Fuming my boyfriend has bought me a cat

[Banana2079]

I absolutely love and adore cats but I have one already and live in a very small home

boyfriend brought home a 16 week bengal cross kitten last night as a surprise and am fuming

cost him £150

firstly 16 weeks for me personally, is too old for a kitten between 10-12 weeks is better I’ve had cats and many kittens all my life and I prefer this age as easier to socialise them the way I want

secondly she is absolutely terrified and extremely timid . He didn’t even bother to go look at the litter and see the kittens with their mum, usually I would go for the most confident. He bought poor kitten from back of a car . Have spent hours trying to coax her from under the bed , she has spent the evening scrambling around the house in terror

(obviously I know it takes a lot of time for a kitten to settle in new environment ) my other cat is livid that I’ve shut him in my daughters room

but now I’m starting to feel increasingly angry at him, esp as I can’t afford another pet and the fact he spent 150 on what is basically a mongrel cat - no such breed as bengal cross they are either bengal or not .

the person he bought it from is refusing the kitten back and I feel shit to readvertise this poor cat it’s been through enough , other option is a shelter but again , traumatising
what do I bloody do

He said it was a private home apparently kitten came with a vaccination certificate and vet check so I don’t think she would have been used as dog bait

That's not what you said previously

I have a Bengal and she’s the sweetest, friendliest thing-like a dog. Wary of other people but very loving to her family. The wariness is a hangover from her wild dna, the vet told me. She is no harder to deal with than any other cat. I think Bengals are seen as problematic because so many are kept as house cats when their temperament isn’t really suitable.
if you really don’t want her, contact Cats Protection who do a home direct rehiring scheme. She should be easy to re home to a vetted person as Bengal crosses are popular.

Does he always make such rash ill thought out decisions? That’s really worrying. Spends £150 on a cat, when you haven’t asked for one. Has he done something he’s not telling you? Very strange behaviour.

You sound very sensible op just get that kitten out of your house and to him mums as quickly as you can.

I'm reasonably well off, but I rescued a kitten a couple of years ago which turned out to need an expensive specific diet due to a health condition. My old cat and my current dog (touch wood) cost peanuts to keep as they are very healthy - the new one is another story!
If I had known I definitely wouldn't have taken her on. I think it's really unfair to force another cat into an existing cat too - thru often don't get on and end up living in a much smaller area of the house and missing out on cuddles and company.

"On the plus side he saved a poor kitten from becoming a bait animal or something equally horrible."

No he didn't, he donated £150 towards the continued breeding of kittens like this.

Anyway, maybe his mum will want to keep the kitten, if she has the time and money, or failing that contact Cats Protection- they are excellent but they're often hard to get hold of as so busy and often full up- or your vet might know a local rescue who could help with rehoming

Threads like this fill me with emotion. I can't bear to think of an animal that's unwanted. And to the PP who suggested PTS a kitten - are you off your head?!?! shame on you.

OP I think you should take some time to consider your options. There would be so many families willing to take in this kitten if you decide you can't, I would take her too.

All of these 'Dump the BF' comments are ridiculous. Get over yourselves ffs.

He tried to do something nice, he just misjudged it a bit. It's not like he's been sleeping around with OPs friends and sister whilst emotionally and physically abusing her is it!

Your boyfriend sounds like an idiot.

I agree he should be responsible for the kitten. What kind of people just randomly purchase pets as gifts?

Animals are a commitment. That includes the financial aspect

He bought poor kitten from back of a car

Isn't it more likely it was someone who bought the kitten as a 10 week and decided they couldn't/wouldn't keep it so sold it on - rather than a breeder . So there might not even be a Mum+kittens to view.

I look at adverts on Gumtree etc at Bengal Cross and think "You're a TABBY "

Ask him to contribute towards injections, insurance and her food, although food is not expensive for a kitten. Keep kitten in one room away from older cat and child. If boyfriend refuses to help pay for kitten put him to sleep.

This kitten won't be though, will it.

He has been a bit of an idiot and I would be concerned about the cat given that it's 15 weeks and was very cheap.

I have bengals and they are expensive to buy, my friend bought a cross recently (I mean, no offence either, but a 'Bengal cross' is just a moggy really, they are already a cross breed of sorts which is how they exist in the first place) and it was £400. One of mine is an ex breeding queen and she was about £200 which is more the going rate for a 'rehome' situation.

I'd wonder if yours has been homed and returned already. No matter though, it's only 15 weeks so you can turn that round if you want, but the point is that you never wanted the cat anyway! I would rehome at this stage where it's still a cute kitten and maybe have a chat with your boyfriend about how perfume and jewellery make nice gifts for the future.

What is wrong with you? How could you even suggest putting a cat to sleep when it’s literally just nervous being in a new house?
The fact that you’re doubling down is bizarre. Jesus.

Is this post for real ?

Contact a small cat rescue or charity local to you, they will be able to help or will put you in touch with someone who is looking for a kitten and would be happy to have her. There are always people looking for kittens.

The people suggesting to put the kitten to sleep- I'm not one to suggest keeping an animal alive at all costs, but seriously, it's a normal kitten behaving in a normal kitten way in a new home, it's not like we're talking about an aggressive, incontinent 17 year old dog. A healthy kitten will be rehomed with no problem at all.

I'm not sure I would want to be with someone so thoughtless as to buy a kitten from the back of a car tbh.

But a half Bengal is half Bengal. I think I get what your saying as in it's not a cockapoo or 'desired' breed/ cross breed, but aside from doing cat shows or just showing off, a half Bengal will still have some or many of the breed specific temperaments and needs. ie, needs more climbing, exercise, stimulation, enjoy swimming.

Just because it doesn't have the same market value as a full breed doesn't mean it isn't what it is, which is half Bengal. It was definitely sold at moggy prices anyway.

Disgusting! You should be ashamed of yourself! Luckily no reputable vet would out a healthy bengal to sleep just because you can't be arsed with it.

Do you have a local cat protection shelter? They may be able to help if you do, my parents adopted a very feral kitten from them, she was terrified of everything and everyone, now she is a very happy lap-cat, in the right home with the right care she will easily thrive.

@PermanentTemporary its a very cruel option that you suggested, why would anyone put a healthy animal to sleep? It’s like treating them like an object you know longer want and happy to throw away. You should be ashamed.

One you've got the stuff for one cat, the second doesn't cost much more. You can get multi pet discounts on insurance. I love cats but I'd be fuming if anyone did this.

£150 will barely cover the costs of raising a fully vaccinated, chipped and checked 16 week old kitten. That doesn't sound like dodgy breeder, more someone whose cat got out one night.

Key point is nobody should be buying animals as a 'surprise', I'd be as annoyed as the OP.

He didn’t ‘misjudge’ or make a mistake ‘out of love’ he is a complete idiot with zero common sense and very immature. Bin him

Call cats protection. www.cats.org.uk/what-we-do/giving-up-a-cat Explain the situation and they’ll take care of the kitten and rename it. You keeping the kitten when you’re concerned about your health is not a good idea.

WTAF???