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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

I had a past, I cant help this. Anyone else feel like this?

95 replies

partypoop · 22/01/2008 09:16

After been together now for over 7 years my partner has brought up my past again. It caused lots of stress in the beginning but has been great now for a long while. I have a ds from my previous relationship and obviously live in a home that I had brought with my ex but only lived in it together for 6mths. My dp now has lived with me here for these past 6 years and we have settled, however last night he re brought up the past after talking to my ex apparently and hearing him say things like when we looked on the market ect ect. Dh has not liked this about our home and has come back to me and brought it up last night. It was a horrific ordeal for me years ago as I was stuck in this situation where the house is secured for me by a family member and back then I couldnt lose it as our relationship was not good and new. I know it is not nice for him but by now I thought we had a perfect life and all insecurities were gone and I have done absolutely everything to make it perfect. All my possesions had to be changed, my rooms redecorated ect. Cause I had them with him. We have a dd together now aswell who is nearly 6yrs and I am to say the least heart broken to find I am still haunted by my horrible past. I had to hear him go on and on last night and I cant seem to say anything right and now we are not speaking and I feel so so down. I was told well its your f* fault and your f* past. It has to come up about that I have slept with him here ect ect. I have done everything in life to make the perfect life and cannot do anymore, got rid of baby books,videos,photos. That I have huge huge guilt about. I feel hurt and sick that again after everything he seems to not face the facts and wants my sympathy but what I give is not enough apparently and it makes me shake to discuss the topic, i am that stressed. He was extemely possesive in the past aswell as myself and was not a good relationship and I fear it again. I am now not possesive and positive and happy. I thought it was perfect. He left this morning without speaking and I am now home alone and very sad

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partypoop · 22/01/2008 17:30

no sorry, think I have made it sound worse. Got rid of ones(photos) with ex in ect. Still have photos of ds. Yeah dp is fine with ds. Sorry re read and I did make it sound worse

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YouKnowNothingOfTheCrunch · 22/01/2008 17:32

Is he back from work yet partypoop?

partypoop · 22/01/2008 17:34

no, soon!

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YouKnowNothingOfTheCrunch · 22/01/2008 17:38

Well good luck! Will try to check in later. Don't back down or take any of his rubbish. You have nothing to be ashamed of - him on the other hand...

partypoop · 22/01/2008 17:41

Thank you, doubt I will get back on here later but lets hope all this silly stuff will be laid to rest. Finally, I hope.

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Kezza7779 · 22/01/2008 18:08

I live in my house with my DH that i bought many years ago with my EX fiance!!! DH only ever complained once - about the bed (understandably) we bought a new one!!!! End of story......!

Why would DH have anything to complain about, he has a lovely wife and a lovely home. All of our money goes into a joint acct and we both cover the mortgage and bills. A house is a house, we love each other and live inside the house. We are now pregnant and our baby will then live in the house. I own it, he pays towards it. Happy days!

partypoop · 23/01/2008 09:58

Thats good kezza7779, another positive situation. However, didnt go as I would have liked last night. Couldnt talk until late when the kids were in bed. Feel mushed in the head! So much said. Dunno what to think. On one hand he said all he wanted was a cuddle out of the situation mon night when he told me what ex had said but says he didnt want to hear all my past stuff,like I wasnt to respond! This was when I said it was only six months in this house and I was unhappy anyway. To me this was ment to be the correct thing to say to give comfort but it appears was wrong? It was apparently my fault because of this. I tried to explain and sometimes I felt he got it and others not. I still had to hear about my past over and over and over last night. He has slept here shit here,ate hear, coupled with things that I felt was good for him to say and others that were not. He doesnt expect me to move he said but would just like to hear me say it would have been nice to have done things together ie the house with him. I said well obviously, but that it was really irelivant because of the situation and that i suppose I dont think it helps matters for me to say it. I actually feel it isnt of great importance to me in honestly as I have been there but it didnt bring happiness. tried to explain this but I really dont know if he got it. He didnt like me to say it was irelivant and was not happy so I just agreed yeah be nice. What I didnt say was it would be nice because I wouldnt get this grief. I had to hear later how that is all he wanted to hear and that it had taken an hour to get me to say it without the 'irelivant' part. I heard endless things of this was my fault that was my fault. he commented I didnt text him and he was waiting for me too. Couldnt understand that I didnt feel I had done anything wrong and what was the point in acting like I had. Finished on iffy terms again gone 2am because I got fed up and moaned about I felt irritated on his responce of how it had taken an hour to get that sentense out of me controling. Was tired and totally confused, this morning I could not go through anymore it was not healthy and so gave him a cuddle by and he responded it was all stupid and didnt want to lose me over it? Overal he had said he had delt with it originally in the two weeks he had kept it quiet but then it just built up?? I did give as good as I got in the early hours and said it was going to ruin or end our relationship, also if he didnt cope with it we would have to have counciling and that I was not going to stand for him shouting and swearing at me. He says he has delt with it he is just saying what he used to feel and what it had brought back. confused,I am..........

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AttilaTheMeerkat · 23/01/2008 10:31

Would suggest you read a copy of "Why does he do that?" written by Lundy Bancroft.

This man is behaving in a controlling manner towards you and he's doing you and your child no favours at all. If he does not want to lose you over this then he will need to talk openly with a counsellor as why he is behaving like this (there are always reasons likely extending back into his own childhood). For what its worth I feel his problems are deeply ingrained and were learnt long before you came into his life.

partypoop · 23/01/2008 11:38

I will definately make sure I keep on top of the situation and if things keep happening in this manner then a counsellor it will have to be. I did put this forward last night to him that if he cannot deal with it we would have to see someone before our relationship is ruined. He just replied as though he was dealing with it and was managing fine until our argument.Very interesting about the childhood thing, yeah and maybe I should get hold of that book to read. I really will look into things seriously thanks Attilathemeerkat

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postingatlast · 23/01/2008 11:51

a thought just came to mind. What is the situation between you guys with regards to having another kid? Sorry if you have already talked about this. It's just when he vaguely says he wished he had done certain things with you, is this maybe one of the things he is referring to?

partypoop · 23/01/2008 12:04

We already have our own dd together. Also of course my ds from previous relationship. Its funny as he is a great dad and fantastic in regards to family life together. There are good qualities. As regards to wishing he has done certain things with me, he just seems soley speaking about the buying of a home, looking and haveing a mortgage together ect. Doesnt like paperwork with ex's name on or thoughts of what he has done here. I think he must think the home is the link to problems and yet it would not really solve the fact of 'I have had a life before him'

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Wisteria · 23/01/2008 12:14

PP - they're all his issues not yours. My MIL has a partner like this and they've even had to buy new cutlery which I find really bizarre.

Counselling might help but he has to accept that the past can't change, only the future, he also needs to accept that everyone has a past of some description.

FWIW I had an partner like this but he knew the situation when we got together and it did destroy us in the end because he couldn't see that I couldn't change things and it was his insecurity that was at fault. I found out later that he was still married and hadn't told his wife about me at all so I think a psychologist would have said that it was his own guilt over the situation which was fuelling the jealousy.

Cam · 23/01/2008 12:16

I live in the house that my dh bought when he was still married to and living with his ex-wife. As she took a lot of the furniture as past of their divorce settlement we have chosen or inherited most of the stuff now here.

It doesn't bother me in the slightest that they used to live here (I do wonder if the fact that they didn't have children "helps" though as there is nothing tying my dh to his past?)

I, however, have a much older dd from my a previous relationship and my dh has occasionally shown jealousy regarding my past, so I don't really think its the house, its more likely to be sexual jealousy.

We have since had a dd together.

partypoop · 23/01/2008 12:18

oh my god wisteria. We have not changed our cuttlery and it is one of the things he has mentioned before. I said this was the only problem in a long while about the home but he is always into cutlery as he wants it changed. I am just so easy going that I have not worried or cared if he wants his own here or not!! I guess I have obviously just become accustomed to this behavour

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partypoop · 23/01/2008 12:20

Most of my posessions have been changed so I presume I dont care anymore what goes. I over looked that

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postingatlast · 23/01/2008 12:23

ok, thanks. Look, I do not take the fundamentalist stance of, for example, Madamez. I wouldn't go as far as to say he is dangerous as there are clearly lots of things which work for you both too. But I know so many men who moved in to their wives' homes, for any number of practical reasons, and for whom it is really no issue at all. I really think you need to ask him to draw a line in the sand on this issue, it is a fruitless use of nervous and emotional energy for you both. In reading what you write about him, he comes across as first and foremost very insecure, in himself and in regards to the role he has in the household. You can try to reassure him on this so that he understands that he is valued and that you are so happy to be with him instead of with your ex. And if that really does not stop these issues then, yes, as has been said, they probably go deeper than you or he realise and he needs to find a resource(s) to understand what is going on for him.

If I were you (which, as a man, I am clearly not!), I would steer a very clearly communicated path:

I was with someone before you.
I left him, I didn't want to be with him.
I met you, I want to be with you.
You are a better partner in every way than my ex.
Of course I cannot change anything about my past or my situation when I met you - and neither would I want to.
You have to accept how I got here and I have to accept the same about you.
Your jealousy is irrational and no matter how much you bring it up, there is absolutely nothing I can do about it. It would be different if you were jealous of someone I see in the present, at work for example. But you can say all you want about this house and my ex, there is nothing I can do to change my choices of the past.
If you continue to have such a big issue with the house, we need to look at practical ways of moving. If we cannot find a way, we will stay here as it is to the advantage of all concerned. If we do not move, it is no reflection on you as a partner, a man, or a dad.
While I sympathise with the fact that you are suffering inside because of this, I cannot continue to support you in your distress. As I have stated earlier, there is nothing I can do to change what came before. We can shape our future together, we canot change our pasts.
If these issues continue, in spite of my reassurances, I think you may need to look at what might be lying below the surface to generate these feelings of jealousy and possessiveness. You have so many qualities and I love being with you but possessiveness is deeply unattractive and if you cannot find a way with me to overcome it, you will have to find resources elsewhere, for example talking it through with a counsellor. We can go and see one together if you wish.
Because I we cannot find a way to move through this, and you do not show the desire to find a way for yourself, I think we will reach an impasse which may be 100 times harder to move through than the one we are currently in.

I hope that helps

postingatlast · 23/01/2008 12:25

correction, last sentence, because if not because I

Wisteria · 23/01/2008 12:39

My personal opinion is though, that even if every last thing was replaced because he asked you to including the cutlery and even the house, then his jealousy would then impinge on another part of your life together and you don't know what that will be yet - which is worrying (to me).

He needs to sort out why he has the irrational thoughts and learn to 'unlearn' them before this will stop. It's hard though as he needs to come to this conclusion by himself or by an ultimatum such as postingatlast's post. My advice would be to stop pandering to him completely and if it resurges again to give a firm ultimatum.

I failed miserably with my exbf so we split. the final straw was when he asked me to leave my dcs as they had a dad so didn't need me as well . I realised then that there would always be 'a problem' with an aspect of me and thus the problem was with him.

Cam · 23/01/2008 12:40

Well said Wisteria

partypoop · 23/01/2008 12:42

Thanks. I certainly feel I have made very plain most of the beginning of what you have said. I am just afraid of the house situation. I dont know if you have read about it and that I am in a situation where I am secure in whatever happens to me as I have my home safely mortgaged by a family member. I have caused them to have to help me out and have got me in the secure state I am. I dont wish to put myself in a situation again where I lose what they done for me and they feel they have to help me when I know they wouldnt be able to again. You dont think, and I feel bad to say this about dp, but you dont think its because I have this security and he doesnt do you?

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postingatlast · 23/01/2008 12:49

very true Wisteria (you are often right). Jealousy will come up in other [unexpected] ways, even if you remove everything he asks to because jealousy is a thought process (and can be unlearnt, like Wisteria says) and it can be applied to any object/person/situation which the mind choses. Definitely no point in pandering to him and I tried to put that across in my post too. I think that jealous/possessive behaviour is also an attempt to get a response/attention so you are possibly also (totally unwittingly) perpetuating the situation. He needs to find other, healthier, ways of getting affirmation and approval and that is where a counsellor may come in. Put simply, if he felt good and strong about himself, he really would not give two shits about any of this house and ex stuff...

ps - why is it so hard to type "behaviour" without typing "behavious"?!

Wisteria · 23/01/2008 12:49

Quite possibly, but it's irrelevant to the unrealistic demands he is insisting on. You need that security for your children. It sounds as though this is nothing at all to do with your past and more to do with his - did his Mum or Dad have affairs or past girlfriends?

I have a new dp now and so can see it more clearly as he is more rational. he has to 'cope' with my xdh coming round 3-4 times a week to pick the girls up, my equity paid for our house and I have a majority share in it, even though he pays the mortgage. If we split up he would walk out with virtually nothing as house prices are stagnant. I have pictures up on the wall that my x has bought me, am playing a cd he bought me and the girls have photos in their rooms.

Incidentally our cutlery was wedding gift to me and xdh and he's never even mentioned it .

Wisteria · 23/01/2008 12:50

because ous is a more common suffix than our........

postingatlast · 23/01/2008 12:52

what exactly is the story with the mortgage and the house? You have alluded to it a lot but it is hard to get to the bottom of what the exact situation was with the family member concerned. And yes, of course, your property security could be a cause for his insecurity and jealousy (it's the alpha male thing again) but don't let that be a smokescreen over what is lying beneath. Just because it may be a cause, doesn't mean it is right!

partypoop · 23/01/2008 12:54

Having children makes it so much more important knowing I am safe in this home if anything did happen in this relationship. I am secure with this home and he cannot do much about it. Does that mean I have a problem not committing to him and do I cause a problem because I am not excited about moving/buying a home together? Is some of it my fault as i dont want to be in a valnurable position? But how could I do any different with things as it is? He certainly was not easy to talk too last night and would not be in a split situation

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