Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

Do you need to romance in a relationship

91 replies

Cl1998 · 15/09/2022 19:10

So im a young man who has never been in a relationship before, Im attracted to women sexually and I do want my own kids someday but I have never had a crush or viewed women in a romantic way. I never want to get married, Romantic gestures make me cringe and even going out on fancy dates isnt for me. Instead of going out to a fancy restraunt id rather order a chinese, watch some netflix and then have some sex straight after lol.

Im not gay or anything, Im very attracted to women sexually and I always eye them up thinking how they would look naked but romantically or emotionally I've never really been into them that way.

I wouldnt care if my wife/girlfriend wanted to leave me because at the end of the day A woman doesnt belong to me, Im more interested in raising kids and being a father than being in a romantic relationship although I dont want my kids growing up without a mother figure.

If I had kids of my own and my wife left me then I wouldnt look for another relationship ever again, id be happy enough just raising my kids and then gettng the odd FWB to fufil my sexual needs.

OP posts:
DropOfffArtiste · 15/09/2022 19:54

Just asked the question. If you don't take women out on dates, they won't want to have sex with you as I guess you've found.

Women (people) like to be treated as actual humans. Try it

Original poster
Cl1998 · 15/09/2022 19:56

@DropOfffArtiste but what about one night stands or prostitutes? Even when I try chasing women its always the man who has to approach, keep the conversations flowing, plan dates etc.

Why cant women do that for once? Why does the man have to propose and not the woman?

OP posts:
AllAloneInThisHouse · 15/09/2022 19:58

Cl1998 · 15/09/2022 19:53

@YouAreNotBatman lol I can take care of myself although yeah I do value a womans looks, im very visual.

Again, you sound like an average man.

Grandeur · 15/09/2022 19:59

Cl1998 · 15/09/2022 19:56

@DropOfffArtiste but what about one night stands or prostitutes? Even when I try chasing women its always the man who has to approach, keep the conversations flowing, plan dates etc.

Why cant women do that for once? Why does the man have to propose and not the woman?

Because thats how it works

Grandeur · 15/09/2022 20:00

Cl1998 · 15/09/2022 19:56

@DropOfffArtiste but what about one night stands or prostitutes? Even when I try chasing women its always the man who has to approach, keep the conversations flowing, plan dates etc.

Why cant women do that for once? Why does the man have to propose and not the woman?

And why are you comparing women looking for a relationship to one night stands and prostitutes? You must be joking at this point 😂

Original poster
Cl1998 · 15/09/2022 20:02

@Grandeur so is that why so many lesbians/bisexuals end up in relationships with men because women are too scared to approach each other so they just settle for men cause its easy?

OP posts:
DropOfffArtiste · 15/09/2022 20:03

Prostitutes are being raped for cash, not sure where that analogy fits with what you are saying. They wouldn't do it if they weren't being paid.

ONS and women approaching happen if they find the man particularly attractive. It can happen, doesn't sound like it is happening to you.

Grandeur · 15/09/2022 20:03

Cl1998 · 15/09/2022 20:02

@Grandeur so is that why so many lesbians/bisexuals end up in relationships with men because women are too scared to approach each other so they just settle for men cause its easy?

Eh?

Original poster
Cl1998 · 15/09/2022 20:07

@AllAloneInThisHouse and the average woman isnt turned on visually by men and find mens bodies unattractive, in fact its proven that all women are either bisexual or lesbian but never straight.

OP posts:
AllAloneInThisHouse · 15/09/2022 20:10

in fact its proven that all women are either bisexual or lesbian but never straight.

Okey, now you lost it.

Bye 👋🏻

DropOfffArtiste · 15/09/2022 20:11

Cl1998 · 15/09/2022 20:07

@AllAloneInThisHouse and the average woman isnt turned on visually by men and find mens bodies unattractive, in fact its proven that all women are either bisexual or lesbian but never straight.

Is that what they tell you, petal? Oh dear.

Fairislefandango · 15/09/2022 20:12

and the average woman isnt turned on visually by men and find mens bodies unattractive, in fact its proven that all women are either bisexual or lesbian but never straight.

Proven, eh? Right...

@Grandeur so is that why so many lesbians/bisexuals end up in relationships with men because women are too scared to approach each other so they just settle for men cause its easy?

Oh for goodness' sake. Maybe go and read some of the gazillions of threads on the Relationships board. That will enlighten you as to how 'easy' it is to settle for men. I expect many of the suffering straight OPs on there might wish they were lesbians!

Suzi888 · 15/09/2022 20:15

“know this does sound wrong but the only reason why I put myself out there on the dating scene is because I want to find a woman who I can have kids with. I've never been interested in getting married or finding love, Once I have my kids then if she wants to then she can leave or if she stops having sex then I'll just break up with her.”

No it doesn’t just sound wrong, it IS wrong. I hope you plan on informing the woman she is nothing but an incubator. The children won’t just be yours! they will be hers as well and she may take them with her!

I think you may be better off adopting or fostering. Once you’ve grown up.

CuntAmongstThePigeons · 15/09/2022 20:15

This is hilarious. You sound absolutely barking mate.

Of course most women find the men they're with, dating, having sex with attractive. Otherwise they wouldn't be doing any of the above.

You have some proper weird ideas about women, what do all your female friends think when you express these sentiments?

And what in particular makes you a.)want to be a father and b.) Think you'd be a good one.

What were your own parents like? What relationships have been modelled to you growing up?

Original poster
Cl1998 · 15/09/2022 20:18

@Fairislefandango well maybe I might find myself a woman one day who I actually love, I do have some mates that are women although they are more tomboyish. When women talk about love island or makeup I cant relate to it. I prefer a woman who doesnt wear much makeup and likes mechanics, fishing, shooting etc.

Id rather go for the farmer type woman than those instagram looking models

OP posts:
SillyFood · 15/09/2022 20:19

You don’t seem to view women as people. We are not things you can just fuck, impregnate and then raise children having waved us off into the sunset. Have you never had a friendship with a woman? A proper friendship where you respect her opinions, find her amusing etc. If you have, imagine having a friendship with a woman who you also find attractive. If you can do that then maybe, possibly, one day you might have hope of having a successful relationship with a woman.

And stay off Reddit. Obviously.

Flumpymc · 15/09/2022 20:20

😆😆😆😆😆

QuattroFormaggi · 15/09/2022 20:25

@Cl1998 are you on Tinder currently? I think I may have swiped left on you GrinGrin

Closetbeanmuncher · 15/09/2022 20:32

Raging mommy issues

Closetbeanmuncher · 15/09/2022 20:33

When women talk about love island or makeup I cant relate to it

I can’t relate to that and I’m a woman, what sort of fucking women are you dealing with?? 🤦‍♀️

Sandra1984 · 15/09/2022 20:33

What I’m reading in this post is that you’re looking for a uterus to bear your children and someone to have sex with occasionally but can’t bother with full filing the needs of said partner as she would be some sort of “prop” in this future life project you have figured out for yourself. I believe you need to do like michael Jackson, find a surrogate mother, pay her well and make a proper agreement.

hagathachristie · 15/09/2022 20:35

God you're a catch .

Marry me .

Actually no . Don't. You have a very clinical view of women . You realise they are sentient? Not just an object for you to fuck , bear your children and then discard? Relationships are usually a two way street . With mutual attraction, respect and togetherness. Not some cold clinical contract . How old are you ?
No woman in her right mind would be attracted to what you're offering. You basically want a brood mare .
What does the woman you have children with get out of this exactly?
Are yku a Brad Pitt lookalike?
A hedge fund manager?
10" cock?
Fabulous in bed ?

You sound like a selfish, self absorbed little boy . Not an attractive proposition. Go learn some personal growth , some social skills and then maybe you'll get lucky and lose your virginity.

Original poster
Cl1998 · 15/09/2022 20:39

@DropOfffArtiste lol many "straight" women are sexually attracted to women and watch lesbian porn/have sexual fantasies of women.

Many women admit to not finding mens bodies a turn on and think that women are more sexy. Id say a big percentage of women are bisexual

OP posts:
hagathachristie · 15/09/2022 20:43

Cl1998 · 15/09/2022 20:39

@DropOfffArtiste lol many "straight" women are sexually attracted to women and watch lesbian porn/have sexual fantasies of women.

Many women admit to not finding mens bodies a turn on and think that women are more sexy. Id say a big percentage of women are bisexual

Can you evidence your research on this please ? Because you are quite frankly talking utter bollocks. God I pity any woman who happens across your path .
What dating apps you on ? Just so I can avoid .

Fairislefandango · 15/09/2022 20:46

Many women admit to not finding mens bodies a turn on and think that women are more sexy. Id say a big percentage of women are bisexual

Who are these many women? Women you've spoken to? Why would anyone believe this statement on the basis of you saying 'I'd say...'? I bet your Internet history is a sight to behold.