then at about 24 both ended up single at the same time, I was back living in our home town and he was in London not far away, then had to move back to parents in the next county after his break up. We spent all of our free time together very easily, and nothing happened for a good six/eight months we'd even share a bed at times after nights out but nothing in it at all. Then we were out at a gig one night and I got chatted up at the bar, the guy seemed nice and gave me his number. We had a few drinks that night, got a cab back to mine got into bed as was often the case and he kissed me. He'll say now that suddenly realising if he didn't do something about it I could end up in a relationship again, made him take the chance.

From then on for about six months, we didn't really talk about the shift in our relationship still denied to others we were a couple and on the surface of it nothing had changed we still went out casually all the time, alone or with friends, except when we went home. The FWB stage.

I was in love with him, and I thought he felt the same so I just asked if he wanted to be my date at a wedding, he was chatting to a guy neither of us really knew and introduced me as his girlfriend. That was 13 years ago, now married with DC.

Smileeriley · 02/10/2022 09:47

@AskforJanice no and I probably won't. I'd rather just see what happens!

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Smileeriley · 02/10/2022 09:50

@RewildingAmbridge this is lovely, he was obviously mad about you for a long time.

Mine kissed me as I was leaving his house one evening and here we are.

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MarigoldMoonStone · 02/10/2022 09:55

I had a FWB while we were both working abroad, definitely no intentions of it being anything more however when we both went home for Xmas (opposite ends of the country) we realised how much we missed each other and made it official after that :) still together 5 years later with a kid and another on the way.

twoandcooplease · 02/10/2022 10:01

What little things made you think I was heading that way?

I had to let my guard down and trust that he wouldn't leave me and we were going to be the real thing. He let his guard down and trusted I wouldn't hurt him. He told me we would work and he'd never let me down.
We were lying in bed one morning after a couple of weeks of feelings. We both looked at each other and said let's give it a go
I've never looked back ❤️

Smileeriley · 02/10/2022 10:21

@twoandcooplease we do th looking at each other with feelings.....I think!

It's almost a year, I'm thinking he might have said something by now, but then I'm mad about him and I've said nothing.

I'm very happy with the way we are. He's a lovely man but I would love for us to just fall into each other if that makes sense.

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Bernadinetta · 02/10/2022 10:27

I’ve been with my (former)FWB for over 6 years and have a baby together. I was just out of a marriage where we’d grown apart and had become a sexless relationship so the FWB was just meant to be a bit of fun, sex, confidence boost rebound! I’m also 8 years older than him!

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